Title: Cassie's Logic

 

Author: Lisa Yaeger

 

E-mail: lisayaeger@h...

 

Rating: PG-13 for minor language

 

Pairings: Sam/Jack

 

Content Warnings: None

 

Summary: Cassie's mind works in strange ways.

 

Season/sequel: This happens in season 7 after Sam starts dating some

guy.

 

Spoilers: Minor ones for 100 Days, Abyss, Meta, Solitude, Beneath

the Surface, Full Circle

 

Archive: SJD & whoever wants to- I'd be flattered!

 

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and places are the

property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret productions.

This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary

purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was

intended. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this

story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real

persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the

author.

 

Status: Complete.

 

Feedback: Welcomed!

 

Date: 26-3-2003

 

Author's Notes: This is the way it *won't* happen if TPTB do

a BWC

ep. Thanks to Moon for her continued support, late into the night.

And to Sally Murphy for having a shippy heart.

 

*****

 

It had been her move for over 10 minutes. She really didn't know

what to do. That her mind was only half-occupied with the chess game

in front of her wasn't really helping matters.

 

"It's your move." Cassie was clearly getting tired of

waiting even

though her own moves often took up to three times as long.

 

"I know, I know. Give me a minute." She had to concentrate.

 

Concentrating was a task that she hadn't been very good at the

past

few weeks. Since her first date with Greg. They had met in a

coffee shop of all places. They had ordered the same thing, and

when it was called out at the counter, they had both reached for it

at the same time. He did the gentlemanly thing, of course, and let

her have it. In exchange for her number. She realized she was

smiling like a moron just remembering the event, and Cassie must

have noticed.

 

"So, how come you're not with Greg tonight?"

 

What did that mean? Okay, so they had been out every Friday and

Saturday for the last month. No big deal. It was always exciting

in the beginning wasn't it? The first touches, the first time

holding hands, the first time kissing, the first time making out,

and she hoped the first time for other things as well, although they

hadn't quite gotten to that point yet. Not that he hadn't

wanted

to. Not that *she* hadn't wanted to. But, it had been a long

time

for her, and he hadn't been with anyone since his divorce nearly

four years ago, so they had agreed to wait until they were both

comfortable. Needless to say, Greg was an attractive man, and the

idea of sleeping with him was quite enticing. Wait- Cassie had

asked her something- Oh! Right. Greg. Big smile. "He had an

emergency." Such was the life of a doctor. A pediatrician no

less. He loved kids, and wanted a few of his own. Something his ex-

wife didn't, and apparently forgot to mention before they got

married. At any rate, it was something he and Sam agreed on. One

of many things they saw eye-to-eye on.

 

"Are you going to marry him?" Cassie had given up waiting

for Sam

to move and had started flipping through the latest issue of some

teen magazine that had dozens of prom dresses featured inside.

 

Marriage. Now that was a word that had popped into her head more

than a few times since they had discussed his divorce, his desire

for children. Her desire for children, their common interests.

Their mutual physical attraction. They were a perfect match in so

many ways, it was inevitable that the "M" word would flash in

front

of her eyes, wasn't it? "It's not like he's asked

me. I mean we've

only been dating a month."

 

"But you love him?"

 

Inquisitive little bugger, wasn't she? Love. The simplest of

words

with the most complicated meanings. She loved Cassie. Her dad.

Her brother. Her friends. Her teammates. But Greg? Maybe. And

probably in time she would grow to love him. She really had a

feeling he could be *the one*. "Maybe."

 

Cassie tossed aside the magazine and dove for the bag of chips on

the coffee table. Resting her back against the couch, she studied

Sam studying the chess board. "Would you leave the SGC?"

 

Sam's head popped up as if Cassie had just spoken an alien

language. Not an unrealistic possibility given her background, but

still. "Why would you think that?"

 

Cassie shrugged. Her fingers playing with the crumbs at the bottom

of the bag. "I guess I just figured that if you guys got

together

then you would probably have kids one day."

 

As far as Sam was concerned, Cassie was making a non-sequitur.

Where on earth was she coming up with this? "What does that have

to

do with my leaving the SGC?"

 

"Sam." Cassie gave her one of those looks that said Sam was

clearly

missing the obvious. "You've told me before how important

family is

to you."

 

"And?" She pushed the chess board aside, intrigued by

Cassie's line

of thinking.

 

"Aaaaaannnd, you've said how you don't want to miss out

on anything

that happens while your kids are growing up."

 

Because of her mom. Sam had at least learned the lesson that the

time parents and children had together was too short. She wasn't

going to be a full-time working mother. Not that she didn't want

some intellectual stimulation, but it would have to take a back seat

to raising a family. Something else she and Greg agreed on.

