Copyright 1998 -- Robert Baer Jr. Revised 2000. D. J. Entry - "Sabatoge!" W A R N I N G ------ D I S C L A I M E R This following story is PURE FICTION, it REALLY DIDN'T HAPPAN only in my mind. This posting is for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN TOO SERIOUSLY --- it represents a struggle of the mind. The Dinosaur Chronicles: Once upon a time in cyberspace roamed a dinosaur, but not an ordinary dinosaur, a Computer Dinosaur! One who thinks "webs" are for spiders and a website" is a spider condo. How does a ten-ton "computersaurus" survive in this fast paced world, read on and see in another entry of his journal Entry # 165 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Today was a complete disaster. It all started this morning when I took a stroll over to my garden. I had worked long and hard on it and was looking forward to a good crop of vegetables. This happy dream was shattered when I walked up the hill, and saw a horrible sight. Someone or something had ruined my beautiful garden! They dug up all my seedling rows, poured motor oil all over the tilled soil and spray painted "Gotcha Big Lizard" on the white fence on the far side of the property. I couldn't believe my eyes, all my labors destroyed in one morning, I was wondering who would do such a terrible deed when a loud, familiar voice sounded above my head "How do you like the decorating job we did on your landscape, Dino-brain?" I slowly looked up, and there on a rise overlooking their handywork were two pterodactyles, Romulas and Remus, my old enemies from my college days. "Why did you do this to me?" I shouted at them,"you ruined my garden last summer, too!" "it's so much fun to make you suffer," Romula squawked,"and besides, you can't do a thing about it!" "Yes!" Remus exclaimed,"you're such a wimp, that's why you'll never be REAL MEN like us!" "Where's the REAL MEN at?" I questioned,"all I can see are two children who never grew up yet!" "SHUT UP!" Romulas screamed,"you could never do anything right! That's why you're divorced now!" "Yeah," Remus snorted,"you'll never be cool, like us!" I mumbled under my breath,"Thank God!" "What was that?" the male angerly snarled. "Well, at least I graduated college!" I shouted,"you two were kicked out!" "SHUT UP, LIZARD LIPS!" screamed Romulas."OR I'LL DIVE BOMB YOU AGAIN!" "You two have done that to me enough!" I said sternly,"you're not exactly pigeons, you know!" Upon hearing that, the two pterodactyles smiled and then laughed outloud. "Go away, you guys, I just wish you'd leave alone," I pleaded,"haven't you done enough to me already?" "NO!!!" the two shouted in unison. "Pestering you is a full time job!" Remus chorted. "If you had a full time job, junior,you two wouldn't have to keep hitting your parents up for money all the time!" I calmly explained with a smile. With that, Romulas gave me a dirty look and Remus gave me the middle claw. "Primitive as always," I answered back,"now go away and leave me alone!" With that, the two pterodactyles took flight, with Remus saying "no female will ever want a loser like you, especially your female human friends!" As I watched them fly away, I fought the urge to throw a couple boulders at them! I just shook my head in frustration when I heard from behind me a soft voice saying "don't worry big guy, it'll be alright." It was the Computer Counsellor, "where did you come from?" I asked. "I came up here as soon as I heard the comotion, I hid behind this tree when you arrived," the Counsellor explained. "So you heard everything, didn't you," I said, feeling rather embarassed. "Yes I did, C.D. and those two winged menaces are wrong!" the Counsellor said as she looked into my sad eyes,"I care about you, dinosaur, and I always will!" "Thank you, Counsellor" I said,"you always say the kindest things to me." Just then I heard the flapping of wings in the distance. "DIVE BOMB!!" the two pterodactyles screamed as they started to swoop down toward us. "That's enough!" shouted a voice in the distance. It was the Computer Renegade and he brought a few friends with him: The Computer Gila Monster, Xeren Zzoom and Wanna Talk. The Renegade produced a device out of his pocket, aimed and pushed one of it's "buttons." The device sent out a loud shockwave and it caused the two pterodactyles to fly "off course" and crash into a nearby apple tree. The Gila Monster was waiting there with his two-by-four in hand saying,"want me to help you out of that tree? Hold still and I'll knock you two out in no time!" The two pterodactyles struggled out of the tree and flew away crying,"We've gonna tell mommy on you, dinosaur!" "Childish, aren't they?" I said with a silly grin on my face. "Yes, they are," the Renegade said,"most pterodactyles are that way." "Are those friends of yours?," Wanna Talk asked,"with friends like that, who needs enemies?" "My garden is ruined again," I said sadly,"now what do I do?" "I have an idea!" Xeren said,"why not just grow cave mushrooms? I noticed you already have some in your basement, with a little help, you can fix up the entire downstairs for growing lots of mushrooms. You do like mushrooms, don't you dinosaur?" "I sure do!" I exclaimed,"and those two bird-brains can't ruin them!" "We'll all pitch in and help!" the Counsellor said as everyone nodded their heads in agreement. "Thank you," I said,"you're the best friends a dinosaur ever had!" "Takes one to know one!" the Counsellor replied as everyone walked down the hill toward my cave. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ End of Entry