From: Robert Baer Jr. To: jara@netreach.net ; trmwork@dynasty.net ; fronie@hotmail.com ; rcbrown@cyberzone.net ; purrple@hotmail.com ; ktimmins@neumedia.net ; panther1@axion.net ; Moses32@juno.com ; karissaricel@hotmail.com ; rhammond@silverlink.net ; glynnan@hotmail.com ; marnb@juno.com ; cook@citlink.net ; mouse4355@centuryinter.net ; rochowiz@hotmail.com ; dboyles@wvwise.org ; aac@athenet.net ; troy4him@hotmail.com ; pjames@turboweb.net.au ; juviedaman@yahoo.com ; wgw@neumedia.net ; mamabear@execpc.com ; deborahgarrett@hotmail.com ; rsakins@juno.com ; greeneyz@ciaccess.com ; Prayin@hotmail.com ; YESHUASbutterfly@hotmail.com ; dmorse02@strato.net ; hilliers@thezone.net ; godslittlest7@webt.net ; arlizard@timesnet.net ; wmendez@nauticom.net ; blessedraven@roadrunner.nf.net ; genesis1@teleport.com ; jyjj@alltel.net ; kasey@gloryroad.net ; john.schortinghouse@cwix.com ; eg02@gnofn.org ; mike98@raex.com ; sonyamae@ivillage.com ; blajsmomma@hotmail.com ; lilie59@hotmail.com ; ken.car@bmts.com ; guillardo@hotmail.com ; jlown@wvwise.org ; godsrobin@roadrunner.nf.net ; dlw.crocket@nf.sympatico.ca ; GODJESUS@BELLATLANTIC.NET ; mary_kamman@hotmail.com ; 2568@nethawk.com <2568@nethawk.com>; kpatrick@greatbend.net ; kraea@uswest.net Subject: BirdWorld - "Campus Visit" Date: Friday, April 09, 1999 7:27 PM PROLOGUE Ever wonder what would have happened if the entire world had "gone to the birds?" IT HAS! In BirdWorld. This is the saga of Robin Mallory, wife, mother and working female bird. How are things going for her lately? We'll ask "Chipper" Birdwell, Robin's father, to bring us up to date. BirdWorld -- "Campus Visit" We find Chipper in his tree, perched on a lower limb, very deep in thought. We startle him as we move in closer. "WOW!" he said as he backpedaled on the limb,"you guys really scared me, sorry I wasn't paying attention, I was sort of daydreaming. Well, you see, recently Robin and Joe were talking about their old college days and I guess I was wondering what it would be like for an old cogger like me to go to school there. Yep, I'd really feel out of place, like an abacus standing next to a computer! HE HE HE Well, I have to tell you that all this "college talk" started because Robin and Joe had flown over to their old school with Peter Delmar, he'll be entering his freshman year in a few months. His parents, Robert and Carla, wanted to come also, so they won permission from the BirdWorld Council to go with them. Carla was worried because she couldn't fly there until Robin came up with the idea that their computer enhanced canine friend Otto could take all of them there in a flash! So Robin radioed Otto, and he appeared there in a matter of seconds. I stayed behind to watch the kids but Robin told me all about it when she returned! Otto brought along his wife, Samantha Maddog, because she wanted to see the university that her father and her sisters had attended. So, in a instant, everyone was standing in front of the main office building, a great large brick structure with many windows. As they all walked inside, they were greeted by Professor Alfred M Whitall, a rather large, imposing looking barn owl who came holding a book under one wing and waving the other one. "Please, all of you, walk with me to my office, Robin, you and Joe remember this building well, don't you?" "Of course," Robin chirped,"Joe and I were worked part-time here during our college days." "Yes, being here sure brings back a lot of memories," Joe said. As they all moved down the hallway, they noticed all the beautiful painting on the walls. "That's my dad!" Samantha yelled as she pointed at his portrait. "And isn't that Prairie Mason beside him?" Otto asked. "You are both correct, my perceptive canines!" the Professor said with a chuckle,"Samantha, I'll bet that your father didn't tell you everything about his college career, did he?" "Well, he said he graduated top of his class, and ......." "And you haven't heard the whole story, have you? Well, you see, both Ben Maddog and Prairie Mason came to the school in the same year, and they quickly became bitter rivals." "Rivals? Why they're the best of friends now ...." "My dear, they weren't back then! Each tried to outdo the other, they're grades were INDENTICAL, straight A's, even thru their senior year. They were co-validictorians and on graduation day, each of them was still claiming to be the better student." "Gee, Professor, is that why you have their portraits on the wall?" "That and the fact that each of them continues to contribute generously to the college. I'm so proud of both of them, each has a very successful