Boys
Years 1-7.........Great.
Year 8..........Be like your sister. Get out of that tree. Dont climb
that
wall. Stop whining! You cant eat that. I know you hate pink but you
ARE
going to wear it! Grow up. Its time you started acting like a man! You
ARE
going shopping so get used to it! Stop crying you wimp or go to your
room!
Years 9-14...... No! No, you cant have any money to go to football.
Look at
the state of your clothes. Go and comb your hair you scruffy so-and-so!
Why
cant you take care of your shoes like your sister? No, you cant stay
out
late! What time do you call this? Here`s some money get out and play
with
your mates. No, you cant have a new computer game. No, you cant have
new
football boots, go and get a job!
Years 14-16....... What do you mean you were arrested for vandalism?
No, I
will not visit you in jail! You cant do anything right! I told you she
was
no good for you! You are stupid. No, your mates cant come and stay...
They
eat us out of house and home. Why cant you be like your sister? D
grades??!!!! If you did more work in school you would get better grades.
Years 16-18..... Do as I say or get out of my house!
Year 19........ Why dont you ever write, call or visit?
Years 20-21....... Why did you start taking drugs? Do you want to be
a loser
all your life? Pull yourself together! God! Men are so screwed up!
Girls
Years 1-7........great.
Year 8...........I wish your brother was more like you darling. Do
you want
to help mummy with the shopping? Ahhh, whats the matter darling did
you hurt
you knee? Let mummy kiss it better. You are SO grown up! You look so
nice.
Let me help you with your hair. Never mind sweetheart, mummy will buy
you a
new pair of shoes. Stop crying darling and mummy will buy you some
chocolate.
Years 9-14........ Yes. Yes, you can have some money for eyeshadow,
hairbands, tights, cleansers, spot cream, lipsticks, a new "My
Little Pony,"
hair spray, perfumes, soaps, hair pins, hairdo`s, shoes, skirts, blouses,
etc., etc. You are soooo clever, thats why you do so well in school.
Yes,
you can have a sleep over and a midnight feast for your 26 friends.
Years 14-16....... Darling, I know its awful, but we have to go visit
your
stupid brother in jail. You are sooo intelligent my angel. Mummy is
soooo
proud of you. I am glad you are not like your brother! You got all D
grades?
Never mind darling, you will make up for it later. Yes, of course you
can
have some new shoes. Did he dump you? THE PIG!! Men are ALL the same.
Here,
have a tissue and tell mummy all about it.
Years 16-18....... Its ok love, these moods only happen cos your body
is
changing. Mummy understands.
Year 19...... You are pregnant!! Wonderful, can I come and visit you?
Years 20-21......Its ok darling, everyone experiments with drugs at
sometime
in their life. I am glad you felt able to chat to me about it. You turned
out so well. I am sooo proud of you! Us women are so together!
Oh by the way sweetheart, I know its awkward but I think you really
SHOULD
come to your brothers funeral.
