There once was a chimera so fair
That his beauty was too much to bear
Princess wanted him badly
Pursued him quite madly
'Til Gourry warned her off with a glare

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A swordsman, a mistake he had made
If the shaman desired to be laid
His surprise was quite clear
As Zel said with a leer
In me you may sheath your blade

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There once was a girl from Seyruun
Who was a great 'Justice' buffoon
Was quite shocked to find
That her beau (in her mind)
Bed a swordsman many times in a moon

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Perhaps sensing something amiss
Lina woke from dreams of Gourry and wedded bliss
Crept close to the fire
And near did expire
When she saw his lips touch Zel's in a kiss

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Zelgadis, a blue-skinned chimera
Had taken far more than he could bear-a
Thrust Lina from Gourry
Snarled He's mine, don't you see
And, I certainly don't want to share-a

(Yeah, yeah, I know, but you try to find something that rhymes with 'Chimera' ^_~)

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Atop a pole as high as a mountain
She said Zel loves me, it is just, it is certain!
Her heart gave a lurch
And she fell from her perch
When Zel hugged Gourry below by the fountain

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A princess, brunette and petite
Thought a shaman really quite sweet
Offered herself as dessert
Cried when she heard him assert
Sorry, blond swordsman is my preferred treat

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Parading around in Zel's head
Was the choice on whom he should bed
Miss Justice for all
Or blond, buff, and tall
Choice is clear, justice sucks, buff instead

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Lina bought a nice skirt and a sweater
For the swordsman she hoped they would get her
But, he said to the sorceress
Hey Lina, pretty dress
But, on Zel I believe it'd look better

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There once was a swordsman so bold
To love a chimera so cold
Took him to bed
Gave him plenty of head
'Til Zelgadis declared Why, I'm sold!

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When Amelia asked him to wed
Zel smiled but then shook his head
Said Can't do it, you see
I love Gourry; he loves me
And with you I'd soon wish I were dead

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Told "from these two choose a mate for the shaman"
The typical Slayers yaoi fan
Will say swordsman or princess?
No need to convince us
Princess should fall under a ban

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Blue-skinned shaman and tall, blond swordsman
Told Lina the sorceress she can
Forget marrying Gourry at all
In a rage she then screamed Fireball!
But they ducked and hand in hand quickly ran