resident Bush signed the Congressional resolution today that gives him the authority to use military force, if necessary, to strip Iraq of biological and chemical weapons that the White House says Saddam Hussein's government has collected, and to disband Baghdad's purported nuclear weapons program.

President Bush signing into law the Iraq Resolution, surrounded by Republican Senators and the only international dignitary willing to attend ceremony

Calling the Iraqi regime "a serious and growing threat to peace," Mr. Bush signed the legislation in a ceremony in the East Room of the White House as a partisan delegation of about eight Republican members of Congress looked on.

The President had invited his international allies to attend, but only Saddam Hussein showed, in the belief the White House ceremony was a surprise party for him in honor of his election by 100% of the Iraqi voters.

The President used the opportunity to try to pressure the United Nations to adopt a new resolution compelling Iraq to submit to unconditional weapons inspections. The Security Council began its first day of open debate today on the resolution, which was written by the United States. The proposal ran into immediate opposition from Russia, which called it "unacceptable."

Iraq's Foreign Minister condemned the draft resolution as "an insult to the international community."

Despite his success in obtaining congressional approval of his resolution, at the White House this morning, Mr. Bush appeared to be backtracking from his previous strident attitude. "The opportunity to discuss this face-to-face with Saddam was a real eye-opener to me," Mr Bush declared. "He doesn't appear near as evil as Rummy and Dickie make him out to be."

"In fact, we have many things in common and we found out we can learn a lot from our respected cultures. He, appears to be real interested in American women, and he likes his booze allright. I can relate to that."

"I, on the other hand, am really interested in their style of government over there. The idea that he can get so many votes and that there is no opposition party in Iraq appeals to me a whole lot. I have asked Dick Cheney to look into that."

"Maybe we don't need to introduce a democratic form of government in Iraq if there is a regime change. Maybe it will be better for this country, and certainly the future of the Republican party, if we adopted their system here. Imagine, being re-elected President for another SEVEN year term, by a landslide vote, after all that depressing economic news. I sure could use a shot in the arm like that in two years."

"Now that I think about it, Iraq is not really such a backwards country like they tried to tell me initially, at those boring briefing meetings I had last year."

"At this point, we have agreement on a cultural exchange, and who knows what that can lead to. Maybe world peace, so I can get meself one of them Nobel prizes before I leave office."

Turning momentarily away from his new friend, Mr. Bush rounded up the handful of congressional types still roaming the White House in search of food, and allayed their concerns that the heavy-duty arm-wringing by congressional leaders might indeed have been in vain. "I have not ordered the use of force," he said. "I hope the use of force will not become necessary. Yet confronting the threat posed by Iraq is necessary, by whatever means that requires, if our diplomatic efforts lead to nothing."

"Either the Iraqi regime will give up its weapons of mass destruction, or for the sake of peace, the United States will lead a global coalition to disarm that regime," the president said.

"Of course, we may end up terribly embarrassed if it turns out that Saddam has been telling us the truth all along and he, in fact, has no such weapons."

"Not only would that make me look like a real creep, but the revelation would practically bankrupt our country. We would have to cancel Billions of Dollars' worth of military procurement orders, and Rummy would most likely shoot several new military weaponry development projects right out from under some of my very best friends."

"Shucks, that might be a worse economic disaster than the $300 tax relief check I had the IRS mail out to every citizen just before last year's election."

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The original article serving as a basis for this developing story, can be found here

The House of Representatives and the Senate voted overwhelmingly last week to give President Bush a broad mandate to act against Iraq.

The resolution approved by Congress authorizes Mr. Bush to use the armed forces "as he determines to be necessary and appropriate" to defend the nation against "the continuing threat posed by Iraq," and to enforce "all relevant" United Nations Security Council resolutions on Iraq. It requires him to report to Congress within 48 hours of any military action.

The White House had insisted that as commander-in-chief Mr. Bush already had the power to order a military strike against Iraq in defense of the United States. But he had lobbied hard for Congressional support so that he could argue to the United Nations that the country was behind him.

"The time has arrived once again for the United Nations to live up to the purposes of its founding to protect our common security," the president said. "The time has arrived once again for free nations to face up to our global responsibility and confront a gathering danger."

In a concession to Democrats, the Congressional resolution encourages the president to try to work through the United Nations before acting alone. But it still leaves him with broad latitude at act.

While lobbying hard for United Nations support, Mr. Bush also made it clear today that he was prepared to act without it.

"This nation will not live at the mercy of any foreign power or plot," he said.

In Baghdad today, a senior government official warned that if the United States attacked Iraq "every shepherd's boy and every village" would take up arms against American troops.

"Iraq has taken many precautionary measures against an American attack," Izzat Ibrahim, who as deputy chairman of the Revolutionary Command Council is second in command to Mr. Hussein. "If the U.S. administration makes a mistake and launches a war, we are going to fight them. And I don't think they can match us on the ground."

Over the last three weeks, the five permanent members of the Security Council have failed in private debate to agree on a resolution drafted by the United States demanding the return of United Nations weapons inspectors to Iraq and threatening military action if their work was hindered. Washington's draft proposal is supported by Britain, but France, China and Russia, which all hold veto power on the council, favor two separate resolutions.

As the Security Council debate began this morning, Secretary General Kofi Annan gave his support to the proposed new resolution, saying that United Nations inspectors must be allowed to return to Iraq without conditions. He urged Baghdad to take advantage of this "last chance."

"Full compliance remains indispensable, and it has not yet happened," he said. "Iraq has to comply. The inspectors must have unfettered access. This council will expect nothing less."

Mr. Annan also appealed to the Security Council to remain united.

But Russia's deputy foreign minister, Yuri Fedotov, said in Moscow today that the United States-drafted resolution is unacceptable.

"The American variant of the resolution on Iraq has not undergone changes," Mr. Fedotov said, according to the Russian news agency Interfax. "It is unacceptable and Russia cannot support it."

President Bush said today that in 1991 Iraq was given 15 days to fully disclose all weapons of mass destruction and that President Hussein "has successfully defied that obligation for 4,199 days."

"And during this 11-year period of his dictatorship, the regime has become highly skilled in the techniques of deception," Mr. Bush said. "It has blocked effective inspections of so-called presidential sites — actually 12 square miles with hundreds of structures where sensitive materials could be hidden. The regime has forged documents, disabled surveillance cameras and developed mobile weapons facilities to keep ahead of any inspector."

In Baghdad, government officials announced today that results of Tuesday's presidential election showed that Mr. Hussein had been overwhelmingly returned to power. Mr. Hussein, who was the lone candidate, received 100 percent of the votes cast, according to the government.

The United States dismissed the outcome, saying that the vote lacked any credibility.

"It is not even worthy of our ridicule," Richard A. Boucher, the State Department spokesman, said today.

In his comments today, Mr. Bush again urged the people of Iraq to rid themselves of Mr. Hussein.

"Our desire is to help Iraqi citizens to find the blessings of liberty within their own culture and their own traditions," he said. "The gifted people of Iraq will flourish if and when oppression is lifted. When Iraq has a government committed to the freedom and well-being of its people, America, along with many other nations, will share a responsibility to help Iraq reform and prosper. And we will meet our responsibilities. That's our pledge to the Iraqi people."