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Episode 8:
"Chapter 8"
Original Air Date: 12.11.00
Summarized by:
Kris D.
In a coffee house, Milton carries a stack of Shakespeare and what looks to be a latte or a cappucinno, for the foam jumps up and hits him on the nose when he closes the cup. Settling down for a long winter's nap - er, read, he is sidetracked by a beautiful young girl wearing a Harvard shirt. Insert witty banter between Harvard!Chick and Milton, about Shakespeare and a college professor named "Lieberman". Apparently, she's in Lieberman's class. They argue Shakespeare - human behavior. Yadda yadda. She claims to be 20 years old - so he invites her for a drink. How old is he? 29. When will he be 30? Not till next year. OK! (HUH?)
Roll Credits
Act I
In the teacher's lounge, Milton is discussing Harvard!Chick with Kevin and Harry. Milton claims not to be forward, that he doesn't just *ask* girls out. Kevin reminds him of a little woman named Louisa. He (and we!) thought he was dating her. He is, he's just saying... This causes Harry, who was otherwise engrossed in a magazine to look up. (Harry is, of course, in a committed relationship) Harry and Kevin share Significant Eye Contact, and Milton turns to look at Harry. Harry smiles angelically. Kevin doesn't give advice, he says, but Louisa is a pretty solid catch. Harry jumps in to remind Milton that Milt isn't quite so solid. Milton says Harvard!Chick'll probably turn out to be an axe murderer - now Harry likes her! - but that there's something contagious about her. Milton says that Louisa is great but -- Here. Louisa is standing behind him. She wants to know what the "but" is. Of course, thinking on his feet, Milton says she doesn't fish. The guys were just discussing a fishing trip and whether or not to bring girlfriends (insert Kris' little twirly dance of joy at the thought of Harry and Lauren on a fishing trip). Whatever. She just came to tell Harry that Juan Figgis' mother was picked up last night on second offense drug charges. Juan is dropping out.
No, he's not. Juan says he has no choice, Harry says he does. His mother is going up and Juan has to pay the rent - he's head of the family. Juan just wants Harry to leave him alone. Harry wants to know what social services says about all this - social services thinks they have a father. Why do they think that? "Because I told them and they're stupid." Ooookeee. Juan storms off.
Harvey is giving a strange lecture about Benjamin Franklin, birds, and kites. "I don't even know if he was actually trying to invent electricity at the time. He just had a thing about kites. Kites are fun, they fly high up into the sky like a plane. Of course, in Ben Franklin's days they didn't have planes and you couldn't fly unless you were a bird. And Benjamin Franklin, he liked birds OK but he *loved* kites. Kites have tails. And rain. Rain is wet, as you can see. So when you fly a kite in a thunderstorm, you may not get electrocuted but you will get wet." Marla wants to know if Harvey's all right. He thinks he's going to die - he feels warm and fuzzy. What can do that to a person besides death? He collapses.
Harvey's on a stretcher with an oxygen mask, Steven is telling Harvey that he's going to be OK, that he'll come to the hospital. He stays back as they wheel him down the hall. Lauren flies down the stairs calling for Harvey, and Steven restrains her. She's worried, calling for Harvey. His vitals are fine, according to Steven, but they're taking him in to check on him. He's going to the hospital, maybe Lauren should ride with him.
In Milton's Volvo, he's eating with Harvard!Chick. Actually, inhaling his food is a more apt description. She wants to know if he always eats like this - he does, especially when he's stuck in traffic and he has eight minutes to get back to school. He has to be back at one. They discuss what she wants out of a relationship - in lieu of financial stability she wants a family or a love of Shakespeare. She asks if they're having lunch because he wants to sleep with her? No, it's just rare that he finds someone who can recite Shakespeare. Why is she having lunch with him? It's hard to find a man who can recite Shakespeare, much less teach it. Is that all?
NO! Of course not. And then there's sex. To booming christmas music. "Glooooooooooooooooria. [insert latin phrase]" Woo. Shakespeare watches the festivities with an uniterested eye.
