Biding Time in Purgatory

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=90 BGCOLOR="#CC9900" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="047005a0dwnjzk.gif"> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cassies Writing"><U><B>home</B></U></A><B>     | </B><B> </B><B> </B><B>  </B><FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#FFCC66" FACE="Arial" ><B>Cassie's Writing</B></FONT></div> <div> <A HREF="id87.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="All Hallows Eve"><U><B>All Hallows' Eve</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id88.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Fall Camoflage"><U><B>Fall Camoflage</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id89.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Cyrus"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Cyrus</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id90.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Roxanne"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Roxanne</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id91.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Claude"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Claude</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id92.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Christmas Magick"><U><B>Christmas Magick</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id93.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Maggie"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Maggie</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id94.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Winters Deep Freeze"><U><B>Winter's Deep Freeze</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id95.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Sabrina"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Sabrina</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id96.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Frostbite"><U><B>Frostbite</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id97.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: The Collins Family"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  The Collins Family</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><B>Biding Time in Purgatory</B><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id99.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Quentin"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Quentin</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id100.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Family Secrets"><U><B>Family Secrets</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id102.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Vortex"><U><B>Vortex</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id101.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Spring Whirlwind"><U><B>Spring Whirlwind</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id103.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Den of Vipers"><U><B>Den of Vipers</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id104.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Angelique"><U><B>Puzzle Pieces:  Angelique</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id105.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Converging Forces"><U><B>Converging Forces</B></U></A><B>   |   </B><A HREF="id106.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Flames of Purification"><U><B>Flames of Purification</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id85.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Adam in Parallel Time"><U><B>Adam in Parallel Time</B></U></A></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=210 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <B>Biding Time in Purgatory</B></div> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" height=390 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div>      There was a false spring thaw in the air on that first day of March when Steve drove Adam and Admiral Stuart to LaGuardia airport to pick up Lance Corporal Randall Drew.  Admiral Stuart still had friends and contacts in the military service.  The young man was in a hospital in Berlin the last few weeks of February; then he'd been flown into Dulles Airport in Washington, D.C.  Adam had spoken to the young man tentatively the night before; Roxanne's brother had sounded confused and lost.  Adam felt sorry for Randy, remembering how confused and lost he'd felt when he'd arrived in this world.  Randy couldn't seem to absorb what everyone was telling him about his sister.  "Look," he asked Adam, "how can she be missing?  This is the United fucking States, man!"</div> <div>      Adam was tempted to tell Randy about Claude North.  He really wanted and needed an ally who felt strongly about finding Roxanne.  Tony Peterson might know what he was doing, but he probably really only cared because Quentin was paying him.  There was something about the way the Randy's voice rose and trembled that caused Adam to hesitate.  He thought it would be better to see him in person.  Both Randy and Adam allowed Admiral Stuart to make all the arrangements.  Randy seemed too dazed to take active part in making plans.  When Adam offered the use of his spare room Randy accepted with the resignation of one who feels his life is out of his hands.  Adam thought he could sympathize with how Randy felt.  He remembered his early days with Professor Stokes.  As kind as the professor had been, Adam had felt like a dreamwalker, allowing Stokes to make decisions for him because it was the easiest course to take.</div> <div>      Adam called Cyrus in Collinsport to talk about Randy's arrival and was surprised that Cyrus didn't know about it.  Cyrus was shocked.  "Did Sabrina know?" Cyrus demanded.  He sounded a little suspicious.     </div> <div> Adam wasn't sure.  He thought Mrs. Stuart had talked to Sabrina about it.  He felt uneasy about it.  "Will you come down and see us?" he asked.</div> <div> Cyrus hesitated.  "I don't see what good it would do, to be honest with you.  I don't know him."</div> <div> "But perhaps he knows something about Claude North.  If you were to tell him-"</div> <div> "Adam, Adam," Cyrus interrupted, talking to him as if he were a small child.  "You have to remember that Roxanne's brother has been through a terrible ordeal.  He may not be able to handle any of this right now.  Why don't we wait and see what happens when he gets here?"</div> <div> <I>You just don't want to see him,</I> Adam thought resentfully.  He felt guilty for feeling suspicious about his friend, but there were too many odd things going on related to Cyrus.  He tried to remember where Cyrus had been born.  Was it New York?  He thought maybe it was-the private school that Cyrus and Quentin had attended wasn't far away.  In fact, the more Adam remembered the first trip to Long Island, the more he realized how familiar it all seemed to Cyrus.  Even Quentin had seemed to know his way around somewhat-as if he'd been there before.</div> <div> He realized that Cyrus was speaking again, his voice tense.  "Has Mr. Peterson been able to find out anything for you?"</div> <div> "Not yet," Adam answered truthfully.  It didn't seem necessary to lie to Cyrus-yet.  