Piper: Leo, you haven't kissed me in over a week. Don't you think maybe that takes priority?
Piper: It's like destroying lives is how they amuse themselves.
Phoebe: Don't you just love cell phones?
Phoebe: It's amazing how much stress you can project with so few words, Prue. I will have your precious car home momentarily.
Prue: Hey, did you find out anything more from her?
Phoebe: Name rank and serial number.
Phoebe: You know, silver shiny things that go jingle jingle.
Piper: Well, maybe it's time we tell her about Santa.
Piper: Why are you being so stubborn about this?
Phoebe: Because I'm a Scorpio. What's your excuse?
Phoebe: Now look what you did. You went and turned Prue into the middle child.
Phoebe: 'Cause I don't wanna be out stubborned by a Gemini.
Prue: Okay, so why isn't there anything in the Book Of Shadows?
Phoebe: Because the Book Of Shadows was written by adults.
Piper: It's your little lawyer boyfriend.
Phoebe: So there. And he is not my boyfriend.
Cole: Who's not your boyfriend?
Phoebe: Um... the mailman.
Piper: Or it proves that one of us had a really fertile imagination and the other two were really big copycats.
Piper: I'm not really all that motivated to go dig up demons.
Phoebe: Trolls.
Piper: It means that the "powers that be" haven't done anything but ruin my life so therefore I'm not gonna do anything for them anymore, okay.
Phoebe: Well, I don't know if this is gonna help but Prue and I are very in touch with our inner children.
Abby: (About Prue and Phoebe) They've been acting like kids since they got here. I didn't serve them, I swear.
Piper: Hi. Lost your minds?
Phoebe: Yeah, and you know what we did? We saw a fairy and she was very cute and she was sparkly and she was really, really pretty.
Piper: Okay, what ass-backward spell did you guys cast?
Prue: We-we-we didn't cast a spell.
Phoebe: No, it is true, we did not use a spell but we did use fairy dust.
Piper: Fairy dust?
Piper: Okay, great, so you can go home now and reverse it, Tinkerbell.
Phoebe: No, no, no. No, I am not a fairy. She thought I was a... We have to show her. Okay.
(Phoebe pulls a small pouch out of her pocket and they get a pinch of fairy dust out of it.)
Phoebe: Dat did not work.
Piper: No. Work, that's a very good idea. I'm gonna get back to work now.
Phoebe: Oh, you know what? You are being a big, big, big, extra, extra, extra, double big jerk right now.
Piper: No. You guys are going home and you're not driving either 'cause someone will think you're drunk or something. So go outside and wait there and I will call a cab.
Phoebe: Geez, Louise, there are too many doorways in this house.
Phoebe: Number 1 or number 2?
Prue: He has to go tootie.
Phoebe: Pwue, that was a very, very big troll.
Prue: That wasn't a troll, that was a demon.
Phoebe: Okay, well, where does that fit into this story?
Prue: He was after the Book Of Shadows.
Phoebe: Alright, well, you know we can't really worry about him now 'cause we have to get to Kate.
Cole: I mean, I thought you were, I don't know, drunk or something before but now you seem...
Prue: Sober. Stairs can be sobering.
Phoebe: Stairs can be sobering?
Prue: Okay, what was I supposed to say? That some unknown demon came in to try and steal our magic book and then little trolls came and pushed us down the stairs?
Piper: You need a diaper change?
Piper: The tooth fairy's gonna come and harass us all for not flossing?
Piper: You better run while you can, you little rodents. I bet you guys think this is real funny don't ya? Haven't you taken enough from me? You have to send trolls to kick me while I'm down. I had a nice normal life once and you took that from me. You took my boyfriend, you took my life, the least you could do is leave me... my freakin' car keys. I am a good person, I am a good witch and damn it I would've made a great wife. And how dare you take that from me. I deserve... no, you know what? I demand that you send him back to me. You hear me? Right now. I am going to stand in this very spot until you send Leo back to me.
Prue: She said that she was coming, right?
Phoebe: What'd you think I just made that part up?
Phoebe: You've really gotta lay off the rhyming, Prue.
Piper: Fine, whatever.
Prue: (mimicking Piper) 'Fine, whatever.'
Phoebe: What good is this power if I can't use it when I need it?
Prue: Phoebe, you have to focus.
Phoebe: Prue, I am focusing, believe me.
Prue: You're too upset, so take a deep breath...
Phoebe: I can't levitate when I want to, I can't premonition when I want to...
Phoebe: Troll central.
Prue: It looks like they're trying to start a fire, although I don't really think that it's for roasting marshmallows.
Prue: Piper, run.
Piper: Run? Run where?
Prue: Just run, Piper, run!
Piper: Are you out of your mind?
Prue: Freeze the flames! Now that is just the way I like my trolls, medium-well.
Phoebe: Ow.
Piper: Yep.
Prue: Ice?
Phoebe: Bed.
Piper: I know, it's okay. I'm actually beginning to understand why they don't want witches and Whitelighters to be together. Marriage is, um, hard enough, you know. But marriage to a Whitelighter... He's gotta orb out at all times of the night and sometimes he's gone for weeks at a time. But honestly if I'm gonna have a meltdown every time I have no idea where he is, then none of us are gonna be able to do our jobs. And if we had lost that little girl tonight...
Phoebe: But we didn't.
Piper: But we could've. And I don't think I could live with that. If that means that I have to give up Leo, then I guess that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
Phoebe: Does that mean you guys can get married now?
Prue: Ugh...
Phoebe: What? I wanna know.
Leo: Not yet. It means they're giving us a chance to prove we can make it work.
Phoebe: What do you mean? Like probation?
Phoebe: Are you worried?
Prue: When are you going to learn? I am always worried
Phoebe: Unknown, unattractive demon on the loose.
Prue: I think that the least that they deserve is one night worry free romance don't you?
Phoebe: Mmm, romance, uhh.
Phoebe: Save you the trouble of having to talk to me.
Cole: Why would I ever not want to talk to you?
Phoebe: I don't know, you know, just incase you thought I was a drunk or a lunatic or a drunk lunatic.
Cole: I think I'm gonna go with mystery. One I'm looking forward to figuring out.
Phoebe: Okay, um, I'm going to go then and, uh, be mysterious.
Cole: I'll call you.
Phoebe: I will answer.
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