He just didn't show up to class? Scott Guber stands in front of Milton's post-lunch class incredulously. Have any of them seen him? Nope. He storms out.
In the hospital, Harvey's heart is fine. No heart attack. They're going to do some brain scans because his colleague said he was acting strange. That's his character - Lauren and Steven smile at this. He had a 104 temperature which has gone down and he's not in danger. He takes no medication - he just started feeling hot, then good, then light-headed.
In Figgis' apartment, Harry is trying to convince Juan to stay in school. 11, 7, and 4. His siblings need to eat, more than he needs a degree. Juan's sorry if he ruins some teacher bonus he had coming. Harry says he doesn't chase after every kid that drops out. Juan doesn't care, he just wants Harry to stop chasing *him*. Harry tells Juan that he's going to report them to DSS. He is required by law. Juan tells him that they'll break the family up, that Harry has a choice to tell or not to tell. Harry leaves.
Act II
At school, Harry walks with Lauren. She wants to know if he's going to tell. Of course, he has no choice. She's hurt by his short tone - "OK, you don't have to yell at me, Harry." He apologizes, he's just frustrated, apologizes again. She wants to know if she can help? No thanks.
They pass Guber and Milton - Milton's *car* broke down. That's why he didn't show up. (:::wink wink:::) He wasn't near a phone, that's why he didn't call. Buttle tries to apologize, but Guber tells him to apologize to his *class*. Guber walks away, leaving Kevin a prime opening for some gossip. "So, not only do you sleep with this 20 year-old that you met this morning, you blow off class to do it." Kevin knows him, he's not impulsive. He pencils in trips to the bathroom on his day planner. (Too much information) Kevin tries to remind Milton about Louisa *again*, but Milton says he's willing to forgo Louisa for this girl. Even if the relationship lasts only a week, it's worth it. Milton might be falling in love - even though he knows he'll end up splattered on the pavement. He felt more passion in the last hour than he has felt collectively in his whole life. D'oh!
Marilyn is grading papers when a girl comes in. The girl wants to know how Mr. Lipshultz is. He's doing OK, but they don't know what caused his problem. What's wrong? The girl wants to spill something in complete confidence, but Marilyn can't give her word that it will stay confidential, especially if it has to do with Harvey. Crying, the girl admits to putting Ecstasy in Harvey's coffee, as a joke. It wasn't supposed to have harmful side effects, yadda yadda. The girl won't tell Marilyn where she got the ecstasy, she's willing to get herself in trouble but not others.
In with Steven and Guber, Marilyn spills the beans. Kelley O'Toole (the girl who slipped him the mickey) is a straight A student, it was a prank, isn't expulsion is a bit harsh? (Marilyn, are you home up there??) Guber claims that he poisoned a teacher, Marilyn says not everything is black and white, but Guber says this is. She could have killed him. Marilyn leaves and Steven tells Guber to call the police to have her picked up. THey'll do random locker searches, the drug is getting out of hand. Guber says they should call in a few favors, send a message. Significant Eye Contact.
DRUG DOGS! And catchy rap music. Cops cutting open lockers, more drug dogs, chaos! Marilyn and Lauren stand watching the festivities, shocked. Cops escourt Kelley O'Toole out of the school in handcuffs, parading her through the halls. Marilyn and Lauren watch, still.
Milton and Harvard!Chick are now in the coffee shop. Again. Discussing the ecstasy thing. He wants to know if she's done it. No, it kills brain cells. He makes a snarky remark about her not wanting to be less intelligent than everyone else and she asks him if he sleeps with new people. Nope. Does she? Never. She wants to know why he had a condom in his wallet if he never does that. Oh, yeah, he's in a relationship. She didn't know that, didn't get that impression. It's not serious. But you sleep with her. Yes. Do you sleep with people you're not serious with? Yes. No. No. She wants him to take her home. Huh? Your home.
More SEX! This time, to "Joy to the World". Ew.