Adam felt a little guilty for what he was going to do next-call Sabrina.  He wanted to find out if Sabrina knew that Roxanne's brother had been found and, if she did, why she hadn't told Cyrus.</div> <div> "I didn't think it was important," Sabrina sounded surprised but cautious when Adam asked her about it.  She hesitated and then asked, "Did Cyrus seem upset?"</div> <div> "Surprised," Adam answered truthfully.  "He asked if you knew."</div> <div> "What did you say?"</div> <div> "That I didn't know."</div> <div> "Thank you, Adam," Sabrina said softly, sounding relieved.</div> <div> Adam felt confused and worried.  "Sabrina, I really didn't know."  He wanted to ask her what was wrong but felt suddenly afraid.  After an uncomfortable silence, he asked, "Sabrina, where does Dr. Cyrus come from?"</div> <div> "Stonybrook," Sabrina answered flatly.</div> <div> Adam remembered an exit for Stonybrook on the Long Island Expressway.  "That is here?  On Long Island?"  His voice rose a little with excitement.</div> <div> "Yes," Sabrina answered in that same odd voice.  "His parents and brother live there still.  His father has a church there.  I don't think you should visit."</div> <div> "Why?"</div> <div> "I don't know.  Cyrus doesn't see his parents or his family.  He won't tell me why."</div> <div> <I>How odd,</I> Adam thought.  <I>Why would someone not want to see his family?</I>  "They had a fight?" he asked, thinking that maybe Cyrus was from a family like the Collinses.</div> <div> "Something like that," Sabrina agreed.</div> <div> "Where did Cyrus and Quentin go to school?"</div> <div> "It's not far.  It's near Setauket-a very pretty school.  I can tell you how to get there if you like.  It's not that far from Brightwaters."</div> <div> "All right," Adam agreed.   He was interested in seeing the school that Cyrus and Quentin had attended as boys.  He was also curious about Cyrus' family and why Cyrus didn't want to see them.  He thought perhaps they might be in the phone book.  He realized that he was becoming dishonest-if that was the right word for it.  He didn't intend to tell Cyrus or Sabrina about his plans.</div> <div> Mrs. Stuart stayed behind to supervise the preparations for the arrival of Roxanne's brother.  Adam thought the Stuarts were being very kind to strangers.  He was learning that theirs was not a typical response.  He was still ingenuous enough to ask Admiral Stuart about it.  The admiral was quiet for a moment, then tried to explain how he felt.  He still had difficulty expressing himself exactly in the manner he wanted to and he still became frustrated to the point of tears when he failed.  "He is a hero," the admiral said slowly.  "He didn't run.  He didn't say no.  He went."</div> <div> "I don't understand."  Adam was puzzled.</div> <div> "Not all who are called go," the admiral explained.  When he realized that Adam still didn't understand, he began searching for the words to explain.  "You know-the lottery.  You know-the post office."  He was becoming frustrated.</div> <div> "Hey, didn't you have to fill out a draft card at the post office?" Steve asked from the front seat. Uh-oh, Adam thought.  He had no idea what they were talking about.  Fortunately, Steve was a talker.  "I went down right on my 18th birthday.  When my number come up, it was high.  Did you have a high number too?"</div> <div> "Yes," Adam ventured, hoping he was guessing at the right answer.</div> <div> "No chicken foot!" the admiral exclaimed approvingly.</div> <div> Looking up in the rearview mirror, Steve could see Adam's confusion.  He quickly held his fingers up in a "V".  "Peace, man," he said, hoping Adam would get it.</div> <div> "No, not that!" the admiral objected. "That was a sign of honor-before. V-Victory."</div> <div> None of it made any sense.  Adam wished he could trust Steve enough to ask him about it later, but he was afraid Steve would become suspicious.  It seemed to be something that Adam should be fully aware of.  He began to get some understanding at the airport.  There were people of all types milling around.  Some people were dressed in suits and others were dressed casually.  Still others were dressed in wild, brightly colored clothes.  They had very long hair and several carried signs.  The admiral growled his disapproval.  "Chicken foot!" he said contemptuously.</div> <div> Adam wished he knew what the admiral meant.  Some of the signs said, "Hell no, we won't go" and others said, "Make love, not war."  Still others had symbols on them.  Most of the symbols were circles with a single line that split into three branches, or legs.  Adam wanted to ask Steve what they were doing, but he hesitated.  He thought he should have spent more of his time watching the news and watching less comedy shows.  Perhaps he would start this evening.  </div> <div> Randy's flight arrived, and the three men moved to the gate from which he would arrive.  The admiral leaned heavily on his cane with both hands.  Steve held up a cardboard sign with the name Randall Drew inked on it as the passengers from the plane started exiting.  Adam, who was far taller than everyone else, was sure he saw Randy coming, a very thin young man in a dress uniform, looking lost and confused.  </div> <div> The young man saw the sign, and he looked relieved.  He was coming in their direction when suddenly some of the oddly dressed people surged forward, screaming, "Baby killer!  War monger!"  They were surrounding Randy, who stood still, frozen and unmoving.  The admiral shouted in protest when one of the women spat into the young man's face.  Adam was enraged by what had happened.  He waded into the crowd and began flinging the young men aside. He found himself face to face with the woman who had spat on Randy.  "Why did you do that?" he yelled at her.  </div> <div> "It's an immoral war! They're over there killing innocent civilians, man-and that means babies, too!" the woman screamed back.</div> <div> Security guards surrounded them now.  "Hey, cool it, man!" someone was saying.  "It's not this guy, it's the government."  Adam noticed that the guards were grabbing the strangely clothed young people, handling them roughly, pushing and shoving them out of the way.</div> <div> "Are you all right, sir?" a guard was asking Randy, who only stood still, white with shock.  There was still spit on the side of his face.  The guard gently pressed a handkerchief into Randy's hand, but he didn't move to clean himself up.  He looked stunned.</div> <div> The admiral and Steve reached them.  It was the admiral who took the handkerchief from Randy and wiped his face gently.  "Let's get the hell out of here," he said to Steve.</div> <div> It was a bad beginning, Adam thought.  He moved protectively to Randy's side, guiding him along.  "I am Adam Knight.  I talked to you.  I am sorry about what happened."</div> <div> "I don't get it," Randy mumbled.  He didn't say anything else until after they had all gotten into the car.  "They all shot at me.  I never shot no one," he muttered and then fell silent again.</div> <div> "You don't worry," the admiral said gruffly.  "We know you didn't."</div> <div> Steve drove them to the big house in Brightwaters where Mrs. Stuart was waiting with a hot meal.  Randy looked like a sleepwalker, walking slowly and looking around at everything with seeming indifference.  