Writings

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=100 BGCOLOR="#CCCCFF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="04400640egdysm.jpg"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#000066" FACE="Arial" ><B>Ana Angels</B></FONT><FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#000099" FACE="Arial" ><B> </B></FONT><B>    |     </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Ana Angels"><U><B>home</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id18.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="About Me"><U>About Me</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id19.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Tips And Tricks"><U>Tips And Tricks</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id20.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="BMI (body mass index)"><U>BMI (body mass index)</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id22.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Exercise and Meal Plans"><U>Exercise and Meal Plans</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id23.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Thinspiration"><U>Thinspiration</U></A>   |   <B>Writings</B>   |   <A HREF="id25.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="What NEVER To Do"><U>What NEVER To Do</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id26.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="If You Hate Me..."><U>If You Hate Me...</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id27.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Letter from Ana"><U>Letter from Ana</U></A></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#0000BF" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <div> <B>Poems copyrighted 2001 by K.D</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>2001:</B></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#exquisite" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Exquisite</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#dance" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Dizzy Dance</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#insane" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Insane</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#delusion" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Delusion</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#emptiness" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Emptiness</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#love" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>In Love</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#bear" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>My Teddy Bear</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#no" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>NO</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#name" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>No Name</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#felicia" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Felicia</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#wear" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>The Mask I Wear</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#heart" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>My Heart</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#swirling" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Swirling</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <B>2000:</B></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#me" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Let Me</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#tonight" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Tonight</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#broken" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Broken</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#impurity" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>My Impurity</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#me_1" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>No One Hears Me</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#fall" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>If I Should Fall</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#take" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>You Take</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#love_1" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Love</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#life" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Life</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <B>1999:</B></div> <div> <B>Death</B></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#bird" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>I Am A Bird</B></U></A></div> <div> <B>Shining Rivers</B></div> <div> <B>Columbine</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>1998:</B></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#night_" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Night</B></U></A><B> </B></div> <div> <A HREF="id24_m.htm#call" TARGET="TRLX_Middle" TITLE="Writings"><U><B>Night Call</B></U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" height=380 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <I>Writings</I></div> <bR> <div> Exquisite <A NAME="exquisite"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Sink