Back in the hallways, a drug dog has made a find. (Transcribers note: I have a bigger, meaner and cooler GSD than the one used in this show. Why don't they ever call me when they have these parts? Eegads..<g>) They pull a cooler out of the locker, but the police apparently don't think it's worth worrying about. He's about to put it back when Guber jumps in. He opens the cooler. Wrapped in bubble wrap (???) inside the cooler is a human foot.
Steven wants to know what the kid is doing with a human foot. It's JAMAL! Morgue!Boy. Other kids like to see dead stuff, so sometimes he brings in body parts for them to touch and stuff. He always returns it. Harry Senate, who just came in, whacks Jamal on the head with his file. What the hell are you thinking? he asks. Steven says "Harry!" Jamal tries to defend himself - at least he didn't stick the thing in some teacher's coffee. WHAP with the files again. He's in a bit of trouble. There are police officers in the next office, waiting to cart him off. Louisa comes in and tells Guber that the Gestapo made a find.
And what a find it is! A locker filled with plastic shelves and drawers, a veritable pharmacy. In his office, Guber and Steven are asking the kid to identify the drugs and how much he charges for them. He has acutane (for acne), ecstasy and R-U 486. The abortion pill. He's selling the abortion pill.
Harry is trying to make a case for Jamal in the next office. He didn't really steal the stuff, 'cause he always brought it back. See, he was confused. It's called a "footlocker". Harry tells Jamal to beat it, wait in the hall, don't leave the jurisdiction. He talks to the police guy, promises it won't happen again. He'll kick is @ss. The setback of an arrest is enough to make him quit school. The man agrees but next time, the kid is their's. Leaving the office, Harry grabs Jamal and backs him into some lockers. He tells Jamal he has another chance, though he's not sure why. He warned the kid after the incident with all the kids in the morgue - Jamal promises that...Harry breaks in, with a fury not known before, that Jamal's promises suck right now. This is his last chance, his next screw-up he goes to the police - if he lives that long 'cause Harry might kill him first. Harry also says he'll take the foot back.
In the bar, Milton and Kevin are talking. Milton is acting *weird*, he understands why a man would throw away everything for an affair. Kevin doesn't like the fact that Milton is cheating on Louisa, but Milton is one step ahead. He's breaking up with Louisa. Even if the relationship with Lisa doesn't last (and at this rate it will burn out by the end of the week), it has given him clarity about what's missing in his r'ship with Louisa.
Set to music, Harry is watching as Juan Figgis and his family are split apart by the DSS. Standing in the snow, they escort the kids to separate cars. Juan and Harry share Significant Eye Contact.
Act IIIIn his classroom, Harry is being confronted by Juan. Juan is furious about his family being torn apart (I don't blame him). Harry tells him that it was the *law*, but Juan reminds him that he breaks the rules in the classroom every damn day. He tells Harry not to be coming around trying to tell him that he's doing it for his good. Juan leaves.
A news program is on in Steven's office revealing the story about the mini-pharmacy at Winslow. Guber and Steven are pushing to have a birth-control seminar so they can tell the kids how using the pill is dangerous without a doctor. Superintendant Shinn is there and is fighting against it, but agrees eventually.
In his classroom, there is a gift on Harry's desk. The class confirms that it's a christmas present for him, from the class. Significant Eye Contact is shared amoungst the students and Harry slowly opens the gift. As he pulls the lid off, it explodes in a spray of confetti and the classroom falls to pieces laughing. "You think that's funny?" Harry is breaking down, and as he *throws* the box and paper across the room he tells his class to shut up. "That's really great. Like putting the drugs in the teacher's coffee? That's the christmas present we get from you ungrateful...Hey you wanna give me a present? Do an assignment. Do something. Because I can't do it all. I try to get you people jobs? What the hell am I doing this for anyway? The money? None of you listen, none of you even care. Why should I care? Just do whatever the hell you want." Silence reigns.
Back in the coffee house (!!!), Milton and Lisa talk about what has become their ritual - meeting for coffee before school. There's some talk about how Milton can't get enough of their sex, but she says they can't go running back to his apartment every time he gets a caffeine high, she has to go to class. Milton agrees - so does he. He's late already, by the way. She wants to know - if she said "Let's go back to your apartment" would he just skip class? No. She says he would. He says he doesn't want to make a habit out of it. Pshaw.
