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Archive Page 9: June~July 2001
Buffalo Trocks
Author: Marnie , Jun/7/2001 18:20:40
Homepage: Greyland
Hi all,
Just a reminder that "Buffalo Tracks" tomorrow (08 June) should ...or could
...be the
one in which MG is interviewed. Evan Adams duly announced it last week
....but as,
the last time they were shown, MG's episode was skipped and shown out of
sequence- I don't know whether they'll actually air them in the correct
order ...or just
show them in the order they originally did, sigh....check it out if you
can anyway!
Marnie:)
:-{ sigh - Zan, Jun/7/2001 21:52:32
Not this little black trock ... such
are the wages
of living in the Southern Hemisphere. sigh.
Back to the Vikings ...
Author: Zan , Jun/7/2001 22:17:07
(Don't think we can have burgers in this historic
period ... can we ? HOWEVER, I fully intend to have
hot tea, herbal or otherwise, cause it's cold at six
a.m. down here !! ... Think I'll have an English muffin
or two, with leatherwood honey, as well ...
Yummmmmmmmm !)
BACK TO OUR HERO:
Zan has just arrived in the Viking camp hauling her
leather bag full of aromatic oil rubs, tea pots for
every occasion, a soft blanket for Michael the Magnificient
to lay on (while she ministers to his pain), a kilo
of Lord Hi-Greylander tea mix, freshly warmed trocks
(enough for everyone), and in a specially sealed crock --
the clothes of Harold the Scabby and Practically Bald
(he'll be stuck in camp awhile yet, tied up as he
is under a bundle of furs with a stale cucumber
sandwich shoved in his mouth back to his tonsils).
Alright -- where's Lord Michael ? I've come to do
as Marlene the Wolf asked !! My lord needs me -- ME!!
(Power's a great thing, if ephemeral.) Kiki, the
Valiant -- you got a spare bench I can work on ? ...
Now where have those princesses gotten to ? And
what about Nellie Chameleon Woman and Eric the Red ?
Hello - Nellie, Jun/8/2001 04:03:12
Like Marlene said, l've gone to Michaeldom.
Thought l'd say hello to all you struggling
in the Viking era. l really like it here.
Michaeldom ? - Zan, Jun/8/2001 18:30:38
Never heard of the place ... Now, Nellie --
you can't stay there when we need you so much !!
Who's going to help Marlene ? Who'll disguise themselves
and spy for Michael the Magnificient ? I know it's
smelly and cold in Viking land, but we NEED you, girl !!
guy's in skirts?????? - Kiki, Jun/9/2001 20:04:14
got to wondering what those viking guys used to wear. i passed by this
big Celtic
festival way out in the country side today. All these good ole boys getting
out of there
pickup trucks. Wearing plaid skirts! with those funny looking decorative
bags in front.
Maybe to hold trocks?? hey those guys must be roasting in this heat wearing
those wool
skirt's.
Did viking's wear skirts like kilts too? Give me a guy in jeans & cowboy
boot's any day.
no skirts PLEASE!!! Kiki
Kilts !!! NOT Skirts - Zan, Jun/10/2001 00:17:45
Kiki -- sometimes I despair of you. ;-} Those were
KILTS those good ole boys had on. And I have to tell
you that there are many BIG CELTIC MEN (like my
husband !!) who wear them on formal or clan occasions !!
That's a sporran on the front -- that funny leather
bag you saw.
Actually they are surprisingly cool -- the air
circulates underneath and keeps 'things' cool, so to
speak.
On chat-Saturday we discussed the possibility of
carrying trocks (and hot haggis) in the sporrans
... to keep 'em warm, like. All of this of course
had NOTHING WHATEVER to do with Michael -- we were
just mucking about.
As far as Vikings wearing KILTS, no they didn't.
They wore tunic thingies and trousers. In winter
they wore a cloak over the top to keep warm. Check
sites on the net -- they'll tell you exactly what
they wore.
Now I reckon some men would look absolutely fabulous
in jeans and cowboy boot (Michael being one of them),
but some don't -- like my poor hubby. But put him
in a kilt, and I spend all my time cuddling up to him,
particularly if ... No -- think I won't go there ...
skirts - Kiki, Jun/10/2001 19:43:48
Zan a skirt is a skirt is askirt. guy's legs are to hairy to wear them
any way!
