The Hi-Greylander stood proudly on top of the red-earth cliff - hi-tech sunglasses gleaming in the sun. The voice droned on steadily.     ".....your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to track down the missing green bead! The entire future of those nutcases who live there depends on it! And oh, by the way, this message will self-destruct in 3 seconds."

The Hi-Greylander ripped the hi-tech sunglasses off his head and flung them over the cliff just before they exploded into a million shards of dangerous shrapnel. "Good thing they warned me this time!" He thought to himself as he stared at what was left of his shades. His relief was short lived as he remembered the contents of the message - Greyland was once again in danger.
That group of insane weirdos who created the cyber-world had hit a major hiccup...... seems 'someone' or 'something' had found their most secret codes, interfaced their own version of the 'I love you' virus, and were systematically eating up important files!

"Aw man!" He muttered to himself, "When DO I get to take a vacation anyway!", and he jumped into his helicopter. Where to start? He knew he had to hurry, Greylanders were once again counting on him..............!
 

Later, the Hi-Greylander sat staring at his lap-top, idly picking sun-glass shards from his hair and mulling over the personnel files ...trying to put together an IMF ...his team. Looking over his final choices he wondered if it was crazy to choose this bunch ... or perhaps it was just crazy enough to work!....

 
 
 
 

UNDERCOVER!

The two inseparable Special Agents, whose secret codes amount to the catchy numerical ID of 0014, sat next to each other at the corner table in the sleazy strip joint, chain-smoking, and hoping their cover as talent scouts for a new casino was unexposed. Their unmatchable investigative skills had uncovered a lead....someone here knew where to find the greenbead, and 0014 were determined to find out who!

The lights dimmed, the music started...... the audience gasped in awe at the beautiful exotic dancer who took the floor, long black hair flying out behind her. 0014 almost forgot this was supposed to be 'business' as the dancer swayed and edged her way over, winking at them as she swung around a chrome pole near their table. The two looked at each other. "She winking at US?" one said to the other.
    Sensuously hooking a leg up onto their table, the dancer slid a heavily beaded and frilled garter off her beautifully developed thigh, twirled it around her manicured finger, and flipped it at one half of the 0014 duo.
They tried to keep their composure as she leaned in close and whispered huskily in their ears, "Dressing room 4B...after the show." Then she was gone.

They found dressing room 4B without difficulty, and quietly, silently slipped inside.
 0014 spoke first. "OK, baby! You'd better talk!" And they held their service specials pointed at the dancer's back.
    "Is THAT any way to greet your ol' buddy?" The dancer swung around in her chair, pulled off a latex face-mask, to reveal, not the beautiful exotic dancer 0014 had expected, but Special Agent 21C, master of disguise, grinning his cute wide grin at them.

0014 were miffed, if not a little embarrassed. But 21C soon had them back to the business at hand. He had discovered a link (the very same lacy garter he had enticed 0014 with earlier!) between the missing greenbead, and a certain lady who was no stranger to Greyland law enforcers. Yes, you guess it......Vanna Lace!

21C explained he was just about to extract the whereabouts of the
greenbead from voluptuous Vanna, when she had gasped, her eyes crossed,
and she had slumped forward........dead! At that very same minute, the
Special Agent known as 'Anchor man' had come crashing through the window,
swinging expertly on a wire attached to the Hi-Greylander's helicopter, the
sharp-shooter rifle that had just killed Vanna still pointed at her head!
Anchor Man had killed Vanna moments before finding out the truth, but
not before she had handed C21 the garter and gasped with her last breath,
the words, "Beware the ba- a- a-"!

Needless to say the Hi-Greylander was not impressed with his team's performance to date, and let them know of his displeasure by calling in......... his top female agent...............The Security Operative!!
    On hearing this news 0014 hung their heads in shame! It had come to this, once more outsmarted by a WOMAN! C21 tried to cheer them up. "Don't worry!" He declared, "At least now we KNOW the enemy is a 'ba-a-a-'!!!"
0014 looked at each other with raised eyebrows, and then shook their heads. C21 could certainly be 'strange' at times.
    "So," they said "When will the SO arrive?"
   At that moment the dressing room door burst open, and the SO (Security Operative) walked slowly in. She looked the agents over with disdain as C21 struggled to catch his breath (he'd always had a crush on the SO) and 0014
straightened their bow-ties and looked uncomfortable.
The SO lit a Chesterfield, letting the smoke drift unhindered up to the fire detector. 0014 were aghast...... the SO always DID have more than her fair share of 'chutzpah! But they were feeling strangely drowsy..... why couldn't they keep their eyes open? They glanced over at C21, who seemed also to be having difficulty  focusing........for he would later swear he could see a black, furry bat hanging from the SO's outstretched arm! Perhaps it was just the smell of greasepaint.......it sometimes had a hallucinatory effect on him.........
    The SO was speaking....... "Now boys, I need some information." 0014 struggled to concentrate. They HAD to perform well, the SO would report back directly to the HI-Greylander, and they needed the report to be  good! Whatever the SO needed, they would get!