Hark the herald angels sing! More sex.
Nobody wants to confront MadDog!Guber after marathon sex, but Milton should think about that next time. And while he's thinking, he needs to think up another excuse. Broken car, no phone. Guber tells him to fix his car or buy a cell phone. Milton, in a moment of utter stupidity, says "Listen!" but MadDog only turns on him and says something to the effect of "If you think I care what you're gonna say, you're sorely mistaken."
Lauren catches up to Harvey in the hallway and wants to know how he's feeling. Technically, he feels better. At least healthwise. But how he feels?...he walks away. So Lauren decides to try Harry, who's rushing by. Unfortunately, Harry doesn't want to play either. He stops, says "Hey!" to Lauren, then calls to Scott. (Kris' Evil Little Gnome cannot let this transcript go by without mentionting that she was *sure* Harry was going to lean down and kiss Lauren at that moment, just to torture Scott, but it's too bad that Harry a) isn't that cruel and b) was too upset to take advantage of the prime situation <g>) He tells Lauren he'll see her and chases off after Scott.
Scott, however, has not forgiven Harry for stealing Lauren out from under him. (No pun intended) He wants to know what laws Harry has broken this time. Harry, proving he is indeed that cruel, says "Well, I got a massage from a hooker." (Which leaves Kris *and* her ELG wondering how Harry came across that information - does he *know* Marcia the Massage Therapist? Or did Steven just let that little bomb drop one afternoon?) No, Harry wants to know what Scott knows about guardianship, etc etc.
Steven is giving a speech on the RU-486 pill. It's not like taking an asprin, there can be complications and bleeding. It should ONLY be used with a doctor nearby, to perform surgery if necessary. He tells them not to be stupid, don't play with their lives. And one more thing, Ecstasy and Harvey. He says he does everything he can to make the school a citizen school. No metal detectors, no zero tolerance rules. He doesn't want his teachers to be viewed as militaristic. But if they want respect, they better damn well start respecting the teachers. To lace a teacher's coffee as a joke? It's not funny. "All of you are on notice right now. You want to start a war with us? You'll get a war, but you won't win. You won't win."
In his classroom, Harry is talking about charity. He is on speaking terms with his class again. He wants to start something called the Figgis Foundation, to help a classmate deal with a problem. The bell rings - they'll talk more about it after lunch. Lauren comes in as the class is filtering out. She's no expert on relationships, but the last one that worked - they talked to each other. Harry's not good at talking, Lauren. Figgis has him upset. See that? They don't need to talk. Harry feels like he's in one long, extended losing battle. In something of a cheap shot, Lauren questions the "foundation" thing. Tossing a pencil, Harry goes to sit at his desk. Lauren reminds him how he helped her with John LeBlonde and Carol Prader, but that she had to be open to his help. Harry is upset that Juan and his family is going to be split up - social services can't keep them together. And the charity? He doesn't know.
In the office, Milton wants to talk with Louisa. He's not terribly adept at these kinds of conversations but - he's begun to see somebody else. She understands he didn't want to mislead her. She walks away, but Milton follows her, wanting to know if she's OK. Yeah, it's not like...yeah, she's fine. OK. Is there something else, she wants to know? He says it just feels so abrupt. D'uh, hotpants. After he walks out, Louisa falls into a chair, dejected.
In the teacher's lounge, Scott is sitting alone. Lauren comes in and asks if everything is alright. He doesn't answer so Lauren asks again. He has this recurring dream about the school being under the student's control - it's no wonder with a week like this one. He has to ask "Is it just a dream? Maybe they are in charge." Lauren says no one is in charge, and that's not a criticism of his leadership or Steven's, but that this is a high school and nobody is in charge. In a monumental subject change, Scott is thinking of adopting a baby. "Wow", Lauren and I say in unison. He just wants a nucleus of hope - it would be selfish to adopt a child to fill a void, and there are obstacles, but he's thinking about it. Lauren has no words but "Good luck with it." She offers, if you ever want to talk or...he thanks her. She kisses him on the cheek and then points to the mistletoe above. "OH, yes." Scott says, as if he'd been hoping for more.