& most of them have ugly knees.but whatever makes you're heart go
pitterpatter right????
Going out to buy tight jeans && lizardskin cowboy boot's f/ a special
guy.*sigh* if I ever saw him in a kilt i'd knock some sense back into him
faster than u could pour the Jack D bbq sauce on your trocks.........Kiki
A kilt is a kilt, of course, of course ... - Zan, Jun/11/2001 01:11:50
You hanging out with a special breed of hairy males
with knobby knees and terrible calves ? I admit most
Celts are hirsuite, but this isn't necessarily a
BAD thing ... My men generally have great legs --
very muscular -- so they look great in KILTS !!!
You need some re-educating in construction of gender,
Girlfriend. Men in KILTS are NOT feminized !!
Now, rolling past that -- men MUST have a great tookis
to wear jeans, not one of those flat, flabby numbers,
AND a ripped stomach. Otherwise it's just pathetic,
n'est pas ?
Untitled
Author: Marlene, Jun/8/2001 05:45:38
Zan is a little tired after hauling all her gear but
brightens up when she sees Michael on the bench
that Kiki has prepared for our hero.
Please,Zan,don't put the stuff from Scabby Butt
Harold in here!
Magua has escorted the lovely princesses to Kiki's
and they are holding Michael's hand and combing his
long beautiful hair. Magua takes the princesses to
the two trock chairs as Zan prepares for Michael's
message.
Zan must be a great messeuse because Michael is
purring like a kitten! The two princesses are
giggling in the corner.
The message finished, Michael gets up and rolls his
arm in a circular motion. For some unknown reason,
Magua breaks into laughter.
AH! Zan has received her well deserved reward------
Michael goes over to Zan and showers a big smile
on her. Zan's heart is beating fast as Michael,The
Magnificent, takes her into his arms and gives Zan
a big, grateful hug. "Thankyou,Zan! I feel great!"
Magua,although enjoying the scene a lot, reminds
everyone that we must get back to the business at
hand. "Distroy Harold.The Unwashed! Eric The Red's
orders. Michael,Magua,Marlene,The Wolf put on their
battle gear and prepare for battle as the lovely
princesses are left in the care of Valiant,Kiki!
Viking saga continues - Carol, Jun/8/2001 13:10:14
Carol who has been lurking out in the forest all night
appears on the scene just in time to apply sunscreen
to the 3M's.
Carol- "Thanks for warming Michael up for me,Zan! Now I
can give him a good slathering with my special SPF formula."
Michael is now loose as a goose.Marlene and Magua glare
at the goings on. Magua looks over at Marlene and states
"What are we chopped haggis?" Carol hands a crock of trocks
and sunscreen to Marlene and says slyly "Why don't you 2 find a
quiet place to share these little gifts, or maybe take a long
drive in Magua's blue Mohawkmobile?" The princesses decide to
partake of Carol's specially brewed tea and fall asleep. Zan is standing
there
steaming (we aren't talking tea here.) Kiki gives Zan a glance,
and states "Me thinks we should throw the wench out!"
Carol-"Now look, I have this great thing to vanquish Harold with.
She hands Zan a bar of soap."This will really knock him out, it's
like what Krytonite is to Superman. Besides Zan you are the only
one that can really get to Harold!" Kiki says "I hate to admit
it but it makes sense!" Zan heads out to give 'Harold
the Unwashed' a bath, with Carols secret weapon. Magua and
Marlene hop into the Mohawkmobile geared up for a fight,
and take Kiki with them. This leaves Carol alone with "Michael the
Magnificent".:):)
Oh No, you don't !!! - Zan, Jun/8/2001 18:57:20
Before Zan leaves for Harold's bath house, she alerts
the princesses to Carol's devious plans. Marnie
sends one of her manly contingent to fetch a horse for
Michael -- she knows he'll want to join in the
battle.
While the princesses wait for the horse to
arrive, they feed Michael peeled grapes and fresh,hot
trocks.
Zan, by now quite cool-headed, arrives in Harold's
camp, rescues him from under the furs, and coaxes
him into the bath house, promising to very gently
wash his scabby skull and back. (Jeez, Carol -- you're
some cruel woman !! And I was NOT steaming earlier --
you lie like a rug !! That green-eyed monster around
your neck does not become you !!)
