SPOILERS: This takes place after Angel loses his soul but before Becoming, which never happened in my 'verse. I will keep and discard Buffy lore as I see fit.

Part 17

Willow remained catatonic for two straight days. She didn't move, speak, or eat the entire time. She merely lay on the bed she shared with Angelus, her eyes lifeless as they stared at some distant point. As the third night dawned with no sign of change, Angelus began to worry. While Willow was ill, Angelus was uncharacteristically kind. He spent great portions of his time with her, looking after her, waiting for her to recover. He wanted to be with her when she revived. Angelus also refused to touch Willow, intimately, while she was in this state. Instead, he waited out her recovery, relieving his tension and taking out his anger through torture. His days and nights were spent alternating between his time with Willow and his time punishing his human doppelganger. Angelus took pleasure in letting his soul think Willow was alive and well, too busy fucking him to even remember Angel or his deceptions. The motional death and physical torture he brought to his soul helped him forget his worries and take pleasure in the pure release of his demon's ultimate desire to wound the one that had kept him prisoner for a century.

It was on that third night that Willow began to show signs of life beyond her continued breathing. Returning from a particularly satisfying session with Angel, Angelus made sure he washed away all traces of the blood he had shed, the expression on his face devoid of the cruelty that had marred it only a short while ago. Entering the room, Angelus froze at the sight of movement. Willow's head was rolling from side to side, her eyes closed with the lids fluttering. Relieved, Angelus moved to the side of the bed. Capturing her hand with his, his thumb traced reassuring circles in her palm as he murmured her name in hopes of fully rousing her. She began to mumble softly and he strained his ears in an attempt to make out her words. As he reached out a hand to her cheek, stilling her head's movement, Willow's eyelids flew open. Her eyes were trained on his face and for the first time in days she appeared to actually be starring at rather than through him.

Not waiting for her to speak, Angelus leaned down to press a rather chaste kiss to her lips. "I'm glad to see you're awake. You were beginning to have me worried, lover. I was beginning to wonder if you were ever coming back to me."

She stared at him, eyes wide, an expression of utter bewilderment and confusion darkening her features. She didn't fight his kiss, nor did she react to his choice of endearments. The look in her eyes was empty of recognition. Angelus wondered if perhaps permanent damage had been done to her psyche. If it turned out to be a result of the drugs Buffy had given her, he'd stake the bitch without a second thought. "Willow, are you alright? Say something if you understand me."

Willow shifted on the bed, lifting her slight body up so she was half sitting, half lounging against the pillows. She made a sound with her throat as if to speak, but all that came out was a strangled croaking. Handing her a glass of water he'd left on the nightstand earlier, Willow drank deeply, wincing slightly at the lukewarm temperature. Once the cup was drained, she spoke around the soreness of her throat. "I hear you." Willow paused, grappling for a name her mind wasn't supplying. Puzzled, she went on, ". but I don't understand."

Angelus frowned. "What don't you understand?"

Willow paused before answering. "Well, you called me a tree before and I'm not sure why. Also, I have no idea who you are or where I am, and to be quite honest, I'm not sure who I am either. Then you kissed me and I'm not even sure if I'm supposed to be kissing you- not that it wasn't nice, but, I mean, who are you? How do I know you're not some psychotic killer who's gonna rape and murder me. Not that you seem like one, or I think you are one, cause I don't think you are. You seem familiar but. I don't know. Everything's all fuzzy. My head, it hurts." Willow raised a hand to her temple, massaging the bone beneath her skin. She realized she was babbling and wondered if it was something she did often.

Angelus couldn't help but smile at his good fortune. He'd never considered the possibility of Willow repressing the emotional pain she'd suffered and thus losing her memory. The possibilities now before him seemed endless. She was virtually a blank canvas on which he could paint whatever picture of the current situation he wanted.

As Angelus contemplated his course of action, Willow stared at the vampire with curious eyes. In her mind, she was seeing him for the first time, and her appraising gaze quickly turned appreciative as she took in the dark good looks of the man before her. Her breath caught in her throat as her eyes lingered on the sculpted planes of his chest, clearly visible through the window afforded by his unbuttoned top. Willow had a sudden urge to run her hands up the wall of muscles, wondering if they were as hard and solid as they looked.

Angelus noticed her noticing him and chuckled darkly. "You can touch me, Willow, if you'd like. Everything I am belongs to you." Willow considered his words. "What do you mean?"

