WELCOME TO THE 18TH EDITION OF THE WARNER DAY

 

 

With Harry keeping a heavenly eye on things, Andrew assumes the roll of Donor & Caterer to supplement his normal duties of Editor & Dobber.  Once again it will be “Custard Balls at twenty paces” as this seems to be the only simple teams event that does not interfere with our Club Championship requirements.

 

 

DELLA / LE MON DAY, with 21 Lizards and 3 visitors, produced the following results:

 

1^st LIZARDS                                     Ivan Tiltins - 41 points off 10 handicap

2^nd LIZARDS                                    Jim Small - 40 points on count-back off 15 handicap

3^rd LIZARDS                                     Andrew Warner LM - 36 points on count-back off 21 handicap

4^th LIZARDS                                     Chris Mooney - 36 points off 11 handicap

1^st VISITORS                                   Roy Donald - 37 points off 16 handicap

2^nd VISITORS                                   Bruce Staples - 33 points off 40 handicap

BEST SCRATCH                            Bob Paine - 25 points

BEST FRONT NINE                       Hartmut Schwarz - 18 points on count-back off 28 handicap

BEST BACK NINE                         Ian Massey - 19 points off 18 handicap

NEAREST the PINS                       1^st      John O’Meara                    3^rd     Jim Small

                                                            4^th     Roy Donald                        5^th     Michael Harrison

                                                            9^th     Chris Mooney                     10^th   Ivan Tiltins

                                                            12^th   Tony Della                          13^th   Chris Mooney

                                                            14^th   Michael Morgan                 18^th   Michael Harrison

LONGEST DRIVES       19+          2^nd    Glenn Castle

                                           18-           2^nd    Ian Massey

BRADMAN        Lizards                 Wall Hill - 15 points off 34 handicap

                            Visitors                 Keith Townsend - 25 points off 40 handicap

 

 

Ivan Tiltins led the Lizards in with a fine 41 points.  He was using a new set of clubs during his round & was heard to say “these clubs are worthy of a single figure marker”. I am quite sure our handicapper will make this dream come true.

 

 

 

 

Jim Small, after a first nine score of 22 points led the field at the first turn.  His putting, however, let him down slightly on the back nine (as he explained in detail to his playing partners on numerous occasions) and Jim finished with 40 points for second place on the day.

 

 

Jim’s cart partner, our esteemed Dobber, finished with 36 points (plus an ear ache) to claim 3rd place in a count back from President Chris Mooney who, by strange coincidence, also finished with 36 points (but without an ear ache).

 

 

Roy Donald took out 1st place in the visitors with a fine score of 36 points.  It was certainly his last attempt at this trophy because, in the course of our meeting, his membership application was submitted.  This application, when read to the body of the meeting caused reactions ranging from sickening gasps to straight out nausea & in the ensuing confusion, our President, who seems to be impervious to outside influences, declared Roy our latest member. Congratulations Roy.  May your membership be a long and happy one.

 

 

Bruce Staples and Keith Townsend once again made the podium but this month it was for different reasons.  Bruce relinquished his funny hat in favour of a second placing whilst Keith, last month’s winner, found the vacant hat too much of an opportunity to pass up.  Both these gentlemen are now eligible to become members.

 

 

It was really great to have Tony Della with us again.  Now a country member, Tony has always had the Lizards at heart & we look forward to being with him next March during our Moss Vale / Calderwood / Jamberoo trip.

 

 

As mentioned previously, today we will be playing a teams event in conjunction with our normal monthly fixture.  Affectionately christened the “Custard Ball” event by Harry Warner 18 years ago, it involves the issue of an appropriately coloured golf ball to each group playing.  This ball rotates, in turn, hole by hole to each member of the group & the score made by the player using this ball becomes the team’s score for the hole.  If the ball is lost, bad luck. The team score at the time the ball is lost remains.

 

 

Jim Small & Bob Paine made their debut as caterers last month & did a fine job.  With the experienced gained from their debut, I am sure their next attempt will not involve:

 

• Jim dropping our frankfurts on the shed floor upon arrival at Lizards.
• Jim dropping the tongs into the boiling water in the immerser causing Bob to scald his fingers retrieving them.
• Bob purchasing an iceberg lettuce for our salad when previous caterers have tendered cos lettuce.

 

 

Bob Paine, in an impromptu putting lesson to his playing partners showed just how professional golfers execute their fourth putt on a green. With considerable vigour.

 

 

 

 

A regular event during the course of our meeting is the demonstration of singing prowess

by our air swinging golfers.  The regular choir contains most voice ranges with Brian Ellis our bass baritone, Walter Hill our baritone & Hart covering the tenor duties.  Knowing we were short of a soprano, esteemed life member Gary Bird positioned himself directly in Mike Dodd’s line of fire on the 10th & 16th holes last month.  Unfortunately, Mike’s poor aim did nothing to enhance our choir but it certainly did elevate Garry to lead role in the next production of “Hot Shoe Shuffle”.

 

 

TODAY’S PLAY

Handicap Adjustments

Jim Small                              -1

Ivan Tiltins                             -1

Tony Della                              1

Mike Dodd                             1

Brian Ellis                              1

Colin Lacey                           1

Ian Massey                            1

Michael Morgan                    1

Keith Townsend                    1

Neil Winterton                        1

Wal Hill                                   2