Saga continues.... - Carol, Jun/9/2001 01:56:33
Whence we left Michael and Carol:) Carol was slathering
Michael the Magnificent. While slathering, she was also sighing and
slobering. Michael rests his hands on her shoulders, smiles
down at her, with that terrific smile of his, and says,
"Gee, faithful servant I'm glad you brought some protection
(from the sun)for me knowing how much I'm out doors and all but I just
don't
know if I like that necklace you are wearing." "Then take it off"
Carol coos. Michael gently lifts the drool bucket from around
Carol's neck. Her frock catches on the bucket handle and
off it comes. She is standing there in her Viking underwear,
which had been hammered out by Kiki. "Care for a muffin Master?"
Carol says coyly. Michael can not get near Carol without puncturing
himself. A very clever ruse by Kiki, the inventor of the first
chastity bra. "Carol, you are very fetching in that outfit,
it's in my favorite color too, iron grey. However I'm afraid
I can not be unfaithful to Mrs. Magnificent. Why don't you get a fresh
dress on and help the princesses with their primping."
Just then the horse is delivered to 'Michael the Magnificent'
and he is off to join Magua and 'Marlene the wolf' in their mission to
rid the land of 'Harold scabby butt.'
Hold On Carol! - Marlene, Jun/9/2001 06:13:02
You did great,Carol, but let's tell them more on how our
noble mounts were brought to us.
And don't forget how the noble princesses came back
from chartering the boat from The Captian and
Gilligan to search the seas for Michaeldom and
Nellie,only to return dissapointed and a bit down.
By all means help the princesses with their primp-
ing and rest then. After all your heart must be
still fluttering after Michael was so close!!!!!
Hold on(AS ARNIE SAID----I"LL BE BACK!)
Oh, Baby ... - Zan, Jun/8/2001 18:46:51
Smiles and hugs !! Purring like a kitten ?!!
Can I stand this much attention ? One thing I do
know -- Michael sure smells better than Harold, even
on a hot day when he's been fighting !!!
So -- guess I'll boil some water over the forge for
hot drinks all round and bake a fresh lot of trocks.
kwitcherbitchin.... :) *g* - Kiki, Jun/8/2001 22:38:45
While you guys snivell & quibbel over foolishness i have a big order
of horned
metal warhelmets to finish before the dead line on Sunday. Zan & Marlene
get
your lazy duff's over here to the smithy & help me if i don't finish
them ontime
it's off with my pretty little head. Those Viking's are tough customers.
Kiki
sweating over the red hot forge. my work is never done. bring me a mug
of mead
i;m thirsty!!!!!! No pouring water on MY forge Zan or these hats will never
get
done. what do you think this is a sauna or something????????????
Water your forge ? - Zan, Jun/9/2001 01:02:00
Hey -- I would never pour water on your forge !! You
think I'm a wing-nut or something ? (Although come to
think of it, a sauna this cold winter morning would
really help !!) I was just going to put a largish pot
of water on to boil for some of that hazelnut concoction
you brought last time. But if you want a mug of mead,
I'm right on it !!
As to my 'duff' being lazy, give it a break, woman --
I've just given Michael the shoulder rub of a lifetime,
and now I have to (stomach-turning; skin turning
bileous green) bathe Harold to set him up for defeat
by Michael and Co.
You can raz Carol all you want, though. She's the one
who sent me off to Harold's camp to prove my loyalty.
sigh. Why does everyone pick on me ? (thumb-sucking
and whining)
Horns for war helmets - Carol, Jun/9/2001 02:10:48
Kiki, Zan,*w*I hope you are not too attached to your head because you
know the horns you ordered for those helmets? Well- the
supplier says he can't get them here till next Tuesday.
See ya!
What horns ? - Zan, Jun/9/2001 18:27:39
Hey !! I am NOT working on helmets, okay ??!! You
sent me off to bathe Harold -- odious job, that !!
Still, I'd do just about anything to prove my loyalty.