Mrs. Stuart was perceptive enough to sense that Randy was ill at ease and so she had the cook set the small kitchen table so that Randy could eat alone.  The young man seemed very relieved and indicated he wanted Adam to join him.  The admiral seemed confused about the rearrangement of plans; he'd probably expected to have a long talk with Randy about his adventures and left the kitchen reluctantly when Mrs. Stuart urged him to come shopping with her.</div> <div> "I feel weird here," Randy began as he ate.  He seemed to be very hungry and had a starved look about him, Adam thought.  His cheeks were very hollow.</div> <div> "I felt weird at first too.  It's not my home," Adam agreed.  "But the Stuarts are very nice people."</div> <div> "I'll say.  I wouldn't have had any other place to go, y'know?  Nobody left-but Roxanne."  Randy got a brooding look on his face.  "I had a girl-she wrote me a letter.   I got it in the hospital in Germany.  She married someone else."</div> <div> "I'm sorry," Adam said sympathetically.</div> <div> Randy shrugged.  "I hadn't seen her in years.  Not since-well-" He stopped talking, his brows furrowing.  He looked over at Adam.  "So you dig my sister, huh?"</div> <div> "Dig?" Adam repeated, blankly.</div> <div> "You like her?"</div> <div> "No, I love her.  I want to marry her."</div> <div> "Oh-that's good, I guess."  Randy looked around the kitchen, then back at Adam.  "Where do you think she went?"</div> <div> "I'm not sure.  There is a detective who is looking for her."</div> <div> "Yeah-what happened?" Now that they were together, Adam decided to tell the story.  As soon as he said `Claude North' he saw Randy's eyes light up with recognition.  For a long time Randy didn't say anything.  Then he said, "I always thought she was gonna marry Claude, y'know?"</div> <div> Adam felt his heart sink a little in dismay.  Maybe Randy didn't believe Roxanne had been stolen away either.  "They were engaged?"</div> <div> "In a way.  They were together, on, off, on, off.  Claude, he wanted to run things.  Roxanne's not like that.  She doesn't like to be told what to do.  But she and Claude had this thing between them-I dunno, I didn't understand it."</div> <div> "How do you know Claude?" Adam asked.</div> <div> "He lived down the street from us.  Only he went to private school in Setauket-not to public school like my sister and me."</div> <div> "He went to school-where?" Adam was suddenly alert, watching Randy carefully.</div> <div> Randy noticed.  "Stonybrook-it's a prep school.  Why?"</div> <div> "That sounds like the school my friends went to," Adam mused, feeling adrenaline pumping through his system.  "You mean that you and Roxanne and Claude North lived here too?"</div> <div> "Yeah.  Who are you friends?"</div> <div> "Cyrus Longworth?  Quentin Collins?"</div> <div> Randy was shaking his head.  "I did hear of a Bible thumper name of Darrius Longworth.   He has his own church."</div> <div> That could be Cyrus' father, Adam thought. "Have you been there?"</div> <div> Randy shrugged and shook his head, no.  "Never was very interested in churches."</div> <div>  "Did you like Claude?"  Adam asked hesitantly.</div> <div> Randy made a sound of contempt.  "I hated the little prick!  He has this way of looking at you-like he's king of the world or something.  Don't get in his way."</div> <div> "I think he is dangerous," Adam ventured.  "How long has it been since you last saw him?"</div> <div> Randy shook his head.  "Just before I left for Nam.   That's been years, though.  I just assumed all this time that Roxanne finally married him."  He looked at Adam closely.  "Never would've imagined otherwise.  So what does this detective say?"</div> <div> Adam told Randy everything Peterson had told him.  Roxanne's brother looked grim but said nothing.  Finally, Adam asked if he wanted to get some rest.  Nodding, the young man stood up.  He was painfully thin and looked much older than he really was, Adam thought.   He took Randy back to the cottage and showed to the larger of the two bedrooms.  Adam still could not bring himself to sleep alone in the double bed although he would have been more comfortable there.  Randy flung himself on the bed, on his back, staring up at the ceiling.  He didn't say another word.</div> <bR> <div> Adam made a new appointment to have a second surgery done by Dr. Hargrove.  He didn't really want to do it and agreed only with the urgings of Admiral Stewart, Cyrus, and Tony Peterson.  Peterson warned Adam that he really shouldn't come back to Collinsport at all because Hoffman had recognized him.   Randy wasn't ready to be of much use, and Adam found himself frustrated and restless.  He thought he might as well go ahead with the surgery then.  </div> <div> Randy had strange nightmares, and it was almost a relief to go into the hospital for a few days.  He would scream in another language in the middle of the night.  The first time Adam had attempted to wake him, Randy reacted by trying to strangle him.  Adam was much stronger and easily pulled Randy's hands away.  The young man was wild-eyed and thrashed for several minutes before he realized where he was.  He didn't want to talk about where he thought he was, or what he'd been dreaming about.</div> <div> The second surgery was much easier and less painful for Adam, and Dr. Hargrove only wanted him to stay in the hospital a few days.  Cyrus and Sabrina came down to be with him when he woke up from surgery; that was the worst day and when he needed the most comfort and attention.  Sabrina sat by his side all afternoon; Cyrus paced a lot and seemed eager to go and get pain medication whenever it was necessary.  He seemed uneasy although he told Adam that when he recovered from this surgery, no one would see the scars on his face at all anymore.  "Have you heard from Tony?" Cyrus asked nervously.</div> <div> "No," Adam answered gloomily.  He was irritated at Cyrus' reaction.  He was sure that his friend was relieved.</div> <div> "I have to go back tonight-some items need my attention," Cyrus explained.  "Sabrina is going to stay on Long Island with her parents.  She'll be here to see you tomorrow." Adam nodded dully.  Seeing his expression, Cyrus cleared his throat and went on, "You know, Adam, Sabrina and I were talking to Admiral Stuart about your plans.  He would be happy to have you continue to stay in the cottage, help out part-time, and go to night school."</div> <div> "Night school?" Adam repeated blankly.  He remembered talking about it before but hadn't given it any consideration in a long time.</div> <div> "Yes, you can get into a marine mechanics class when you've recovered," Cyrus went on in an encouraging tone.  "It is a self-paced class, which means it doesn't really matter when you start.  You learn as you go.  It's not very far from where the Stuarts live either, especially now that you can drive a car.  And perhaps Corporal Drew would be interested too-"</div> <div> "Why would he be interested?"  Adam interrupted.  He was beginning to feel a little suspicious.</div> <div> "Well, I didn't know his background," Cyrus hedged.  "He needs to think about doing something, doesn't he?  Now that he's back?"</div> <div> "I guess," Adam agreed.  He hadn't really had a chance to talk to Randy much about that.  