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 HASH MAG ARCHIVE 1996: RUN NO.639 Run Date: 5 February 1996 The Run That Never Was It's finally happened after twelve years: The weather beats Drake H3, and with the new committee just in place. Going downhill already! Balmy, damp, Plymouth was a world away from Trowlesworthy Warren, where several inches of snow and half a blizzard made driving an interesting experience. No other idiot will turn out tonight methinks. Wrong! At 7.20pm through the snow came the nutters; first Sub and Tinks followed by Rover for his second run in five months (he knows how to pick them!), then Anoni and Mudflaps. Tinks put us all to shame by emerging from a warm car to have a brisk scamper in the snow. Nobody joined her. At 7.28pm the hares arrive and skid to a halt. Fluff Diver jumps out: "I DIDN'T THINK ANY EFFING IDIOT WOULD BE OUT ON AN EFFING NIGHT LIKE TONIGHT BUT THOUGHT I'D BETTER CHECK AND HERE YOU ALL ARE, IT TOOK ME AND HEINZ FIVE AND A HALF EFFING HOURS TO LAY THIS YESTERDAY, IT'S EIGHT MILES LONG AND YOU CAN'T SEE IT, I'M NOT RUNNING IT TONIGHT, YOU PLEASE YOURSELVES, I'M OFF TO THE PUB!". At 7.29 the hares slip/slide away at high speed. For once we agree the hares have got it right and follow them. Two pints of 'Royal Oak' later I knew I had made a wise decision, and am bold enough to berate that spineless wimp-out, Zippy, who had come straight from home to the pub with Gnasher and Medlock. He was doing his 'Heavy Stud' bit for the benefit of the barmaids, who remained singularly disinterested. Yakki, who half made it to the start, turned up with hash mags and a new address list. She is obviously taking her 'Hash Dogsbody' role very seriously, to the extent that she and Heinz are going to replicate this week's aborted run for Run No.640. Watch this space. Mudflaps had raised the ire of the owner of Vixen Tor (one of life's more sensitive souls) with the trail of three weeks ago and had to placate her with cakes, chocs, sherry etc etc. Maybe Snakehips can list the sensitive areas in a future hash mag - and then I won't mention catching him sneaking out of the Royal Oak pub at 7.40pm after a two hour session! Royal Oak beer certainly makes people chatty: When Rover was halfway through his second pint he announced he was going for the 'Tom Cat Op.'. This was greeted with some mirth and unkind sniggers given the ages of his offspring (seventeen, fourteen, four & one year). Surely his wife just needs a bolt on the bedroom door. Anoni revealed he'd had the 'unkindest cut of all' years ago and has enjoyed a very relaxed life since. Mudflaps didn't hear any of this but Tinks did, and it was sufficient for her to reveal that Sub is falling down on the job. He hasn't produced the goods for ten days and didn't seem to be interested, in fact, it seems he would just as soon settle for another Guinness. Zip offered Tinks his services but she wasn't interested - she'd seen it before. On the way out of the pub someone pointed out that this year's committee had already exceeded last years in one aspect at least: After one week it still had a GM! But watch this space if the lottery comes up.............. PS A hash mag with no mention of Deadly - Great! The old git has rejoined Tamar Valley Hash House Harriers - snow bound roads at Princetown had nothing to do with his absence, it was all those comments in last week's hash mag that finally did the trick! STOP PRESS: MASS RESIGNATIONS AT TAMAR VALLEY H3 STOP ALL JOINING DRAKE H3 STOP
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