But, Kiki ... Carol ... you two can just kiss my
teapot !! *LMAO*
O.K. So we won't have horns on the helmets... - Carol, Jun/9/2001 18:54:09
Zan, So did you find out what the plan is? I mean with
Harold. Like when, where how, is he gonna attack?
The Kava Kava, and chamomile I threw in the tea has just
about worn off on the princesses, and I've been instructed
by
the 'Magnificent one' to help those beauties primp.
Looks like my weapon is a hairbrush. Marlene gets to
have a real weapon like a sword and shield.(sulking)
I think I'll just sit over here and have a chocolate
covered trock and some tea till I think of something.
Care to join me? Maybe between the two of us we can think
of a counter attack.
Did you say 'tea' ? - Zan, Jun/9/2001 19:54:04
No -- haven't discovered the plan ... yet. That
man takes a lot of scrubbing, and he's really enjoying
it, too !! (BLEH !!)
Still, Marlene seems to know about everything that
happens before it does ... How does she do that !!??
As to the hairbrush -- Harold could use a good
spanking.
(Sound of light going on) Maybe that will make him
talk !! Here -- give me the brush !
I'm sure Kiki has finished some swords if not all
the helmets. Weren't you helping her ? I seem to
recall her calling our duffs lazy !! Guess
'persuation' isn't in her vocab., eh ?
Nah -- no tea for me at the moment. Would like one
of those cucumber sandwiches, though, now that the
princesses are back in action.
Well, I'm off to spank ... uh ... finish scrubbing
Harold's back and trocks. See ya !!
OOPS! Correction---
Author: Marlene, Jun/8/2001 05:54:29
The word is "Massage" Please excuse???
By the way,Zan, to answer your question----
I'm a red wolf!
Marlene
Re wolves ... - Zan, Jun/8/2001 19:00:21
I'm a timber wolf sorta girl myself. Maybe we could
work them into the saga somehow. Whaddaya think ?
(Like a fresh trock and a mug of mead ?)
Thanks! - Marlene, Jun/8/2001 23:30:28
Zan,
Don't mind if I do!
Buffalo Tracks - MG Appearance
Author: Jeri, Jun/8/2001 18:38:31
The interview with Michael was in fact, rebroadcast on today's
show. It should air again at 8:00 p.m.
That long hair....**sigh**
Jeri
Re long hair - Zan, Jun/8/2001 19:03:10
I agree with you completely !! Too bad it's all gone
now ... sigh. I estimate it will take about four
years to get to its previous length. Think I can
hold on just that long ...
'hair' brained discussion?? *g* - Kiki, Jun/8/2001 22:28:50
sure the long hair gave him a unique & exotic look but what ever he
thinks is the
right thing for his career i'm all for it. We're not fans because of his
hair. we're
fans of his talent his integrety, & his sincerity. Hair or no hair
when he flashes
that wonderful smile, thats' all that matters.
Actor's change their hair & their looks all the time. So do rock stars.
i'd still be a true blue fan if he went as bald as a doornob. or should
i say bald as
one of those trocks you guys are always talking about??? *g* Kiki
Bald as a trock ... - Zan, Jun/9/2001 00:49:19
Well hey, Girl -- where ya been ? Of course I agree
that no matter how Michael wears his hair (or doesn't,
I'd still be a devoted fan. BUT I adore his look when
he has long locks -- can't help it, I'm that shallow !!
Still, you're right about his smile !! Glaciers have
melted after being treated to one of those.
As to trocks being hairless -- who said they were ?
l hate bald. - Nellie, Jun/9/2001 03:03:45
Well now ya got me started. l detest the bald look.
guys look like dam skeletons or giant babies.
Have l ever
posted the e'mail from the mother of a 9yr old boy
who refuses to cut his hair despite the pressure at
school. He said he would not give them the
satisfaction because his hair is what makes him an
individual, that it is his right and more importantly
his heritage.
"Mommy, l'm proud to be American Indian, that's what
l am now and l will be Indian tomorow."
Bald or long locks he's still Michael!! - Carol, Jun/9/2001 04:10:48
Welcome back from the beach in Michaeldom, Nellie! I love
Michael
best with his hair long too, butcha know what? I also
loved the acting of Yul Brynner, and his head
was shaved. It was the look in his eyes, the passion he
conveyed of the character he was playing, that really came across.