He had no idea what Randy did for a living.  Cyrus decided to take his leave then and return to Collinsport.  As Adam shook his friend's hand, he sadly wondered if this wasn't an attempt on Cyrus' part to keep Roxanne's brother and himself occupied-too busy to look for Roxanne.</div> <div> The next afternoon, Adam was surprised to see Randy poke his head in the door.  "You up for company, man?" he asked.</div> <div> "Yes," Adam said, glad for the company.  Randy came in hesitantly.  He now looked like one of the strangely dressed people who'd been at the airport.  He was wearing jeans, a brightly colored shirt and had tied a red bandanna around his head.  Before Adam could say anything about his appearance, Randy beckoned to someone with his hand.</div> <div> "It's all right, he's feeling okay," Randy was saying.  He looked at Adam.  "I met a chick.  I brought her along."</div> <div> "That's all right," Adam began but he froze when he saw who the "chick" was.  She froze in the doorway as well.</div> <div> "My God!" Alexis Stokes exclaimed.  "What a small world!"</div> <div> "Oh, you know each other?" Randy asked, looking non-plussed.</div> <div> "We met-briefly," Alexis said, looking uncomfortable.  "I didn't realize you were in New York."</div> <div> "For the surgery, yes," Adam said faintly, also extremely uncomfortable.  "How was your show?"</div> <div> "Successful, thank you.  I'm having another-here."</div> <div> "That's where I met the lady, man-in the Village," Randy put in.</div> <div> Adam couldn't think of anything to say.  Alexis came into the room reluctantly; it was obvious she couldn't think of a way to get out of it.  Randy pulled two chairs up for them to sit on.  He seemed very interested in Alexis Stokes, Adam thought with dismay.</div> <div> "How do you two know each other?" Alexis was asking.</div> <div> "He digs my sister," Randy explained.  "The one who is missing."</div> <div> Adam nearly groaned aloud.  He didn't want Alexis to know about Roxanne-he wasn't sure why.  "Missing?"  Alexis' voice shot up. She looked at Adam.</div> <div> "She disappeared from this hospital in fact," Adam finally said, managing to make Alexis feel even more awkward and uncomfortable.  He didn't mean to do it; he just didn't know how to lie.  "We are trying to find her."</div> <div> "Is that why you were going north when we first met?" Alexis asked.</div> <div> "Well, yes," Adam said reluctantly.</div> <div> "Have you heard from Quentin?"</div> <div> "Not yet.  I don't think he will be back until the end of March."  Adam closed his eyes wearily, wondering how Randy's new friendship with Alexis would complicate the search for Roxanne.</div> <div> "He's tired," Alexis noted.  "We should go."</div> <div> "Okay, man, don't wanna wear you out.  I just wanted to stop by and say hi.  I'll come back to see you again tomorrow-and then you're going back there, right?"  Randy asked.</div> <div> "There?"</div> <div> "Your place-you know.  With the Stuarts."</div> <div> "Oh, yes, there.  Yes, aren't you going back today?"</div> <div> Randy and Alexis exchanged quick glances, and Adam wanted to groan again.  "It depends," Randy answered finally.</div> <div> Adam closed his eyes again, feeling overwhelmed.  "All right.  Thank you for coming to see me.  I will see you again tomorrow."</div> <div> "Sure, sure, man.  Get some rest, all right?"</div> <div> Adam kept his eyes closed until he was sure they were both gone.  Then he opened them, wondering what he would do now.</div> <bR> <div> What he ended up doing for the next several weeks was enter the night school program, learning marine mechanics.  To his surprise, Randy came along with him.  Randy confided that he was never much of a student, which was why he'd lost his draft deferment.  He'd flunked out of school his first semester, he explained.  Randy and Adam both seemed to have a natural feel for engines and worked well together.  Otherwise, there were many things that Randy did that Adam just did not understand.</div> <div> He smoked a funny kind of cigarette that made his speech slow.  Sometimes he would roll the cigarettes in the kitchen as Adam cooked.  He tried to share them with Adam a few times but eventually gave up.  Adam didn't like the choking sensation he felt when he inhaled the stuff.  He didn't want to hold the smoke inside as Randy advised him to do.  They didn't make him feel relaxed or happy.  Smoking pot was just a waste of his time, Adam felt. Randy also sometimes took pills and sometimes injected himself with a needle.  "Do you have diabetes?" Adam asked curiously once, watching as Randy lit a match under a spoon filled with white powder.</div> <div> "Naw, man, why?" Randy held the match under the spoon under the powder had become a liquid.  He filled a syringe with the liquid.</div> <div> "Some of the clients at Rushmore have diabetes," Adam explained, watching as Randy tied a length of rubber tubing around his arm, thumping at his elbow with the fingers of his free hand.  "I have never seen them give themselves shots like that, though."</div> <div> Randy laughed.  "Is that what you think, man?  That this is insulin?"  He picked up the syringe and quickly injected it into a vein in his elbow.  Almost immediately, he smiled slowly, his eyes closed, and his head nodded slowly.</div> <div> "What is it then?" Adam asked.</div> <div> "Heaven," Randy said, very softly.  "Wanna try it?"</div> <div> "No needles!" Adam objected.  "I always hated them."</div> <div> "Doesn't hurt," Randy replied, in that odd voice.  "I could just pop it under your skin."</div> <div> Adam looked at Randy doubtfully.  He seemed to be almost asleep.  Adam didn't think he wanted to be like that, but he didn't want to offend Randy.  "No, thank you, not this time," he said politely.  He wondered what that stuff was.  He noticed that it also seemed to blunt Randy's feelings.  He didn't worry as much about Roxanne when he smoked or took the pills or gave himself needles.</div> <div> Adam chafed impatiently.  He wanted to go to Collinsport and just look around.  Tony Peterson and Cyrus both said no.  Adam hoped that Randy might argue with them; instead, Randy had smoked one of his cigarettes and taken some red pills.  After that, he seemed to be in his own world.  "Where did you get those things?" Adam asked irritably.  He wished he could flush it all down the toilet-maybe then Randy would worry about his sister again and try to find her.</div> <div> "You are a naif, aren't you, my friend?" Randy asked with a gentle grin.  There was no malice in his voice.  "Well, I tellya, Adam, I was too-before I went to Nam.  I didn't know about none of this shit, except the pot.  Tried the pot.  But when you go out in the country-man, you gotta have this shit to keep you from losin your mind."</div> <div> "In the country?  Vietnam?"</div> <div> "Yeah-Vietfuckingnam. You know what, there is a hell.  My friend, it's right here on earth, and it's called Vietfuckingnam."</div> <div> "Why did you go there, Randy?"</div> <div> "Because I flunked out and I hadda go.  My deferment wasn't any good no more.  I was too scared to burn up my draft card like them other guys.  I didn't want to run to Canada and leave everything behind.  But you know what?  If I had to do it again, I'd go to Canada in a New York minute."</div> <div> "For a long time, Roxanne didn't know where you were."