The hot red earth cliff was familiar under his feet and hands as C21 climbed steadily and sure-footed up the sheer face. But how did he get here? He was used to regular training climbs like this....but the last 24 hours seemed lost to him. He looked back down below him, and realised that he was the front-man on this climb, like he had been so many times before, leading 0014 and the SO up the rock face...towards.........wait, wasn't this the top secret entrance to the cave which held the top-secret computer room where all the top-secret files and for-your-eyes-only information was kept?
    He hesitated briefly, losing his grip and a momentary panic set in as his left foot slipped dangerously! "Don't go to pieces now!" he muttered to himself, but nearly lost his right foot hold as a something flapped close to his ear.
He looked left, in time to see a bat glide around and appear to land on the SO's back.
    "Good grief!" He said to himself. "What was in the mineral water last night!"
'Bats' aside, he knew he had to focus his mind on the task at hand. He had no idea why they were on their way up to the secret computer room, but if he hesitated now, they could all be dead. He would worry about 'bats' later!

They had all four just made it onto the ledge, when the Hi-Greylander's helicopter ominously rose level with them. The door burst open, and out swung 'Anchor Man' (he LOVES doing this) and a single shot rang out from his rifle, tearing right through the bat who was hanging from the SO's back, and straight into the SO's heart.
    C21 and 0014 were stunned........ the Anchor Man had shot the SO! He swung onto the ledge, keeping his rifle pointed at the body slumped on the red earth. As they stared speechless at the Anchor Man's rash act, the helicopter landed and the Hi-Greylander stepped out. Slowly removing his shades, he rolled the SO over onto her back, and with a swift gesture to the Anchor Man, the two of them grabbed the SO's neck and pulled!! Latex gave way to skin, the SO's face contorted and twisted, pulling back to reveal.............VANNA LACE?? AGAIN??
    "Will someone tell us WHAT'S GOING ON here!" Panted C21, out of breath, not from the climb (fit as he was) but from the speed with which these strange events were happening.
    Someone else climbed out of the helicopter and ran over to the figure slumped on  he ground. 0014 both took out their 45's and pointed them nervously at her.
    "It's OK." The Hi Greylander laughed, "This time it IS the SO!"
Neither of the 0014's were convinced though, and kept the revolvers handy just in case.
    The real SO grabbed Vanna's head off the ground, looked deeply into her eyes, and hissed viciously "OK doll, WHERE'S the greenbead!"
"Yo..u'll........ne..v..er.......nev..er........find.....it...........ugh!"
    Her head lolled back as she fainted.
   "All is lost!" lamented the Anchor Man! "We'll never find the greenbead!"
    C21 and 0014 were still confused though. "If THIS is the real SO, and THIS is the real Vanna, who was the first 'Vanna' that the Anchor Man killed?"
    "Just another of Vanna's famous 'decoys', I'm afraid." Answered the Hi-Greylander. "And we are no closer to finding the greenbead either!"
    "Wa-a-it a minute!" Yelled C21! "What were the 'decoy's' last words?
Something about beware the b-a-a-a. COULD she have been trying to say 'Bat'??!!"
    It took everyone exactly 1,35 seconds to make a dive for the bat, which was still hooked onto Vanna's back. There was quite a scramble, but eventually the Hi-Greylander ended up with the dead bat in his hands, and there, in its mouth, wedged between two teeth, was the precious greenbead!

Later, in the safety of the cave, the greenbead was carefully extracted from the bat's teeth, and now lay nestled gently in the Hi-Greylander's hand. The excitement at  finding the bead had been so great that no-one had heard Vanna spit out the words, "You hav...en't....won...ye-et!....Th..i..s.....is far..from over......!" And no one seemed to notice later, that the 'body' had disappeared! Has Vanna survived to wreak havoc on an innocent Greyland once again?

These thoughts were furthest from the Hi-Greylander's mind though, as he held the precious greenbead in his hands. For something was a little different about the  greenbead. He couldn't quite figure it out, but there was a subtle 'change' ......perhaps the population had simply grown a bit since he last counted, or perhaps it was just the Lord High Keeper of the Votes having one of her 'parties' again....... He smiled as he gently lay the bead back in its rightful place ...in his regalia
 
 
 

© Sonja & Marnie 2001