Card Sharks

"And our opening poem was sent in by..."

Click here to see more opening poems, and click here to contribute a few more.

Ace is high
Deuce is low
Call it right
And win the dough
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

And with those words, Card Sharks debuted on NBC at 9:00am ET on April 24, 1978. This poem was used for the first seven weeks, after which announcer Gene Wood came up with a few his own:

Call the cards
Make your play
Bet 'em right
Go all the way!
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Shuffle, cut, deal and play
Someone's going to win today
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces twinkle
Deuces flash
Any card
Can win the cash
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Forget the color
Forget the suit
Call high or low
And win the loot
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

You can't win trips
You can't win furs
But lots of cash
Can all be yurs
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Cross your fingers
Cross your toes
And hope your cards
Are highs and lows
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Host Jim Perry wasn't too thrilled with those poems. He said of the last one, "Cross your fingers, cross your toes? Any more poems like that I'm going to hold my nose!" Soon after that one, Jim asked the home audience if they could do any better. Poems came in by the truckload, and Gene started using them on the show, and Jim would mention the name, hometown, and NBC affiliate (I'm surprised Millionaire and Weakest Link never did so this regularly in their network runs). Some efforts where better than others...

Call the cards right
And you'll need a shotgun
To guard the cash you'll win
From Goodson-Todmun
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Deuce is a saint
Eight is a sinner
If luck is a lady
You'll go home a winner
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

The ace is high
The deuce is low
Now let's meet Jim
And start the show
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

The sky is blue
The wind is strong
There goes the sailboat
Sailing along
On Card Sharks?

Aces are lust
Deuces you trust
Call them wrong
And you will bust
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

You can swear at a seven
And curse at an eight
But don't pick on Gene Wood
His poems are great
(At last, someone with taste) on Card Sharks!

Call the cards
Don't let 'em fool ya
Call them right
And the win the moolya(?)
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Sixes are bad
Sevens are worse
Higher or lower?
It's your cherse
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

If the cards
Obey your command
You can win
Over 20 grand
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces are high
Deuces are low
If you call them wrong
Away you'll go
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

There was a man named Lee
Didn't know a two from a three
Yet odd as it seems
Won cash by the reams
Now he owns part of NBC
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

To win a lot of money
You don't have to be a whiz
Jim Perry hands it out gladly
'Cause he knows it isn't his
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

The ace is a lulu
The deuce is true blue
But don't go cuckoo
If you make a boo-boo
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Hey diddle diddle
The eight's in the middle
Should you call higher or lower?
That's the big riddle
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

With an ace, it's lower
With a deuce, it's higher
But turn over a seven
And it's ee-ther or aye-ther
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Yell higher, yell lower
And hope that you're right
Don't fret if you're wrong
Jim Perry won't bite
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Shuffle the deck
Deal the cards in a hurry
Then place your bet
With our host, Jim Purry?
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

If you know when to play
Or when to pass
You can earn enough
For a tank of gas
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Draw a deuce or an ace
And it's "okay"
But draw a seven or eight
And it's "oy vey"
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Even with an ace
You could still be in trouble
If the next card you get
Comes up double
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Freeze on a eight
Don't try to bluff
On this show
Eight is enough
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

The beds may not be made
There may be dishes to do
But just relax and wait
Till our show is through.
Watch Card Sharks!

Higher? Lower?
What the heck
I like the gals
Who serve the deck
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Call the cards right
And it's steak and lobster for you
But call them wrong
And you'll be dining on stew
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

When you get to the Money Cards
And it's time for the Big Bet
Remember, you cut the cards
So what you see is what you get
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Fortune is a fickle dame
She isn't always fair
You bet your dough on high or low
And she hits you with a pair
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Play your cards right
And you'll win some more
Play your cards wrong
And you're out the door
Oooooooooon CARD SHARKS!