Act IV
In his car, Milton is telling Lisa that he broke up for her. He wants to know if he's kidding himself about their relatoinship - I mean, she's 20. Is she too young for him? No, feels a little out of control. So does she. He says they've made love but haven't kissed, at least not softly. She'd like that. So they kiss. (Evil Little Gnome wants to know why we're forced to witness this extreme close-up of a kiss, and Harry and Lauren are always at a 3/4 shot or farther. Hmph)
Jamal enters Harry's classroom holding a bag. Harry's afraid to ask what's in the bag, but it's $932. He was charging students to see the dead foot, and this is the money he made. He's going to give it to the Figgis Foundation. Harry says he'll take half, but Jamal insists Harry take it all.
In the teacher's lounge, Louisa comes in demanding to know why. Kevin ushers Marilyn and Harvey out, so her and Buttle can be alone. Louisa needs a reason - they were doing great. "This other woman, we're more intellectually compatible." She's smarter? "It's not a question of intelligence, Louisa? Have you ever read one of Shakespeare's sonnets?" He doesn't know if they're right, but being with her clarifies what he's missing with Louisa. Way to go, Mr. Sensitivity. Louisa jumps up and storms out.
Juan is being led into Harry's classroom by two police officers. "This is false imprisonment, what are you doing?" Juan doesn't want to listen to Harry but Harry tells him that it's possible that Juan can be appointed Guardian of his family when he turns 18. Tells him that his foundation has over $1000. The court will be looking at his maturity and staying in school would the step one. There will be obstacles, but they'll get them as they come. Juan says he still has a hard time believing what Senate says (which is odd because, as I recall, Harry has been nothing but honest to Juan) Lauren, who has been standing at the door listening, decides to involve herself. She tells Juan that one of the first signs of maturity is knowing who your friends are. She tells Juan that Harry has done nothing but fight for him the last few days. Step one, stay in school. Step two, trust him. Juan thanks Harry and then leaves. Harry wants to know "The first sign of maturity is knowing who your friends are? Did you make that up." Well, he believed it. Does Harry? She's here, you know. He does.
Steven is in his office with Guber - it's the last day before christmas vacation. Does Guber have any plans? He's taking a cruise in the meditteranian, going to Paris, going to buy a few Monets, and taking time to climb Mount Everest. And Steven? The same. So they'll see each other at school? Yup. Guber has a gift for Steven, but he's not to open it before christmas day. And Steven has a gift for Guber, who also has to wait. Merry Christmas. They hug.
Buttle is walking down the hall when he sees a student leaning against a locker. With glasses. But, wait for it...it's LISA! Harvard!Chick. She has something to tell him. She doesn't go to Harvard, she goes to Winslow High. What? She's a senior and she's never been in one of his classes. She's had a crush on him for 2 years. LISA! For God's sake! Why? It's just so hard to find a man who can recite Shakespeare. She doesn't want to stop seeing him, but Milton is stunned.
Lauren comes down to the Dungeon to see Harry. It's snowing, is he almost ready? He has snow tires, don't worry. Firestone. A woman comes into the classroom - Gladys Crenshaw. Jamal's mother - his father too for that matter. Harry wants to know if she's come for the money. What? Never mind. She tells him "I don't know if you know what kind of effect you've had on that boy. But I do. SEnding him to go work in a morgue. And I'm here to say thank you. I have been trying so long to get that boy to learn, to care. And no matter what I -- I'm proud of what I see him becoming. I'm grateful to you. You must be some teacher." Harry thanks her and she leaves. He turns to Lauren and asks if she's ready. She smiles. "Yeah." She starts to walk out, but Harry is standing still. He begins to shake and breathe heavily - he's starting to cry. Sensing it, she moves to him, pulling him towards her. As he really starts to cry, he moves into her arms and buries his face in her neck. She whispers soothingly to him and tries to comfort him. They hold each other as the camera moves off.
Roll Credits.