</div> <div> "I was in a tiger cage, Adam."</div> <div> "Tiger cage?  What's that?"</div> <div>  Finally, Randy showed some reaction.  He sat bolt upright, his eyes hard and cold. "Look, forget Nam.  Let's just cool it, huh?"</div> <div> Cool it?  It was already cold outside, Adam thought.  He was sure this was another expression he just didn't understand.  He thought he would like to see the town where Roxanne and Randy had grown up.  When he asked, Randy gave him directions.  He didn't want to go--he just wanted to "hang out".  Disappointed, Adam got into the borrowed Ford Galaxy and started east.  After a few miles, he realized he'd become confused.  He'd forgotten when to get off and head north.  He found himself heading for Oakdale, and thought he could remember the way to Maggie's sister's house.  What was her name?  Jennifer!  Maybe she could help him find the right town.</div> <div> He managed to find the split-level house again, much to his relief.  He felt a little silly arriving unannounced, but Jennifer seemed very happy to see him.  "Well, how are you?" she asked, inviting him in.  "Get yourself a girl yet?"</div> <div> "No," he answered morosely.  "I haven't given up looking for Roxanne."</div> <div> Jennifer looked at him with pity.  "You've got it bad, doncha, you poor thing?   Can I get you a-what was it you like?  Pepsi?"</div> <div> Adam smiled, pleased that she remembered.  "Yes, but actually I was hoping you could help me."</div> <div> Now Jennifer seemed pleased.  She actually blushed.  "Really?  How can I help you?"</div> <div> "I am looking for a place, and I became lost."</div> <div> "Yeah?  I know Long Island real good-like the back of my hand.  Whatcha looking for?"</div> <div> "A town called Setauket and a school called Stonybrook."</div> <div> "Well, I can getcha to Setauket, no problem.  Never heard of the school though-but wait!"  She dashed up the stairs and into her living room.  "I've got a Hagstrom's of Suffolk, I'll betcha we can find it!"  She seemed very animated and enthusiastic.  Adam followed her up the stairs.  There was a playpen in the living room, and the baby was rolling from side to side, gurgling.  Adam wondered what a Hagstrom's was and realized it was a map when he saw Jennifer looking in a large paperback book with streets, towns, and highways.  "Got it!  It's right outside of Setauket, this school!"  She looked at Adam.  "So-you wanna go?"</div> <div> Adam smiled again with relief.  She was going to come along and show him.  "Yes, please," he said.</div> <div> "Great!" Jennifer was definitely excited by the prospect of getting out.  "I've been soooo bored!  Just let me get Jimmy and me ready and we'll go!"</div> <div> "Your husband is playing golf again?"</div> <div> Jennifer made a face.  "What else?"  She scurried around, gathering up warm outer clothing for the baby.  She dressed him and then retrieved her coat.  "Come on-let's go!"  Adam was glad to have her along.  He realized he never would have found either place without her.  She directed him until they came to the end of what she called Nichols Road.  "Right or left?" she asked.  "Right goes to Setauket.  Left goes to the school."</div> <div> "I don't know," Adam said, stumped.</div> <div> "Well, where do you wanna go in Setauket?"</div> <div> Adam realized he didn't know where Randy and Roxanne had lived.  "I didn't get the address.  Why don't we go to the school?"</div> <div> "Go left, then," Jennifer directed.</div> <div> Adam followed her directions and they drove onto the campus of the school.  "It's pretty here," Adam exclaimed.</div> <div> "Not very big, but private schools usually aren't.  Who went here?"</div> <div> "Quentin and Cyrus."</div> <div> "<I>Quentin?</I>  He came <I>here</I>?" Jennifer gasped.  "Damn!  What a small world!"</div> <div> "Indeed," Adam agreed.  "Would you like to walk?"</div> <div> "Why not?  I don't think many people will be around on a Saturday," Jennifer said agreeably.  Adam parked near the main building, and they got out with the baby and began to walk along the grounds.  </div> <div> It felt like a good place, Adam thought.  He thought Quentin and Cyrus must have been happy here.  The dormitories looked like large country homes.  They met an instructor out for a stroll who stopped to tell them about the school.  It had been founded in the 1920s with the motto "Character before Career".  He spoke of how important character was to the individual and that virtue and integrity were particularly emphasized.  He also spoke proudly of the sports programs at the school.  "Hockey?" Adam asked.</div> <div> "Oh, dear, no, not hockey," the teacher laughed.  "The boys do play street hockey when they can get away with it.  We have an excellent sailing program here thanks to our proximity to the Stony Brook and Port Jefferson harbors we have an advantage, you see.  Of course, I am a bit blind in that area-I am the sailing coach."</div> <div> "I like to sail," Jennifer said cheerily.</div> <div> "I would like to learn," Adam said.  He looked at the teacher; he seemed to be close in age to Admiral Stuart.  "I wonder if you remember my friends.  They came to school here."</div> <div> "Well," the teacher laughed, "I've taught so many-some of them have been outstanding, I must say though.  Tell me their names."</div> <div> "Quentin Collins," Jennifer said immediately.</div> <div> "Ah, yes!  I remember that boy well.  Very bright, very friendly young man-natural born leader.  Natural born sailor."</div> <div> "He was in your sailing program?"  Adam asked.</div> <div> "And glad I was of it, too.  That boy knows how to handle a ship, he does," the teacher said.  "So!  I often wondered what became of him.  I know he went to one of our best Ivy League schools-our graduates do, you know."</div> <div> "Yes?"  Adam didn't know what an Ivy League school was but assumed it was something wonderful.  "He is married-on his honeymoon."</div> <div> "Splendid!"  The teacher was genuinely glad.  "That boy was a top student.  Better yet, he was likeable.  Sometimes a student can be very bright and yet be a thoroughly detestable human being.  Not Quentin.  Well!  And he's president of his own corporation, I've no doubt?"</div> <div> "Yes, he runs his family's business," Jennifer agreed.  "It's my sister he married."</div> <div> "She must be special too, then," the teacher said pleasantly.  </div> <div> Adam noted the odd expression that briefly crossed Jennifer's face before he asked, "Did you know Cyrus Longworth?"</div> <div> The teacher thought for a moment.  "The name is familiar, and I can see his face.  Quentin's friend?"</div> <div> "Yes."</div> <div> "All right.  Yes, a quiet lad. I remember he struck me as a boy who had a calling to serve-a teacher, perhaps, or a minister.  Definitely not a sailor, although he tried.  He got seasick." The teacher laughed.  "He was a swimmer."</div> <div> "He is a doctor now," Adam said.</div> <div> "Well, good for him!" the teacher exclaimed.  "I wouldn't have expected that-doctors are usually aggressive, assertive types, and the boy never impressed me that way."</div> <div> "Claude North?"</div> <div> The teacher frowned.  Adam wasn't sure if it was because of an unpleasant memory or because he was trying to remember.  He shook his head.  "I'm afraid not-I don't remember him," he said finally.  "If you'll excuse me, I've enjoyed our chat but I'm late for an appointment.  Enjoy your visit."  He walked off abruptly.</div> <div> "Huh!" Jennifer exclaimed, surprised.  "Claude North left a bad taste in his mouth, didn't he?"</div> <div> "He has that effect on everyone, it would seem," Adam answered, feeling a spasm of anxiety pass through him.   </div> <div> "So who is this Claude North?  He's not from Collinsport, is he?"</div> <div> "No, he lived in Setauket." Disturbed now, Adam suggested they walk around the grounds a little.  He saw groups of young people walking on the grounds.  Some of the boys played a game of football on the field.</div> <div> "It's getting cold," Jennifer said finally, and they returned to the car.  Adam drove Jennifer home.  "Why don't you come in for that Pepsi now?" she asked when they had pulled up to the house.  Adam agreed.  He wasn't in a real rush to get back to his cottage; Randy was probably sound asleep.  </div> <div> Adam sat in the living room while Jennifer took Jimmy, who was sound asleep, to his room in the back of the house.  She went into the kitchen and soon returned with two glasses of soda.  "Are you sure you wouldn't like a little something added?" she asked.  She had a bottle of Seagram's and poured a shot into her glass.</div> <div> "No, thank you," Adam said.  He didn't like the taste of liquor either.  It made him ill.</div> <div> "That's okay."  Jennifer set her bottle on the table.  She sipped slowly at her mixed drink.  "I try not to drink too much."</div> <div> "That's a good idea," Adam agreed.  He wondered what Jennifer meant.</div> <div> "Did you see everything you wanted to see?" Jennifer asked, having another sip of her drink.</div> <div> "I saw the school, but I would like to find a house in Setauket."</div> <div> "If you can get the address, I'd be glad to go out there with you," Jennifer offered.</div> <div> "Thank you.  I'd like the company."</div> <div> Jennifer slid closer to him on the sofa.  "I would, too."  She put a hand on Adam's arm.  "You're a very good looking man, did you know that?" Adam gulped, surprised, and looked at Jennifer with wide eyes.  She laughed.  "You're cute, too.  You have pretty eyes, especially when they get big like that.  You're really nice, too-not like most guys.  I can tell you're sensitive."  Her fingers began to move along Adam's arm, moving toward his shoulder.  Jennifer moved still closer to him.</div> <div> "Jennifer-" Adam began, flushing with embarrassment.  Her touch had roused him, and he knew that was a wrong thing because she was married to another man.</div> <div> "Adam, I'm so lonely," Jennifer whispered.  "It's all right.  My husband doesn't care about me.  If he cared about me, he wouldn't leave me alone so much.  You're lonely, too.  I know you are.  Can't we help each other?"</div> <div> "H-How can we h-help each other?" Adam stuttered.</div> <div> "You see what I mean?  You're so sweet.  You'd never hurt anyone because you're so innocent.  You've been hurt, though, and so have I."  She was very, very close now.  She kissed Adam, very softly, on the lips.  He was shocked and nearly leaped up in protest.  He didn't move, though, because of the pleading look on her face.  The next time she kissed him, he found himself kissing her back.  As her hand moved to the back of his neck, he found his arms going around her.  Her lips tasted sweet, like the Pepsi, and also bitter like the whiskey.  He could smell her hair-a light, spicy fragrance that roused him still further.  Now she was moving the other way, lying back, and she was pulling him down with her willingly.</div> <bR> <div> Adam gave Jennifer a kiss and a hug at the door, smiled at her, and hurried away.  He didn't want her to know that he felt as if he was going to throw up.  He was guilt-ridden and ashamed.  The pleasure and release he had felt with Jennifer had combined with the guilt and loneliness he felt over Roxanne.  He drove around the block from the house and pulled over, trembling.  Oh Roxanne, no, what have I done? He thought, filled with the agony of remorse.  If he felt he could've gotten away with it, he would've begun hitting himself in the face, something Stokes had finally persuaded him to stop doing.  He'd only done it once since-the day Roxanne disappeared.  </div> <div> He really was going to be sick.  He opened the car door and vomited into the street.  Looking around guiltily, he realized to his relief that no one was around.  He shut the door, wiping his mouth on his coat sleeve.  He was still trembling and fought to get his body under control.  It was just that we both were so lonely.  If we weren't so lonely, we never would have done it, he thought.  He wondered if she felt as badly as he did and suspected she did not.  Perhaps that was because she was not as much in love with her husband as he was with Roxanne.  When his hands had stopped trembling so that he could handle the keys, he started the car again and drove back to Brightwaters.  I can't see her again, he realized.</div> <div> As he pulled into the driveway, a new horrifying thought intruded into his mind: he would have to see her again!  She was Maggie's sister!  He groaned.  He got out of the car, overlooking the yellow Camaro in the driveway.  He opened the door to the cottage and went in, stumbling up the stairs.  As he reached the top of the stairs, he heard a muffled noise-it sounded like the noises he and Jennifer had been making.  </div> <div> He turned his head to the right-he could see right into the larger bedroom.  Randy was lying on his back on the double bed, his head thrown back on the pillow.  A slim, naked woman with long blonde hair was sitting on top of him, her back toward Adam, slowly rocking.  Randy turned his head toward the door.  He and Adam looked at each other, and Randy slowly winked.  Adam's hair nearly stood on end as he realized that the blonde woman was Alexis Stokes.  He nearly fell down the stairs backing up and rushing to get out of the house again.  As he ran through the living room, he could hear Randy saying, "It's nothing, baby, don't worry about it!"</div> <div> Adam got back into his car as quickly as he could, backed out of the driveway, and drove to Jones Beach.  He'd been there enough times that he could find it without any trouble at all.  His heart was heavy with misgivings.  Why would Alexis Stokes come all the way out here?  Did she really find Randy Drew so attractive?  He had a very bad feeling about it.  He had a feeling, though, that Randy would be very willing to talk about it.  That was good because Adam wanted to make sure that Alexis was going to pose no danger to the investigation or to Roxanne.  He'd walked almost an hour before he realized how cold he was.  By the time he found the little snack bar, his face and hands were completely numb.</div> <bR> <div> Alexis was gone when Adam got back, and he was immensely relieved.  "No big deal," Randy said.  "She's cool.  She's an artist.  We met in the Village, we dug each other, did our thing a coupla times and that's that.  We just happened to dig each other and so-let nature take its course."</div> <div> "She didn't ask you many questions about Roxanne or Tony Peterson?" Adam worried.</div> <div> "Nah, not at all man.  It's cool.  