1. Realistic sexy fic with Faith, Buffy and Willow
2. Alone in a room somewhere (doesn't matter where)
3. Whipped cream
4. Chocolate sauce
5. Honey
6. Willow has to say someplace in the fic. "I don't think it'll fit there, Faith." and have Faith respond. "Sure it will Red, you just have to wiggle it a little."

And one of the Scooby gang has to catch them in a very interesting and compromising postion.

{{As far as most nights went, this was a pretty good one for Xander Harris.  He’s sold three boxes of power bars, just left his basement where Anya was sleeping soundly after congratulating him, and now he was on his way to Stevenson Hall to surprise Buffy and Willow by taking them out for a celebratory Bronze trip.  He was feeling good.}}

{{He approached the dorm and bounded up the stairs.  As he approached the door, he was about to knock but heard them giggling from the other side.  Curiosity getting the best of him, he pressed his ear to the door and listened intently.}}

“You didn’t!  Buffy that’s gross!”  Willow sat at her desk with her mouth gaping wide open.

Buffy leaned back on her bed and laughed.  “Don’t tell me you and Oz never. . .”  She got her answer when Willow shook her head until she thought it was gonna fall off.

“Come on Red, you never even thought about it once?”

{{<Faith?  Faith is in there too?>  Xander debated whether he should go in or not, especially since Faith was involved.  From the tone of her voice, he could almost see the blush rising up Willow’s cheeks.}}

“No, I never. . h-he never. . that’s just. . .yuck.”  Willow finally managed to get out.

Buffy crossed the room and walked up next to Willow.  “Come on Faith.  I’ll hold her steady. . .you go over there and get the bag and start putting it in slowly.”

Faith got up and walked over to the mini-fridge.  She pulled out a can of whipped cream and joined Buffy and Willow at the hacker’s side of the room.  “See this?”  Faith shook the can up and down a few times.  “It’s the best when all the air is built up.  Then you push on the nozzle very slowly and. . .”

{{Xander could hear an odd hissing noise coming from the room.  <What the hell are they doing in there?>}}

Buffy’s eyes went wide with delight.  “Oooh yum. . .I can’t wait!”  She laughed.  “Faith! Be careful with that stuff. . .you’re gonna get it all over the place and I don’t wanna clean it up.”

”It’s gonna go all over if you keep moving, B.  Now stay still, it has to be just right and don’t worry, if any of it drips then I’ll just have to lick it off personally.”

{{<GULP!>  A few very vivid images flashed through Xander’s mind and he thought suddenly that it had gotten awfully hot in the hallway.}}

“You never pass up a chance to exercise your tongue, do you Faith?”  Buffy commented dryly.

“Gotta keep it in shape, B. . .just like any other muscle in your body.”  She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.  “Okay Red, it’s your turn. . . put it in nice and slow.”

{{<Willow?>  Xander couldn’t believe his ears.  It had to be a spell, or a demon got a hold of her or something. . .Willow
would never willingly.  A few more images flashed in Xander’s mind and he immediately shook his head to try and get rid of them.}}

Willow assessed the situation for a moment.  “I don’t think it’ll fit in there, Faith.” She made a little pouty face.

Faith sighed.  “Sure it will, Red.  You just have to wiggle it a little.”

{{<WHAT!?>  A few painful moments of silence passed then. . .}}

“Careful Will!”

”Take it easy with that stuff Red, you’re gonna get all sticky. . .here let me do it.”

Faith grabbed for the bottle and Willow pulled her arm away. . .She knocked into Buffy who in turn dropped what she was holding, lost her balance, grabbed onto Willow’s shoulder, who in turn grabbed on to Faith for balance and they all went tumbling to the floor.  This happened within a matter of two seconds.

“Uck. . .now see what you did.”  Faith commented from her position straddled across Willow’s torso.

”Don’t blame her Faith. . .you were being bossy and you made her nervous.  It’s not like she’s ever done this before.  “  Buffy said.  She adjusted Willow’s head briefly in her lap.

{{It was at this point that Xander burst through the door.  He had fully intended to scream and rant and rave on about tarnishing his best friends virtue, but he was stopped in his tracks by what he saw on the floor.}}

“What?. . . .How?. . . .I thought I heard you. . .I thought you three were doing. . . . .ugh.”  He slapped his forehead with his hand.

Buffy narrowed her eyebrows and looked up at him.  “How long have you been out there Xander?”

Faith turned around and smirked at him.  “Looks like we have a peeping tom on our hands, girls.”

Willow looked up at him.  “Were you spying on us Xander?”

He wasn’t sure what to say to them or what to do.  Shutting his gaping mouth was a good start.  He cleared his throat.  “Ahem. . .I uh. . .thought you guys were, well Buffy said she’d hold her steady and Faith. . .um, lick it off if it dripped and. . .”  He stopped speaking.  This was so not good.

“You thought we were. . . ?”  Buffy chuckled and looked at the position they were in. “Xander!  Is that all you think about? Faith and I were trying to convince Willow how good a homemade sundae would be with honey on it.  She’d never tried it before.  And when I said I’d hold ‘her’ steady, I meant the bowl you walking hormone!  Willow was taking way too long squeezing the honey onto the sundae and Faith tried to grab it and, well. . .we all came tumbling down like dominos.”

Willow finally caught on to what was on Xander’s mind.  “Xander!  You thought I. . with Buffy a-and Faith?!”  She grabbed the bottle of chocolate sauce and hurled it at him.  “I can’t believe you!”

The bottle opened in mid air and Xander stood there with chocolate dripping from his face.  He darted his tongue out and tasted it.  “Mmm. . .chocolaty.  Hey, does that mean that you guys would consider . . .”  He trailed off with an evil grin on his face.

They all grunted at him and threw various sundae supplies in his general direction.

“Fine, fine. . .it was just a thought.”  He threw his hands up in resignation.  “Ow, I’m gone.”  He rubbed his shoulder where the can of whipped cream just made contact.  “I’m gonna go home and let Anya clean me up.”  He walked out the door with a
wave.

“Can you believe that guy?”  Buffy looked at Faith then Willow who was still laying down in her lap.

“Yeah, really.”  Willow rolled her eyes.

Faith remained silent and thought about what Xander had thought was going on between them.  She turned back to Buffy and Willow and smiled.  Perhaps that was a train of thought she’d follow another day.