your teeth into the peach</div> <div> feel the skin break</div> <div> the sweet nectar against your tongue</div> <div> let yourself bite deeply</div> <div> into the flesh</div> <div> feel the vessels and veins </div> <div> burst in your mouth</div> <div> feel the crimson stain</div> <div> spill and drip over your lips </div> <div> hold a beating heart in cupped palms</div> <div> above your upturned face</div> <div> love the life-blood</div> <div> as it streams into your open mouth</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Dizzy Dance <A NAME="dance"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> kiss of the torn on the wrist </div> <div> bite of the tongue on the skin </div> <div> don't stop to sort it all out </div> <div> it gets clearer when you spin</div> <div> dizzy minds don't analyze the darkness</div> <div> or fear the shadows that don't move</div> <div> so stretch your arms out to the faeries</div> <div> and dance in your circles of truth</div> <div> lie on the spring grass with your love</div> <div> swing to the stars with the beat of the drums</div> <div> dizzy ears don't taste any bitterness</div> <div> in blood shared by two tongues</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Insane <A NAME="insane"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> The last sunset is melting</div> <div> and dripping on the cone</div> <div> lick it off, find a napkin</div> <div> don't let it stain your shirt</div> <bR> <div> bring me more bullets</div> <div> while you're going; don't think</div> <div> just one will do</div> <div> there are a lot of spies</div> <div> the dark glasses hide their eyes</div> <div> they're invisible</div> <bR> <div> the last leaf is falling off</div> <div> the tree of life</div> <div> Find the rake, I can't take this mess</div> <div> A little bunny playing in the leaves</div> <div> slice off it's feet, dye them green</div> <div> It'll bring us luck and a place to put our keys</div> <bR> <div> Unlock the door and let me out</div> <div> They'll realize their mistake</div> <div> I'm not the one who's insane</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Delusion <A NAME="delusion"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <bR> <div> Come with me into the rain</div> <div> drown out our sorrow and our pain </div> <div> pelted by the pounding tears </div> <div> falling from the heven above</div> <div> they grow colder and harder</div> <div> as they fall from the sky</div> <div> we can pretend our pain has died</div> <div> being drunk on something like wine</div> <div> we stop searching for the light</div> <div> getting lost in the thickness of night</div> <div> not thinking of tomorrow</div> <div> we take out the knife</div> <div> thinking it'll make everything right</div> <div> watch as the rain pelts </div> <div> with tears that seem to be cried by the angels who see</div> <div> us standing in the cold cruel streets </div> <div> we could pray that some guy</div> <div> with no concience to defy</div> <div> just takes the decision from us with a dark bullet</div> <div> gone in an instant</div> <div> the knife clattering to the street</div> <div> while with smiles we greet the rain</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Emptiness <A NAME="emptiness"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> I see through glazed eyes</div> <div> the sober world in drunken paradise</div> <div> blurred figures shoot hollow pullets </div> <div> they fly at me </div> <div> my eyes are clouding </div> <div> I cannot see</div> <div> the danger of bright illusions </div> <div> and dark reality</div> <div> images of perfect chaos reflect</div> <div> in a pool of delusion, but are </div> <div> distorted with each drop sentiment </div> <div> that leaves rippkes in its wake</div> <div> the emptiness is so simple </div> <div> so intricate</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> In Love <A NAME="love"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> I fell in love one night,</div> <div> With a man I barely knew.</div> <div> I'd wait forever and a day,</div> <div> To hear him say, "I love you, too."</div> <div> His smile lit up my life,</div> <div> His life opened up my heart.</div> <div> I knew I would always love him,</div> <div> Right from the very start.</div> <div> Every time I look at him,</div> <div> My heart falls in his hands.</div> <div> Maybe if he knew how much I loved him,</div> <div> He would understand.</div> <div> He'd wrap his arms around me,</div> <div> he'd Hold me really tight.</div> <div> My love for him grows stronger,</div> <div> Every day and night.