What are you worried about, anyway?"</div> <div> "I don't know."  Adam couldn't put his finger on it exactly.  He sighed.</div> <div> "Hey, how was your trip?"</div> <div> "Fine," Adam replied shortly.  When Randy looked at him curiously, Adam explained, "I did find the school my friends went to.  When I got there, I realized I didn't know where you lived in Setauket."</div> <div> "Oh, shit, didn't I tell you?  Highland Avenue in East Setauket."</div> <div> "Maybe you can come with me when I go next time."</div> <div> "Sure, Adam, sure," Randy agreed readily.</div> <div> It wasn't to happen.  As the weeks passed, Randy let his facial hair grow out.  He didn't cut his hair anymore, and he discarded his uniform.  Adam knew that Admiral Stuart was annoyed and didn't approve.  "He's wearing the chicken foot!" the older man complained one morning after Adam helped him shave.  They were able to look out the window and watched Randy carry a sack into the cottage.  Adam looked for a chicken's foot.  He only saw Randy's jacket; on the back, he had drawn the circle with the three-legged line.  </div> <div> Adam worried that the admiral would ask Randy to leave.  He didn't want that to happen because he needed Randy to come back with him to Collinsport, although Tony Peterson still maintained it wasn't a good idea.  Adam hadn't heard from Cyrus in weeks; Sabrina had seemed strained and out of sorts during her last visit.   He had to find Roxanne!  He talked to Randy about his worries.  </div> <div> "Hey, don't worry about it, man!  If old man Stuart tosses me out, I can find another pad."</div> <div> "What is this chicken foot he says you wear?" Adam asked.</div> <div> Randy rolled his eyes.  "Oh, man!  Look!"  He showed the symbol on his jacket to Adam.  "See that?  The peace sign?  That's what he means."</div> <div> Adam looked closely.  He'd learned that three legs in the circle meant "peace" and two legs meant "ban the bomb".  "Chicken foot?" he asked, puzzled.</div> <div> "This, man." Randy outlined the inner drawing in the circle-the straight line with three legs.  "That's what a chicken foot print looks like."</div> <div> Adam felt foolish.  "Oh!"  He understood now.</div> <div> Randy's face was flush with resentment.  "Chicken foot, huh? The old man thinks I'm a coward, does he?"</div> <div> "He doesn't mean you harm," Adam said hastily.  "He doesn't understand, Randy.  He's an old man."</div> <div> Randy turned away, his face becoming a deeper shade of red.  "He wasn't in the country.  He doesn't know what it was like there."</div> <div> Adam watched Roxanne's brother walking away, another troubled young man.  He still screamed in that foreign language at night.  He still jumped at loud noises.  He still gave himself injections of the liquid which made his head nod.  Yet, working side by side with him in the marine mechanics class, Adam knew he was a very intelligent and skilled man.  They were the quickest of the students, already well into rebuilding a yacht engine.  Frustrated, Adam realized he was powerless to help Randy.  He couldn't help any of his friends-not Cyrus nor Sabrina nor Quentin nor Randy.  He couldn't even find Roxanne!  He sighed deeply, feeling very depressed.</div> <div> Worse, Jennifer was calling.  She wanted Adam to come and visit her again.  Adam tried to dissuade her.  "We can't.  You're married-I'm supposed to marry Roxanne."</div> <div> "I'm thinkin about getting a divorce," Jennifer told him.  "And Roxanne left you."</div> <div> "No, she was taken from me."</div> <div> "Oh, Adam.  You trust too easily.  Would you just come and talk to me, please?  We don't have to do anything.  I don't always need that-it's just that that day, no one had touched me in weeks."  She sounded like she was crying.</div> <div> Adam bit his lip.  "Well, we could drive to Setauket," he suggested.</div> <div> "Sure, sure!  You want to see Roxanne's house, right?  I can show you where it is."</div> <div> Adam also wanted to visit Rev. Longworth's church.  Well, he thought, as long as I am not in her house, we can't do anything wrong together.  He arranged to pick Jennifer up on Sunday morning.  They would go to the church service first, and then drive by Roxanne's childhood home.   The church wasn't especially large, but it was plush and luxurious on the inside.  He and Jennifer sat in the back.  Adam didn't know what to expect from this church.  He'd been in churches of different denominations-Catholic, Presbyterian, Methodist, Lutheran, and Baptist.  This was an independent church, Jennifer explained.  They were "fundamentalist."</div> <div> "What's that?" Adam asked curiously.</div> <div> Jennifer shrugged.  "Never been in one."</div> <div> The church filled quickly, and then Rev. Longworth came out and stood at the podium.  Adam looked at him closely but didn't see any resemblance to Cyrus at all.  This man was short and rotund, with a balding head.  He had a harsh, grating voice.  He sounded mean, Cyrus thought.  Another young man came out leading the choir.  This man looked like Cyrus-he had blonde, curly hair.  He stood in front of the congregation and sang a clear note.  Everyone stood up and began singing from their programs.  There was no musical accompaniment.</div> <div> When it was time, Rev. Longworth stood up and delivered the most frightening sermon Adam had ever heard.  He wanted to slide under the bench and hide from the man.  They were all sinners.  It was a wonder why the Son of God would want to waste his time with any of the people who'd come this morning.  It seemed to go on forever.  When it was finally over, Adam looked at Jennifer. She smirked and whispered, "Well, now you know what one of these is like.  I won't be back, I can tell you that.  I don't need him to remind me that I'm no good!"</div> <div> "I don't think he is supposed to be telling us that," Adam whispered back.  He was thinking of the story of the woman who was about to be stoned.  He'd understood that story and liked it very much.  It disturbed him to think that Cyrus had grown up with a man who told him he was a sinner and not worthy of the Son of Man.  He was sure it had happened, because this man was saying such things to perfect strangers.  Adam knew that people were generally nicer to strangers than they were to their own family members.  He began to understand why Cyrus didn't want to visit his parents.</div> <div> On the way out, though, Rev. Longworth gripped his hand firmly and was very friendly to him.  Adam thought that his voice had an oily texture to it-that it was false and not real.  He wanted to wipe his hand on his pants but didn't want to be rude.  Cyrus' father was inviting them to come back to the kitchen and have coffee with everyone and to be sure to leave his phone number with his son, Joshua.  Joshua would call them during the week to invite them back and see if they would be interested in participating in any of the Bible classes.  Adam murmured politely, grabbed Jennifer's elbow and steered her away.  They went around behind the church and Adam led her straight to the parking lot.</div> <div> Jennifer laughed.  "No coffee, eh?"</div> <div> "Not here!" Adam exclaimed.  "This is a bad place-I can feel it!"</div> <div> "You got that right!" Jennifer agreed.  She helped direct Adam to the village of East Setauket.  