Are all Girls Inherently Bisexual?

Another TV girl-on-girl, Trill-on-Trill, lip-fest!They have to be. It's the only answer I have. How else am I able to wrap my mind around the increasingly common occurrence of females wrapping themselves around each other for three periods of National League Tonsil Hockey action every other weekend? But is it cultural, scientific or just the people I hang around with? Let's have a look.

Women's bodies are more attractive than men's. No really they are. Men's bodies do OK until you get below the waist. Then it all goes downhill very rapidly. I have a penis and I can't take it seriously so how can I expect anyone else to? Women don't have this stupid appendage they get curves instead. Nice shapely, smooth curves that are easy on the eye. Everyone is attracted to curves. What's a better car, a Porsche or an eighties Ford Falcon? What's sexier, the compact disc or the cassette tape? What's tastier the Kingston or the Shortbread Cream? You'll go with the rounded one every time. Everyone likes something slightly curved. When you want to run your hands over something for the pure tactile pleasure you would have to go for the female body every time.

Not only do women have more aesthetic bodies, they also know what to do with them. Men's bodies are easy with instructions along the line of 'grab at this point and pull'. You could train a monkey to do it, just ask MJ. Women's bodies are a little trickier. The only true way to know how to play a women's body is to put in a lot of hours with a very patient and vocal young lady or be born with one. First time heterosexual copulations are most often messy, uncoordinated and for one of the partners unfulfilling. First time homosexual encounters I?ve heard are the complete opposite. If you can play the piano then you can play with anyone else's, own a clarinet and you have no hope the fingering just isn't the same you know?.

That's the biology out of the way so let's talk about culture. Chicks who dig chicks are no longer a male fantasy prescribed with XXX. It's primetime. Xena, Kerry, Ally, Rachel, Paul Mac videos and finally (sob, sob) Willow. You can't see a film, watch TV, read a book or look at a magazine without being confronted with women going at each other hammer and tongs, or at least seeming to want to. I don't think the media is causing the behaviour. We only watch and enjoy. You can show any person Big Brother but it takes and idiot to sit down and enjoy it. By showing Ally go at Ling and Jennifer Aniston pash Winona Ryder it is encouraging behaviour that is already biologically inclined and making it socially acceptable. If the Icons are doing it then so can you.

It is not a new idea but it has certainly a more socially acceptable one. Men for some reasons do not have their own sexuality threatened by two girls making out. A girl could go into a club and kiss every person in the place and barely raise an eyebrow. Within ten seconds of a guy giving it a shot, he would be outside swiftly having the shit kicked out of him by nearly everyone in the place. Talk about social inequality.

Then there is the simple fact that women are much nicer to kiss than men.And you can take that statement to the bank. No beard rash to worry about, softer, fuller lips and no washing machine action. It's really no wonder why girls are goin' the snog with each other every chance they get.

There is one final point to make. This op ed isn't an attack. It's simply a statement to rationalise certain behaviour I have witnessed to over the last few years. It could just be the social circles I shuffle around in, but I doubt it. If it were the case we wouldn't have seen Jen share spit with Winona on prime time. The clumsy phrase 'Lesbian chic' comes to mind, but I don't want to label things. The simple fact is that for the pure hedonistic value women are getting it on with other women. Not that I'm complaining, but if they start with each other then that's even less of a chance for me. And I need every chance I can get.

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