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University of the Virgin Islands
Interracial dating and marrying are on the rise. People of various communities are turning to an integrated way of life and accepting the idea, while some still protest.Interracial dating and marrying is described as the dating or marrying of two people of different races. The bonding may be within any of Afro-American, Caucasians, Hispanic or Asian. This type of bonding is becoming more popular than in times of before. More people are attempting to break down the color barriers that exist so thickly. They are embarking on the seas of colorless love.
In materials provided by Professor of Social Work, Eric Blake, a book by Randall Collins, Sociology of Marriage and the Family: Gender, Love and Property, states that interracial marriages has increased in the United States since the U.S. Supreme Court overturned southern states? laws in 1967 prohibiting such marriages.
At the University of the Virgin Islands interracial relationships are seen. The receptive reactions are a sure sign that our community is becoming liberated.
When asked her opinion on interracial relationships Curlyn Nicholas, a sophomore, responded that she does not see anything wrong with dating or even marrying someone of another race. `If two people can love each other, what difference does it make as to their roots and color.`
Atisha Lanclos, a sophomore nursing major, agrees with Nicholas. Lanclos is known around campus for her relationship counseling and her specialty sensual oils. Lanclos said, staring at a picture of her special someone, `Whenever you can find that someone that makes you happy, take the chance and run with it.` No matter what conflicts that may arise due to outside influences, stick with it. There are problems in intraracial relationships, but it is love that matters, along with the strength of the couple .
Not everyone, however, is as open minded about the given situations. Karen Miller, a freshman, says that she does not like the idea of dating or marrying outside of one`s race. She feels that in order to conquer the negatives between the races, `stick to your own kind.` Miller feels that in doing this there will be no misunderstandings due to difference in cultures.
A sophomore, Marvin Kelly, would be most likely to give Miller two thumbs up. He believes that the `Black man should have no reason to stray from his own empresses to anyone of another race.` On the same note he says `neither should the White man , or the Chinese or Indian or whoever.` Every group is uniquely special and should not be integrated. Mixing races only cause problems, he said, `look what happened to O.J. Simpson.`
The 1994 General Social Survey conducted by the national Opinion Research Center revealed that 15 percent of the whites interviewed nationwide favored a law actually banning all marriages between blacks and whites.
Maybe you always wondered what it was like to be with someone of another race, or even if there is a difference.
A white girl, Sue Ann, asserts that black guys are much more attractive and affectionate than white guys. "Basically, the white guys I�ve seen are pretty hopeless at everything they do when it comes to women - I�ve watched them argue with their girlfriends/wives for hours in bars and clubs and they don�t have a clue."
Yet she doesn't seem to know why that difference is the case. "Maybe its because the black men come from completely different backgrounds to the white ones I�ve met and its natural for them to treat women better."
What about black women's views of interracial relationships?
According to Adama Faroh-Schulz, nursing senior and one half of an interracial marriage, `there is no difference in the races except the tone of skin .` Faroh-Schulz is a native of Sierra Leone, in West Africa. She says that her marriage of 31/2 years has neither been hindered or accentuated by the difference in races. Her husband, Schulz is a Caucasian.
The two met in Africa where he lived for two years. In West Africa, interracial marriages are a common thing. `We had no kind of negative feedback from our families or my community.`
Faroh-Shulz continued to say that she never experienced prejudice until she came to America. `It was only after we went to the States we realized that marriages outside of one`s race was not the norm.`
She said as they walked in the streets they would notice people staring at them. Not only on the streets has she received negative reactions but even right here on-campus. Faroh-Shulz told of one incident that occurred.
`There was one friend that I used to talk to. We got along well for some time. For the Charter Day Ball, my husband who is living in Puerto Rico came to visit. A few days after the ball I saw the friend that I had, and he said, `don`t even come here. I don`t want to have anything to do with anybody that associate with white people.?`
Faroh-Shulz continued by saying that she was very hurt but after thinking it over she realized that it was his own ignorance.
`Anyone not wanting to be associated with white people would not be at a university with mostly white professors. Neither would they buy goods made by white companies.`
People react differently based on there experiences with other races, this causes them to be frustrated at the entire race and not at individuals.
To others in a similar relationship, Faroh-Shulz says that it is a matter of personal choice. `No one should have to be encouraged or prevented. Follow your heart. It is how you feel that makes you happy.`
Although many would give an encouraging word to persons in such relationships the same persons would not engage in such relationships themselves. Seemingly many are not willing to combat the conflict and struggles brought on by friends and families. Addelyn George, a freshman psychology major says, what`s important is the factors that make a relationship work, such as trust, and love, not what is pleasing to family and friends.
One might wonder what may cause family and friends to rebel against interracial dating. There are many reasons that cause such reactions.
As explained in Verna Stolke`s book entitle Marriage, Class & Color In 19th Century Cuba, many families may oppose the bonding of their loved one with someone of another race because of political reasons, religious reasons or family pride. In one example in the book a Spanish doctor was against the bonding of his daughter with a Negro young man because he did not want to `spoil the family blood.`
Opposition by friends can be caused by fear of abandonment. In a case described in The Chronicle of Higher Education, Rachel Davidson, a white female at Brown University, tells of her humiliation after dating an Afro-were written on a wall under the title `Wall of Shame.` This was a list of all interracial couples on campus. The list was made by a group of Afro-America females who felt that if a `brother` dated outside the race he was abandoning his race and neglecting his heritage. Rachel`s boyfriend, sophomore Ralph Johnson says, `Two people should be able to follow their heart and not worry.` Davidson agrees and adds, `I cannot be blamed for the lack of black men getting together with black women.`
As times continue to change and more social progressions evolved, there will never be any one thing that everyone will have the same view points on. In the same light, not everyone will be a supporter of interracial dating and marriages.