They drove to Highland Avenue, which was lined with large homes with old-fashioned wrap-around porches.  "This is a nice place," Adam commented.  He slowed at one of the houses.  Randy hadn't told him the house number, but he was sure he was looking at Roxanne's home.</div> <div> Jennifer was quiet on the drive back to Oakdale.  As they pulled up in front of the house, she said quietly, "I wish you'd come inside with me.  My husband won't be home for hours, and my friend's got Jimmy over to her house."  She sounded sad and pleading.</div> <div> "Jennifer, no."  Adam took her hand in his.  "I'm sorry that you're so unhappy.  I can't."  </div> <div> "I'm not pretty anymore," she said softly.</div> <div> "No!"  He was shocked.  "You're beautiful."  She shook her head, bowing it so that her hair fell in front of her face.  I know what it's like to feel ugly and unloved, he thought.  It's a sad, lonely way to feel.  I hated it.  He put his hand on the back of her head, stroking her hair lightly.  "If I didn't love Roxanne, maybe I wouldn't feel guilty.  But I can't, and it's not because I think you are ugly.  I think you are lovely."</div> <div> She looked up at him, tears still falling, and sighed.  "Thanks for saying that," she said.  "I shoulda met you first.  I never did have any sense when it comes to nice guys."  She got out of the car, her shoulders drooping.  "Would you still be my friend?"</div> <div> "Of course," Adam declared.  He know, though, that he would not try to see her again.  There would be a time when he would feel lost and alone again, and he was afraid he would turn to her in his need.  As much as he wanted to, he didn't want to be with her again-not while he believed he could still find Roxanne.</div> <bR> <div> Before he knew it, the end of March had arrived.  One evening the phone rang.  Answering it, he was overjoyed to hear Quentin's voice.  "Quentin!  You and Maggie are back!" he exclaimed, overjoyed.  "Where are you?"</div> <div> "We're at the Waldorf right now."</div> <div> "Ah! We almost stayed there when we went to see Santa Claus!  And you had a good honeymoon?"</div> <div> "Oh, yes," Quentin answered emphatically.  "A <I>very</I> good honeymoon!  Adam, we thought we'd come see you before we go up to Boston."</div> <div> "Oh, good!" Adam exclaimed.  </div> <div> "Well, can you pick us up at the train station then?  We'll get off right there in Bay Shore."</div> <div> "Yes, yes!"  Adam was practically dancing with glee.  It would be wonderful to see Quentin and Maggie again, it was true, but he was also excited about being able to go back to Collinsport now.  Surely Quentin would get the investigation moving.  It had dragged on for such an intolerably long time, and he felt Cyrus had forgot him.  Only Sabrina had called since he'd left the hospital after the second operation.</div> <div> "Great!  We'll stay at a hotel there-we can check in after we arrive, and then we'll all go out and celebrate."</div> <div> "Far out!" Adam exclaimed, and Quentin began to laugh.  Adam felt a little embarrassed but realized that his friend didn't mean any harm.  "What time will you be coming?" he asked, writing the information down on a piece of paper.  Once he hung up the phone, he did an improvised jig across the living room.</div> <div> "What the fuck is going on?" Randy asked dreamily, turning from the TV to look at Adam.  He might have taken some of the red pills again or perhaps had injected the liquid.  There wasn't any odor of pot in the air.</div> <div> "Quentin and Maggie are back!" shouted Adam.</div> <div> "Christ A'mighty, you'd think the Pope was in town!" Randy exclaimed, laughing, infected by Adam's mood.  The phone rang again.  "You gonna be able to get that, Donny Osmond?"</div> <div> Adam recognized the name-a brother in a family of pop singers who could dance.  He was flattered and capered to the phone.  "Hello?" He felt his heart drop to his stomach when he heard the low voice on the other end of the phone.</div> <div> "Adam?"  The voice was thick with tears.  "I have to see you.  Please.  Just once, before they come out tomorrow."  It was Jennifer, and she sounded forlorn and in despair.  "I'm all alone here, Adam.  Please don't do this to me, too.  I haven't seen you since-since-please say you'll come."</div> <div> "But, Jennifer, I've been talking with you on the phone when you call," Adam responded softly.  He didn't really want Randy to hear, although Roxanne's brother seemed to be absorbed in the television again.</div> <div> "That's not the same.  It's not what I need," Jennifer wept.</div> <div> "I'm sorry," Adam whispered.  He really was sorry, too.  "You are married.  I am to marry Roxanne.  We can't."</div> <div> "All right, I understand," Jennifer answered tearfully.  "Please, can't you just come and talk to me?  I tried not to drink today.  I tried really hard, but I am so lonely.  And Adam?  I'm looking at a bottle of pills."</div> <div> "What pills?" Adam asked, suddenly alarmed.</div> <div> "The doctor gave them to me after Jimmy was born when I couldn't sleep.  If I take them now, I'll sleep."</div> <div> "No!" Adam shouted.  Randy looked around, surprised.  "Don't take the pills!  I will come and we'll-just talk."</div> <div> "Just talk.  I promise.  Thank you, Adam.  Come quickly."  Jennifer sounded relieved.  She hung up.</div> <div> Adam hung up with both hands gripping the receiver tightly.  "What's up, man?" Randy asked.</div> <div> Adam considered.  Should he confide in Randy?  He was afraid to tell all of it-this was Roxanne's brother.  "It's a friend.  A friend who has been drinking and wants to take sleeping pills."</div> <div> "Oh, that's bad shit, man!"  Randy's voice sounded a little slurred, and he shook his head.  "You gotta get him to stop, man.  He could die, that's no lie.  Mixing pills and booze, man, that's bad shit! Y'remember Marilyn Monroe?  That's how she bought it.  And Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin, too.  You can't mix that shit up, man."</div> <div> "I know," Adam muttered, feeling desperate.  "Can you come with me?" he asked hopefully.</div> <div> "Man, I'm not any good when it comes to that shit.  I'm likely to do something stupid like that myself!"</div> <div> "Please don't," Adam snapped in exasperation.  He was on his own.  He wished he could confide in Dr. Cyrus, but he was sure that Cyrus would not want to talk to him. It seems we aren't friends anymore, Adam realized suddenly, his spirits plummeting further.  He couldn't call and bother Quentin, either-it would scare Maggie.  No, he would have to try and help Jennifer all by himself.  He went out, shivering in the night air.</div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <A HREF="id97.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: The Collins Family"><U>Puzzle Pieces:  The Collins Family</U></A>    <A HREF="id99.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Puzzle Pieces: Quentin"><U>Puzzle Pieces:  Quentin</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id85.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Adam in Parallel Time"><U>Adam in Parallel Time</U></A>    <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cassies Writing"><U>Cassie's Writing</U></A></div> <bR> <bR> <div>      </div> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>