Early in Pepper’s puppyhood we were going on a walk.  Pepper was learning to go on walks and really starting to enjoy them.  If I recall, we had been on maybe five walks at this time total – so the incident below happened to Pepper very early in her life.

Smacked In The Face By A Bee Butt!

The other day our super-intelligent dog decided, during one of our walks, that she was going to run off into the clover fowers and play with a big ol’ bumble bee.  To give you an idea of our dog’s size, the bumbling bee’s butt was a big as our dog’s nose.  So Pepper decided it would be nothing but sheer fun to “play” with the bee by grabbing it with her mouth and frantically shaking it back and forth.  Obviously the bee would enjoy this immensely.

In her ignorant bliss, our dog failed to realize that bees are incapable of playing games, or doing much of anything for that matter.  They are stupid insects whose entire lives are devoted to pollinating flowers like slaves.  They are so stupid, in fact, that they don’t realize that they have the option of not working.  They could just sit around all day and SMELL the flowers.  Or sting horses all day long – now that would be fun.  But instead they spend their entire lives working extremely hard for nothing.  So our little doggie Pepper learned (the hard way) that bees don’t like to play, but bee’s CAN get pissed off and sting dogs in the face.

Smacked in the face by a bee butt!!  About an hour later the right side of Pepper’s head inflated like a balloon.  It was very difficult for me not to laugh.  I thought it was funny that this was the ONLY way dogs will learn to leave bees alone.  I took pictures.  Pepper looked (and I’m sure felt) like she wanted to die.  Imagine getting stung in the face by a bee the size of a mouse, and having the right side of you head swell up like a melon.  Strangely, I can’t coax Pepper into chasing bees anymore.  She’s having a hard time forgetting the lesson she learned:  Bees = pain + swollen body parts.

Here’s our puppy’s daily life:

1. Wake up, exit crate, go outside, pee, dump, go back inside, like butt, scratch fleas.
2. Eat food, chew on tennis ball, scratch fleas, run around growling, smell butt.
3. Go back into crate, sleep, wake up, chew on toys, sniff butt, possibly like butt for an hour straight, go back to sleep.
4. Chris and Julie come home!  Exit cage, go outside, pee, come inside, lick butt.
5. Chase tennis ball, run around, go outside, dump, come inside, sniff butt, lay down, chew on toy.
6. Go outside, pee, come inside, enter crate, lick butt, go night night.  Wake up at 3 a.m., scratch fleas, sniff butt, go back to sleep.