Angelus smiled a sexy little grin at her. "What I mean is, you and I are lovers. More than that, we're soulmates. Everything I have, everything I am is yours, and vice versa. You're free to explore me any way you desire."

Willow wondered at this bit of information. Skepticism colored her thoughts as her mind processed the idea that this beautiful man was her lover. She had no memory of him, and the idea that she could forget what should be the most important in her life frightened her. If he was her soulmate, how could she forget him so easily, so completely. Needing more answers to fill in the holes in her mind, Willow questioned him, "Is my name Willow?"

Angelus nodded. "Yes. Do you remember my name?"

Willow's forehead scrunched up as she ransacked her mind, trying hard to come up with the right answer. Failing, Willow shook her head, afraid he was going to be mad.

"That's okay. You have amnesia. It's not your fault you don't remember. I'm sure everything will come back to you in time. But for now, I'm Angelus."

Willow's eyes lit up as a sense of familiarity swept through her at the name. A single memory penetrated the dark fog of her mind, piercing the veil between the present and the oblivion of her past. "Angel!" She burst out, happy to have remembered something, even if it was only a name. When she tried to dig deeper and connect any specific feelings or memories to the name, she found her memories blocked.

Angelus's expression darkened at the name that escaped from her lips, though he fought to keep the smile on his face so he wouldn't alarm her with his reaction. "See, you haven't totally forgotten me. But I don't go by that nickname anymore. It's an old one."

Willow smiled innocently, "Why not. It's such a pretty name. I like it."

Angelus gritted his teeth, fighting for control. "I just don't. That name brings up bad memories."

Willow was immediately repentant. "I'm sorry, I'll call you Angelus then." The smile faded from her lips as she suddenly grew shy. "So, um, we're lovers?"

Angelus leaned down to kiss her again, a quick peck so he wouldn't frighten her. "That's right. We've been together for a year. You're best friend Buffy introduced us. It was love at first sight. We're even engaged." He lifted her hand up so she could see. Shrugging at the bare fingers, he explained. "You lost the ring the other night during your accident. But don't worry- I'll get you another one. All that matters is you're safe. I was afraid I had lost you for good." Angelus made his expression one of deep affection and sick fear, trying hard to impersonate the brooding looks of his souled half.

Willow melted under his show of concern. "I'm sorry I scared you." She reached out to lay a reassuring hand on his arm. "I'm okay now. Nothing really hurts except my head, and that's only when I try to remember things. I don't think I even have any bruises." Willow glanced down at her body, blushing as Angelus did the same. She hadn't realized she was dressed in nothing but a loose T-shirt that fell only part way down her thighs. From what he had told her about their relationship, she was sure he'd seen her in a lot less, but since she didn't remember, it was a lot easier for her to get embarrassed now.

Angelus seemed to take no notice in her discomfort over his gaze, which was openly lustful. Lying beside her so he could wrap his arms around her, Angelus whispered in her ear. "You can't imagine how much I've missed holding you like this. I feared I'd never be able to hold you again, never get to kiss you or hear your sweet voice again. The past few days have been hell on me. I want to make up for lost time, but I'd understand if you aren't ready." He added the last part as he felt her body tense as his arms went around her. The effect was immediate. She relaxed, moving closer to his body. His arms were strong, making her feel safe and protected. The look in his eyes made her feel beautiful and desired, as well as incredibly loved.

Willow tucked her head into the crook of his shoulder. "It's not that I don't want to." It was true, her body was responding to his, tingles of warmth spreading through her veins. "It's just that things are so confusing right now. There's so much I don't remember- so many blanks I need you to fill in. I want to reclaim my old life, but I'm afraid of what I don't remember. I'm sorry, but would you mind terribly if we waited awhile. Just till I know more about what's happened to me?"

Angelus was the epitome of understanding, kissing Willow gently. He knew, if played right, he could press the issue and get her to submit to his every whim, but something held him back. The victory would be so much sweeter if she was the one to come to him. "Of course I don't mind. I'd do anything for you. I love you." Relieved, Willow allowed Angelus to cup her head and kiss her again, this time more passionately. They stayed that way for awhile, kissing and taking comfort in the closeness of their bodies. Inside, Angelus crowed in triumph. He was well on his way to having exactly what he wanted.