Great actor! Michael does the same thing. That's why he's soooo
good!
He's an actor, trying to fit into the role he was playing,
I don't think he was making a social statement when he
decided to cut it. Let's just pray Michael doesn't
accept a role where he's playing the life of Yul Brynner or
Telly Savales.
How about joining in the fun with a contribution to the Viking
story!
More Power to the long hairs! - Marlene, Jun/9/2001 05:55:12
Yes,most Indians are proud to be Indian I think!
Finally afer so many suffering years in Mission
and state schools ,where one of the first things
they did with the new Indian Students was cut the
boys' hair so they would look like "refined" white
children. I believe it's called ASSIMILATION Make
the wild heithens tame! Make them be absorbed into
the white stream of life. DON'T ASK THEM! Just do it
It was believed that the Indians did not have
religion,so cram Cristianity down their throuts.
And all Indian tribes had such beautiful spiritual
religion in their every day lives----not just one
day out of the week.
Finally we all Americans are free to follow our
own wishes and choices in life(Lenth of Hair,
Religion or anything else!)
So,Indians,blacks,whites,hispanics and everybody
wear your hair the way you want it out of freedom
of choice not because someone else says so.
Of couse any guy(Indian or White or any other
color who wears his hair to his waist really
turns me on!!!!!
Give me hair down to there ... - Zan, Jun/9/2001 18:22:24
Ain't it a poop that assimilation is still going on ?
I, too, find that whole Christian-conversion schtick
gives me the willies. I won't give to any charity
that helps people in other countries unless they're
non-denominational. (People shouldn't have to give
up their culture and religion -- which in many cases
is synonymous -- to eat and get medical care. How
awful is that !!???)
There are still many professions in the Western World
that have a 'short-hair' policy for men. I think that's
a kind of discrimination that places like Disneyland
and McDonald's enforce. And if a long-haired guy
goes to places like Malaysia and Indonesia, they
strip-and-cavity-search him coming and going.
Still, show me a man with long-hair, particularly down
past his shoulderblades, and I'm draggin' my tongue
on the pavement with all you lot.
Giant Babies ... - Zan, Jun/9/2001 18:11:20
Nellie, Nellie --
Most guys (except for Michael and a select few others)
are giant babies. sigh. Hair doesn't change that --
the lack of just reveals their true nature.
This mania for short hair (or no hair) sure feels
like a return to Fifties conservatism to me. sigh.
You'd think the new century would have brought about
advocacy for individualism. What was I expecting ?
The US voted in walnut-brained Bush -- Mr. Stupid
AND Conservative.
Zan - oh yeah? - Kiki, Jun/9/2001 20:13:57
Zan you wrote 'As to trocks being hairless -- who said they were ?'
(girl dont' you even go there!) i bet you a bottle of Jack Daniel's
bourbon barbecue sauce, i say you never even SAW a real live trock up
close & personal! *g* what would ya DO with one if you found one any
way?*wink*
Well back to the forge i got an extention from the Viking's leaderto
next thursday for those horned helmets. gotcha Marlene or was it carol!
Kiki
Helmets - Carol, Jun/9/2001 22:39:05
Glad to hear you got an extension! Looks like there
won't be an extraction (of your head).
How about taking over some of the brushing duties
of the royal coffures? My arm is getting tired and
that's my tea drinking arm. You don't want to see me
die of thirst do you? I could use a cucumber sandwich
right about now, too.
Re trocks and things that go bump ... - Zan, Jun/10/2001 00:26:40
Glad you got an extension on turning out those horned
helmets !! Too bad in a way -- I'm doing backflips
imagining Michael with his hair all flat and silly
from being jammed into one of those things !!
(It was Carol, by the way who said the shipment hadn't
come through. Think she didn't want to work with
you at the forge. LMAO)
And I've seen plenty of trocks ... sure I have !! I've
seem 'em up close and personal as it gets, I tells ya.
If I found one just laying around on its lonesome, I
put back with its friends ... well to begin with,
anyway. See -- there's so many uses for trocks, I'd
be spoiled for choice. Guess you better put that
barbeque sauce in the mail, Girl !!
Princesses ?
Author: Zan , Jun/9/2001 20:05:33
What's been happening with you women ? And Sonja --
don't tell it's been all about wallpaper !!