"So?"

 

"So, I just figured that if you and Greg are serious, and one

thing

leads to another..."

 

"Cassie, I swear Janet has been letting you read those Danielle

Steele novels again. Look, we've been dating a month. Yes,

we've

talked about the future, but I'm not engaged, we're not

getting

married, and I'm certainly not pregnant." Her voice rose a

little

louder than she wanted. She could feel her face getting flushed,

and turned her attention back to the board.

 

"Okay, okay." She dropped the empty bag of chips to the

floor. "Sorry."

 

Sam sighed. She wasn't angry with Cassie, really. She had just

pointed out the logical course of events. Sam had always intended

to leave SG-1, if not the SGC, before even trying to get pregnant.

No way was she risking the health of her baby for a job, no matter

how important it was. She could contribute in other ways. By

teaching at the Academy. By writing and doing research. Things that

didn't require her to come into contact with alien entities or

technology. So why had she grown so defensive? She felt vulnerable

all of a sudden, and she didn't know why. It was unnerving her,

and

so she reached for the bottle of wine on the table and poured

herself a fresh glass.

 

Cassie stared at her hands, folded neatly in her lap. She

cautiously voiced another question, "Sam?"

 

"Yeah?" Her voice sounded weary and wary. Very unlike Sam

Carter.

 

"Don't you love Jack?" Cassie sat motionless. Barely

breathing.

 

Her mind raced at a million miles a minute. Hyper-drive was

slower. Did she love Jack. The honest answer was yes. Of course

she did. She loved all of her team and their extended

"family."

But that's not what Cassie was asking. Sam wasn't sure which

way to

react- with shock and surprise that Cassie could even suggest such a

thing or with the deliberate vagueness that she always used when the

subject of her feelings for her CO was brought up. Usually by

Janet. The problem was, Cassie would see through her either way.

Just like Janet. So, rather than lie, she just didn't answer and

moved the chess board so it was directly in front of her again.

 

Not deterred, Cassie continued, "I mean, it's just that if

you plan

on leaving your job someday anyway, why not now? Why couldn't

you

just quit and start dating him instead?"

 

She couldn't lift her eyes to meet the brown ones she felt

looking

at her. Definitely reading romance novels. And apparently talking

to Janet some about the frat rules. She was really going to have to

thank Janet for that later. "It's not that simple."

 

"Why?"

 

Why? There were a hundred reasons why. And as soon as she thought

of one, she was going to say it out loud. Yep. Any minute now.

She was just going to leap to her feet and tell Cassie she was

crazy. That the idea was ridiculous. Leave her job to start dating

her CO. That had to be the most absurd reason to quit ever. And

not something Major Carter would even consider. Leaving a job she

had worked so hard far, effectively ending her military career, and

all for a chance at... what?! A few good times? A few nice

dinners?

Maybe a roll in the hay? A couple of laughs. Okay, okay, it would

turn into a bunch of laughs, and probably the best sex of her life.

And everyone knew that the Colonel could cook, so really it was just

about... What was it about again? That she didn't love him.

No,

that wasn't it. That he didn't love her. Well, she

couldn't be

sure, but she was fairly certain that wasn't it either. In fact,

the faster her brain worked, the harder her heart beat. The faster

her blood started pumping. And a feeling that she couldn't quite

describe rose from the bottom of her stomach and into her chest. Oh

no, wait- she remembered that feeling!! It was from Antarctica, and

Edora, and behind the force field, and as Thera. It was in

Nirrti's

cell and even a little on Abydos. It was love. Pure and simple.

The kind that had already grown beyond the confines of her heart.

The kind she could never feel for anyone else. Not even someone as

perfect a match as Greg. She finally looked up at Cassie with eyes

brimming with tears. "Why not?" She smiled through the

drops that

slowly and silently crept down her face as she raised her body off

the floor. She left the chess board as it was on the table, never

having made her move.

 

With a smile of her own, Cassie found Sam's coat and purse and

keys. She hugged her tightly and then walked her to the door.

"So,

you're heading home?"

 

Sam sniffled and brought a tissue out of her jacket pocket to wipe

her nose, "Yeah, I have a couple of calls to make."

 

"Maybe we can finish the game next week?"

 

Sam jingled the keys in her hand, searching for the one to her

car. "I think I might have a date."

 

"Anyone I know?" Her playful tone wasn't missed by Sam.

 

"Just a guy." Sam opened the door and started walking out

onto the

porch, but turned around to find one smug looking teenage girl

looking back at her. "He used to be my boss."

 

*****

 

Love it or leave it, but send me feedback if you've gotten this

far-

lisayaeger@h...