</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> My Teddy Bear <A NAME="bear"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Silently he watched it happen </div> <div> he didn't say a word</div> <div>  he saw all that happened</div> <div> he heard every word</div> <div> he didn't try to stop it</div> <div> he couldn't have anyhow</div> <div> he would keep my secret</div> <div> the event he would never tell</div> <div> when it was all over and I was alone</div> <div>  I would hold him close and talk to him about it</div> <div> a pain that was mine alone</div> <div> he would be my comfort</div> <div> my friend in the night</div> <div> he would still love me</div> <div> even though he knew it all</div> <div> he saw that I didn't want it</div> <div> he saw me try to fight</div> <div> he saw how I cried </div> <div> he heard my silent tears</div> <div> he saw that they wouldn't stop</div> <div> he watched all my horrors </div> <div> those even too bad for me to face</div> <div> he saw what happened </div> <div> while I had escaped into space</div> <div> he saw the blood stained clothes</div> <div> he heard my tears of pain</div> <div> he stood my be and stayed there</div> <div> I would never have to be alone again</div> <div> I don't have to hide fomr him because he knows my pain</div> <div> It's a shame he's just my teddy bear, </div> <div> but I love him all the same</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> NO <A NAME="no"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> You messed up my life and </div> <div> caused me pain</div> <div> you fucked with my mind </div> <div> and drove me insane</div> <div> you caused me so much guilt</div> <div> and I felt so used </div> <div> you made me feel worthless,</div> <div> like maybe my life was a waste</div> <div> I was nervous and scared </div> <div> and I never felt safe </div> <div> I cried everyday </div> <div> I forgot how to love,</div> <div> but I learned how to hate </div> <div> but now I don't feel so dirty </div> <div> or low cause it wasn't my fault </div> <div> I said no</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> No Name <A NAME="name"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Each thust tears me apart </div> <div> rips me from the inside out </div> <div> white hot pain runs amok</div> <div> this is my rape</div> <div> I write and scream and flail my legs</div> <div> which only allows the pain to go deeper, fuller inside me</div> <div> his hips bang against me </div> <div> his hands bruise me </div> <div> his voice rings in my ears </div> <div> he shrieks, his anger towards me </div> <div> the cries of a rapist violating my mind</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Felicia <A NAME="felicia"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> I know the pain you've been through</div> <div> It will affect you all of your life</div> <div> You'll go through periods of calmness </div> <div> that seems always followed by strife</div> <bR> <div> There is no way to over come it</div> <div> Not completely, I want you to know</div> <div> You'll learn to rise above it</div> <div>  But it's a really rough road to go</div> <bR> <div> People who don't know you</div> <div> will try and make it tough</div> <div> But honey, you're the only one</div> <div> who's going to make it rough</div> <bR> <div> you'll always try to hide the pain inside</div> <div> In all the ways you shouldn't</div> <div> because you blame yourself for this</div> <bR> <div> Stop the pain he's inflicked upon your very soul</div> <div> You need to rise above it</div> <div> and make yourself feel whole</div> <bR> <div> I don't know how to help you</div> <div> I didn't know how to help myself</div> <div> I can only love you </div> <div> and pray you find yourself</div> <bR> <div> It doesn't have to be this way</div> <div> you have the power to win</div> <div> you must realize my dear</div> <div> this is not your sin</div> <bR> <div> I will always love you</div> <div> your family loves you too</div> <div> let us help you stop the pain</div> <div> so that you can love you too</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> The Mask I Wear <A NAME="wear"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Why can't you see the pain</div> <div> I'm feeling inside:</div> <div> I know that it shows </div> <div> through my pride</div> <div> Just look into my eyes and you'll </div> <div> see the tears</div> <div> brought on by pain</div> <div> held close for years</div> <div> I know, I pretend</div> <div> that nothing's wrong</div> <div> I try very hard to appear to be strong</div> <div> please look behind the mask </div> <div> I wear</div> <div> I am so desperate </div> <div> for someone to care</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> My Heart <A NAME="heart"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> My heart is broken,</div> <div> My life torn apart.</div> <div> There is so much pain</div> <div> I don't know where to start.</div> <div> They took from me</div> <div> The essence of my soul;</div> <div> The fragile part</div> <div> That made me whole.</div> <div> It comes back to me</div> <div> In my heart - my mind</div> <div> A nightmare or flashback</div> <div> Of the most horrific kind.</div> <div> I kick and scream</div> <div> With all my might</div> <div> Against the men who haunt</div> <div> My dreams at night.</div> <div> The pain is real;</div> <div> I know I'm there.</div> <div> There's no one to help me;</div> <div> No one to care.</div> <div> When will it end?</div> <div> I'm starting to wonder;</div> <div> Who can break</div> <div> This spell I'm under?</div> <div> I reach out to you,</div> <div> Please take my hand.</div> <div> I need your strength</div> <div> To help me stand.</div> <div> I've been alone</div> <div> For so very long.</div> <div> I'm scared and angry -</div> <div> I'm not very strong.</div> <div> This pain I'm in</div> <div> Has crippled me.</div> <div> I need your help,</div> <div> Can't you see?</div> <div> Just help me get</div> <div> Through one more night;</div> <div> Then maybe I could</div> <div> Find the strength to fight.</div> <div> One more day</div> <div> Is all I ask</div> <div> Then I can remove</div> <div> This hateful mask.