Jim Perry and Gene Wood
Are might fine spielers
But they don't compare
To the beautiful dealers
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Sevens and eights don't give you much leverage
But with aces and deuces, you'll do better than everage
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Even when betting it all
Seems like a must
Hold back $50
In case you bust
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Jim Perry and Gene Wood are great
Janice and Lois are delightful ladies
Only the poems need improving
In the 1980s
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces are fantastic
And so is a king
But when they come in pairs
Disaster they bring
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

There once was a gambler from Reno
Who lost at blackjack and keno
He always got burned
'Til he finally learned
There was a much better casino
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

An ace is high
A duece is low
If you don't know how to bet them
You're on the wrong show
This is Card Sharks!

If a deuce turns up
Then take a flyer
It's 48 to 1
That the next card is higher
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Winning the game is difficult
In fact, it's downright hard
But the thing that really puzzles me
Is how they shuffle those cards
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

Hail to thee, Jim Perry
Emcee extraordinare
Who handles guests and questions
With wit and charm to spare
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

There's one thing about which I'm not sure
Are all the contestants short
Or is Jim more than 6-feet-4?
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

The children are yelling
And the dog loudly barks
But I just tune them out
When it's time to watch Card Sharks!

Jim Perry is handsome, cute, fair
But most contestants really don't care
They'd rather see aces
In just the right places
Than run their fingers through his dark hair
Oooooooooon Card Sharks!

One hundred people were surveyed
Only thirty-one he could carry
So how can Richard Dawson
Keep knocking our own Jim Perry?
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces are great
Deuces are good
But it wouldn't be fun
Without Perry and Wood
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Someone could win
With some skill and some luck
Twenty-eight thousand
And eight hundred bucks
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces or deuces are welcomed with glee
Kings and threes aren't bad to see
But a card in the middle like a seven or an eight
You'd better say "freeze" before it's too late
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Some contestants are cute
Some contestants are funny
But the object for all
Is to win the big money
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

Aces high
Deuces low
Let's make some money
And go go go
Ooooooooooon Card Sharks!

That last poem was used on the final show on October 23, 1981, but Jim got so caught up in the audience's ovation that he never did read the name of the viewer who wrote this one. CS returned in 1986, but the closest they ever came to an opening poem in that version was one written by Mark Goodson himself, which he presented in a surprise cameo early in the series.

When I got out of bed today
For some crazy reason I wanted to say hooray
I felt like bringing a verbal bouquet to Card Sharks
You know, I've created so many games
I've forgotten their names
But this is the new kid on the block
So I just put my key in the lock
And I came over to say hello
Look, I'm the boss, how can you say no?
I confess that Card Sharks gives me a kind of a special blast
Mainly it's the game, partly it's the cast
I get a kick from those questions that probe how people really feel
I love to second-guess the turn of the cards that our lovely dealers deal
And I'm tingled by these lovely dealers, lucious Lacey and saucy Suzanna
Who work hand-in-hand with our top banana
But Bob is my favorite guy
He's a performer with a senstive eye
He's an emcee whose laid-back and cool
He knows how far a host can go, he never acts the fool
While I can't mention everyone here
Let me offer a special cheer
To the off-camera set
The guys and gals who really pilot our jet
There's producers Chester Feldman, Mimi O'Brien, and Jonathan--who happens to be my son
Director Paul Alter, Andy Felsher the AD, they all help to make it fun
And there's the fabulous CBS crew
We'd be up the creek without you
And having used up all this expensive time
And praised you all in my rickety rhyme
I'm gonna end on a rather sour chime
Nobody here is gonna get an extra dime

The opening poem who never implemented at all in the 2001 revival (or failed attempt at same), so it is clearly a lost art.

As Jim used to say, we'll be right back after this message of importance!

Card Sharks is a trademark of FremantleMedia, Inc. No challenge of ownership to either Fremantle or NBC is implied. Logo courtesy of Jay Lewis.

And now, back to the Game Show Warehouse!