Frankly, I've been longing for sandwiches all week !!
Hog Tied - Marnie, Jun/10/2001 01:02:14
Homepage: Greyland
Hey, it's hard to get at a computer keyboard when you are gagged
and drugged and tied up ....which is pretty much how you guys have
us (though I believe Sonja is actually being held captive by a band
of marauding house painters *g*...No ...really!). We've been sitting
back ...waiting to be rescued ...and rather enjoying watching all
the madness unfold!!
....Don't suppose someone could scratch my nose, huh?
Marnie:)
Poor hog ... tied - Zan, Jun/10/2001 14:28:59
Well, hey Girls --
You're not drugged any more !! Michael sent Carol
to help you two get gussied up. Kiki tried to co-opt
me and Carol, but Carol (the heartless woman) sent me
off to bathe Harold and get information out of him
about his plans, all to prove my loyalty!!
Before I went, I did two things: 1) I told you (you
had woken up and I untied you) that Michael had been
left behind by Marlene and Mangua; you sent one of
your contingent to fetch a horse for our Lord Hi-Grender
(whom Carol had been planning some alone time with!);
2)I took Carol's hairbrush (she had been working on
you two's coiffures) so she could take up a sword
instead (once she got finished helping Kiki with the
horned helmets); I intended to use the brush on Harold
...
Kiki said Carol and I should get our lazy duffs over
to help her, but I assured her that we didn't have lazy
duffs: I had given Michael the shoulder rub of a life-
time, handed out warm, fresh trocks and tea, then gathered
up my stuff to go back and free Harold from under all
those animal skins, then bathe him in an effort to
get information; Carol had been sent by Michael to
revive you two and ... well, she was getting tired of
doing hair.
Anyway, Carol said the shipment of horns had been held
up. Luckily Eric was feeling in a pretty good mood
after I had rescued him from the drink (Nellie threw
him overboard by mistake, thinking he was Harold) and
then massaged his big, muscular body (too hairy for
my liking, though) with warm oils while plying him
with mead and a platter of hot trocks. SO, he gave
Kiki an extension until Thursday on weapons and helmets.
That's the state of affairs for the moment... as far
as I know, that is. Carol may be planning something
else devious (*g*) to get Le Magnifico (or whatever
that is in Viking-speak)to herself. We ALL know very
well that His HI-NESS may only be with princesses !!
Don't know what that woman is thinking !!
totally confused thanks to Zan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Kiki, Jun/10/2001 17:41:25
now Zan's got the story& me totallly messed up. Well while she's summing
up
the story i've got helmets to finish & now a new order for 1000 Viking
sword's by Friday. The Hi-Vi him self asked me nice so i can't say no
right???
my work is never done. and you slugs arent' helping me one bit. all you
talk
about is bath & massage& trocks,i've been working so hard at the
forge.
havent' had a bath or a good meal in a week. At least I'm doing something
USEFUL for THE CAUSE. (What IS the cause anyway zan has me so
confused!!!!) Send 1 of those strong young viking guy's to give me a masage
i
need it bad my muscles are so sore.
Kiki
p.s. jack Daniel's bbq sauce on moldey haggus is pretty good to......!!!
Sick puppy ... - Zan, Jun/11/2001 01:02:22
Kiki -- what am I to do with you ? First you confuse
kilts with skirts, now you're confused by the storyline.
I'LL send one of those long-haired Viking lads that
I've personally trained to give you a long overdue
massage, Woman !!
But please -- go have a sauna and wash first, loosen
those muscles up !! I'll have the boy bring you food
to eat while having a massage. (Promise -- no haggis
or cucumber sandwiches. Like some mead, as well ?)
You'll work better once you're refreshed, you know !!
Calling us names, like "slugs", and telling us our
duffs are lazy will not make us move in your direction,
I can tell you. If you ask the princesses nicely, I
bet they could spare some of their very fit lot of
men to help you out, let you have a bit of a break.
So be NICE, okay ?
As soon as I have some definite information from Harold
the Scabby (currently being washed and spank ... having
his hair brushed), I'll be back ...
ok i give up Zan - Kiki, Jun/11/2001 11:52:21
hmmmm