</div> <div> With your help</div> <div> I know I can find</div> <div> The strength I need</div> <div> To recover - </div> <div> have peace of mind.</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Swirling <A NAME="swirling"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> drops echo in a bucket of time</div> <div> but with their fingers in their ears</div> <div> no one will hear their own demise</div> <div> yet alone yours</div> <bR> <div> and all I hold now swirling</div> <div> captured perfectly</div> <div> like lines on a peice of peppermint candy</div> <div> I used to play there</div> <div> but now I question my sense of reality</div> <div> did "there" ever exist at all</div> <div> was that person real or imagined</div> <div> out of desperation comes</div> <div> such wonderful lifelong companions</div> <div> but they aren't flesh and blood</div> <div> so what are they</div> <bR> <div> just shadows</div> <div> just like you</div> <div> coming in</div> <div> crying to</div> <div> me</div> <div> in my corner of the room</div> <div> I wait in this womb</div> <div> not for birth</div> <div> not again</div> <div> but for what I can only imagine</div> <div> awaits me at the end</div> <div> this</div> <div> I call to thee</div> <div> the faceless but named entity</div> <div> to whom I'll never swear allegience</div> <div> so dare, I say, believe</div> <bR> <div> the flowers are wilting</div> <div> curling and crushed</div> <div> the candles are burnt out</div> <div> and everything else is dust</div> <div> I am swirling around the room</div> <div> a phantom on the wind</div> <div> a child as hard to figure as counting snowflakes</div> <div> or trying to remember all your sins</div> <bR> <div> we are so lost here</div> <div> you and I</div> <div> one plays earth</div> <div> the other is always the sky</div> <div> so where will we go</div> <div> when it's our turn to say goodnight</div> <div> I watch you from this </div> <div> world apart</div> <div> the lonely soul divide</div> <div> a lonely soul am I </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Let Me <A NAME="me"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> He hurt me - so let me</div> <div> let me shiver, let me cry</div> <div> let me hurt and let me die </div> <div> let me fall and let me scream</div> <div> let me live my nightmare dream</div> <div> let me throb and let me bleed </div> <div> let me want and let me need</div> <div> watch you bleed, watch you cry</div> <div> watch you shake as you die</div> <div> I'll let you fall, I'll let you scream</div> <div> I'll make you live my nightmare dream</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Tonight <A NAME="tonight"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> It hurts so much tonight </div> <div> like it's never hurt before</div> <div> I've given up the fight </div> <div> I'm releasing all my tears</div> <div> I can't hold it anymore</div> <div> What am I crying for?</div> <div> I should've never let it </div> <div> It ripped my sould apart</div> <div> will I ever be happy?</div> <div> What if I can't forget you?</div> <div> will I remember the horrid feelings too?</div> <div> all this pain I cry about, will it never go away?</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Broken <A NAME="broken"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> my heart's not broken</div> <div> my soul is gone</div> <div> excruciating pan fills the void</div> <div> feelings surge through my mind</div> <div> stole what was craved </div> <div> lack of love destroy</div> <div> words thrown away</div> <div> my heart's not broken</div> <div> it's just ripped apart</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> My Impurity <A NAME="impurity"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Touched me</div> <div> saw me</div> <div> knew me</div> <div> I cannot speak</div> <div> Deceived</div> <div> Set me free</div> <div> forget it all</div> <div> touched me wrong</div> <div> I cannot forget</div> <div> darck and cold </div> <div> weak and helpless; I stayed quiet</div> <div> just once it happend; millions in my mind</div> <div> this was never meant to happen</div> <div> touched me</div> <div> grotesque and wicked</div> <div> my impurity</div> <div> into the darkness, I descend</div> <div> evil and ugly; I let him hold me</div> <div> demons crawling, monsters strolling </div> <div> faces staring</div> <div> voices laughing </div> <div> dirty and defiled</div> <div> my impurity</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> No One Hears Me <A NAME="me_1"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Gasped for air</div> <div> cried for help</div> <div> screamed in pain </div> <div> no one hears me</div> <div> it's not my fault</div> <div> he fucked me up</div> <div> they don't look for it </div> <div> they cannot see</div> <div> touched wrong</div> <div> squeezed tight</div> <div> for his pleasure and delight</div> <div> they don't know</div> <div> they don't care</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> If I Should Fall <A NAME="fall"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> If I should fall, kick me hard</div> <div> throw dirt on me when I start to bleed</div> <div> step on my heand when your grasp I need</div> <div> laugh at me</div> <div> leave me scarred</div> <div> silently screaming</div> <div> cover your ears</div> <div> cover your eyes </div> <div> purging tears </div> <div> close your eyes</div> <div> think nothing of it</div> <div> they're only lies</div> <div> it twists inside my sould, it tears</div> <div> hear me begging?