Copyright 1998 -- Robert Baer Jr. D J -- The Picnic W A R N I N G ----------------------- D I S C L A I M E R ---------- The story that follows is PURE FICTION, it DIDN'T REALLY HAPPAN (only in my mind) It's NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN TOO SERIOUSLY ... well, you D.J. regulars know the rest of it. The Dinosaur Chronicles: Prologue: In the vast universe known as cyperspace there lives a dinosaur, not just any dinosaur, a Computer Dinosaur. A dinosaur who thinks a mouse is something a cat chases and the Internet is the opposite of the "Outer Net." A relic from the past, a throwback to a bygone era. How does a 10 ton dinosaur cope with the modern world, read on and see......... Entry # 135 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Today was a very special day for me, because I was invited to a picnic with many of my friends. When I arrived at the campground, everyone else was already present. Sitting around a warm, cousy campfire were the Computer Counsellor, Xeren Zzoom, The Computer Gila Monster, The Computer Renegade and two surprize guests, the lawyers Ben Maddog and Prairie Mason! I put my large picnic basket beside the others and took my place in the circle. The Renegade whispered in my ear that he personally invited Judge Blanche Vito but she declined because she had a "mess" to clean up at home. Soon everyone was having a good time, all the "humans" were roasting hotdogs and marshmellows on sticks, the Gila Monster found an anthill nearby, the "lawyers" were chowing down on Kibbles 'N Bits while I tried to roast a cabbage, but not too successfully. The campfire conversation started out well enough, Ben Maddog told me that after my court appearance in LIMBO, Col. Crispies Snack Food company wanted me to be their official spokesdinosaur. Prairie Mason added that he was trying to negotiate a place on the talk show circuit to crusade for larger restrooms. Xeren Zzoom told everyone how he sold his "cookie recipe" to the CIA and that he had heard that crates of his "chocolate chip cookies" were headed to Iraq. The Gila Monster joked with Xeren about going to the peanut museum in Plains, Georgia. But the event that triggered to most excitement was the appearance of another surprize guest. Running through the trees was a lady in a pink jumpsuit who shouted "I'm here, everyone!" "it's Wanna Talk!" I said happily. "That's right, Mr Dinosaur!" she shouted as she pointed at the Renegade,"I should be really mad at you for zapping me to Washington, but it was the best thing that's ever happaned to me! I'm working for the White House Staff, and boy am I having FUN! Speaking of fun, you're kinda cute! Wanna go for a walk in the woods? You tall, dark and handsome man!" "Not me!" the Renegade snorted as he suddenly stood up,"Stay away from me, crazy lady!" "C'mon Zorro-man!", Wanna begged,"live a little, I'm a good listener and... what's the matter, are you married?" "No, and I have no intention of marrying", the Renegade roared,"I want nothing to do with that! I don't want to end up like the Dinosaur and ...." The Renegade stopped in mid-sentence. I lowered my head to the ground and didn't notice that everyone was starring at me. The Computer Counsellor gently put her hand on my front foot and looked at the Renegade. It must've been an icy stare, I could tell by the Renegade's facial expression. All the picnicers were silent, the rest were still watching me, I was trying not to cry. "Let's take a walk to the river, I really think we need to talk," the Counsellor said softly to me. The two of us stood up and walked toward a clearing in the woods. As I left the campsite, I could hear the others scoulding the Renegade for what he had said. "I guess I ruined the picnic," I said sadly. "No No," the Counsellor said,"this wasn't your fault" "Neither was the divorce!", I said,"I tried my best to be a good husband, I worked hard and tried to give her everything she wanted, but now..." "But now all that has changed," the Counsellor finished,"and you are still having trouble dealing with it, aren't you? I know, big guy, I've been there myself, remember? Do you miss her?" "No!" I said loudly,"not at all, but I'm worried." "About what?", the Counsellor inquired. "About the future," I calmly explained,"I don't know if I could ever love again, I don't ever know what love is anymore. I thought I knew what love was once, but now that's been shattered" "There is no easy definition for love, my enourmous friend," the Counsellor said as she put her hand on my shoulder,"I know how you feel. I still feel that way sometimes. I'm not in a relationship right now, and I don't know if I want to be. I've dated since the divorce, but I still haven't found anyone I'd like to settle down with. There's nothing wrong with your feelings, big guy, and don't think that you have to "jump into" another relationship so quickly. Give yourself some time, you'll heal." "But ever since I was young, it's like everyone "expects" you to get married, raise a family, and I wanted to be like everyone else," I elaborated, "few of my friends thought I could even get a date, let alone get married. I was so proud of my wife, I loved her with all my heart. I would've given her anything she wanted, but the thing she wanted was her "freedom." "Listen, C.D.," the Counsellor said softly,"I think you really should see me again in my office, soon. But there's been some good come out of this hasn't there?" I thought and said,"Yes, there has been one good thing come out of all this. At first, I felt very alone. It's not easy for a dinosaur to make friends. I would sit in my empty cave and wonder when the pain would go away. Then, I got on the WISe, and met so many wonderful people. My new friends have really helped me to feel "alive" again. Even those who disagree with me I count as good friends, I've learned so much talking to them. I wish there was a way that I could tell them how much I appreciate their kindness." The Counsellor looked at me and said,"I think you just did." End of entry ---------------------------------------------------------------------------