</div> <div> just cover your ears</div> <div> see my fear?</div> <div> just close your eyes</div> <div> I reach out to you and fall again</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> You Take <A NAME="take"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Biting and scratching at your mind</div> <div> deafens you and makes you blind</div> <div> no world</div> <div> no peace</div> <div> day is night and night is day</div> <div> bend with me now</div> <div> he took me life</div> <div> you made</div> <div> you take</div> <div> you rape</div> <div> you trapped</div> <div> you laughed</div> <div> I'll get back at you </div> <div> time's standing still</div> <div> hurting</div> <div> rip out my mind</div> <div> throw it away</div> <div> in the dark</div> <div> I smile</div> <div> I laugh</div> <div> I'll take, not your life, your mind </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Love <A NAME="love_1"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> Love is a gentle whisper flowing quietly through your veins</div> <div> love is a timelss clock; age just isn't real</div> <div> love is a look. Eye contact that causes your heart to prance</div> <div> Love makes air easier to breathe</div> <div> It's lets you smile at things you never even saw before</div> <div> Love makes you understand that whether or not you look perfect isn't important</div> <div> You don't have to strive to make him attracted to you; you just have to let him be</div> <div> love is being able to talk endlessly and never grow weary</div> <div> love is not condiering the person you love at "cute" or "pretty". </div> <div> Love is seeing them as beautiful</div> <div> You know you're in love when you see the glimmer on their face,</div> <div> the spark in their melodic eyes</div> <div> You can sense the heat and passion in their heart gone long undetected</div> <div> Love is knowing you can spend infinity with them, yet it will be never long enough</div> <div> Love is feeling like you've known them an eternity,</div> <div> when you've really only known them a short time</div> <div> You've found love when you're mate knows you you better than your parents.</div> <div> Better than your best friend or diary</div> <div> she knows everything about you, every aspect of your life, but it's not over powering</div> <div> It's soothing</div> <div> Love is knowing all those things and then embracing them</div> <div> Love is takign every portion of your beloved, </div> <div> even the infuriating things, and being delighted they're there</div> <div> for if you genuinely love her, the bad things become a gift</div> <div> they are a part of this magnificent being</div> <div> love is knowing that when you're haing a hard time, your adored will do everything</div> <div> all you have to do is....breathe.</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Life <A NAME="life"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> life rips my eyes out as I watch me bleed</div> <div> crying closed my mouth screams </div> <div> see my soul carry me away</div> <div> dying dreams come down to pray</div> <div> screaming blackness as I</div> <div> fearful glass breaks the cry</div> <div> silence shudders and it knows</div> <div> heavy wonder kills the snow</div> <div> the cross the X </div> <div> the life the death</div> <div> heaven there brings hell</div> <div> seeing life before it fell</div> <div> onmipotence lives death</div> <div> mortality only escorts the last breath</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> I Am I Bird <A NAME="bird"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> I am a bird though I cannot fly</div> <div> my screaming tears pierce the midnight sky</div> <div> my love hath left me for someone old</div> <div> yet I myself am courageous and bold</div> <div> my life is gone through tears of pain</div> <div> everything is washed away as dirt in the rain</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Night <A NAME="night_"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A> </div> <bR> <div> All Things come together in a crisis at night</div> <div> the road vanished, sadness sweeps over the people as a plauge</div> <div> blazing lights, screaming tires, obscenities slashing through the air</div> <div> slightly heard prayers, someone shrieks "I found the body"</div> <div> Seventy feet from the car all torn and bloody</div> <div> at the hospital, fast beeping, cluttered noise...and silence</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> Night Call <A NAME="call"><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="1x1.gif" HEIGHT="1" ALIGN="bottom" WIDTH="1" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" ></A></div> <bR> <div> The night is a snow owl's coo.</div> <div> When she flies, </div> <div> there is a blizzard that whips your breath away.</div> <bR> <div> Night is a shadow that deepens souls</div> <div> beneath where mortals wander.</div> <div> But as the night whispers the beauty of its name,</div> <div> the Cardinal sings its morning song,</div> <div> a single ruby red rose falling on the downy soft snow.</div> <div> Now the gallant ball of fire rises to say</div> <div> goodbye to the night whisper</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>