law practice and are still considered two of the finest graduates of this institution!" "What about my sisters, sir?" "They, too were excellent students, and very competitive as well! I remember once I almost had to suspend them when they got into a fight over who was the better Maddog sister! It was a good thing that the Computer Dinosaur was attending that year ....." "Really? What did he do?" "He simply walked over to the brawling sisters and said 'Hi Y'all!' I suppose they've never seen a huge Baerasaurus before, so they all ran away yelping!" "I'll have to tease them about that when I get home!" "Well, let's all move along, shall we? My office is at the end of the hallway." So Otto, Samantha. Robin, Joe, Peter, Robert and Carla entered Professor Whitall's office. It was carpeted, well decorated, and had many chairs sitting in front of the Professor's desk. "Please, all of you have a seat," the wise old bird said as he sat behind his desk. "So, Peter, I see you've brought your parents with you, that's wonderful, I am very pleased to meet you, Robert and Carla, right?" "Yes sir, that's correct!" Robert answered. "Carla, I understand that you are a radio talk show host," the Professor said, glancing at his written notes. "Yes sir," Carla replied,"I work at the same radio station Robin does!" "Excellent," the Professor muttered while sorting through more papers," and you, Robert Delmar, I see you are a librarian by trade, correct?" "Yes sir," Robert answered. "Wonderful," the Professor mumbled as he continued rumaging around with the papers on his desk, until he grabbed one and said,"ah, here it is, your transcripts, Peter!" "Professor Whitall," Otto interrupted,"I'm curious. You mentioned the Computer Dinosaur in the hallway, how did this college accommidate a reptile that huge?" "Good question, Otto," the Professor began,"we at this college, we accept and teach all types and sizes of animals, but I must admit, the Dinosaur posed an interesting challenge! Good thing we have an empty cave near the campus, most of the time he would have to attend class by poking his long neck through an open window, but sometimes we'd hold classes outside just so he'd be comfortable. He didn't eat at the cafeteria a lot, he preferred to walk off campus and graze on the nearby forest." "Yes, I sure can remember that!" Robin said with a laugh,"we birds had to make sure not to perch in those trees when it was dinner time, didn't want to get accidently swallowed!" "Yeah," Joe added,"and I can remember the one time he couldn't hold a sneeze in class, he almost blew us all away!" "Speaking of dinosaurs," Professor Whitall said,"I see we'll be having another one this year! She comes highly recommended, someone named Dree-'el" "Dree-'el!" Samantha shouted, "that's the Dinosaur's girlfriend!" "Yes of course!" Otto added,"now I remember, I thought I heard her saying something about attending school." "So, you know her?" the Professor said with a surprised look on his face,"it must be a small world, indeed! Peter, we have arranged for you to stay at the campus birdhouse during your tenure here, the birdhouse is due east of here about a quarter mile, you can't miss it." "Thank you, sir!" Peter replied. The Professor removed his glasses and said,"I can see that all of you are quite polite, but will you please stop calling me Sir and Professor, just call me Al! OK? Speaking of attendance, Samantha, why don't you attend this year?" "Me?" Samantha said with surprise. "Yes, you, my dear!" Professor Whitall,"your father and your sisters are graduates here, why don't you get your law degree also?" "Well, I just got married and we don't have a lot of money, and ......" "Let me show you something," the Professor said as he opened a desk drawer and pulled out a sealed envelope,"this was given to me by your father, Samantha. Inside it contains a legal document stating that if you were ever to decide to attend our fine institution, that he, the great Ben Maddog, would pay ALL of your expenses!" "WOW, he did that for me?" "Yes, he did, Samantha, he had faith that one day, you would decide to follow in your sister's pawsteps and get your degree, NOW will you consider attending this college?" "Go for it, Sam!" Otto urged,"you'll enjoy it!" "Please, ma'am, will you consider it?" Peter said shyly,"It would be nice to have at least one animal I know attending school with me." "Well....," Samantha said,"OK, I'll do it!" "Great!" Professor Whitall said with a smile," now we'll discuss your accomodations also!" "I wouldn't be staying on campus," Samantha said, "I'd be more of a commuting student." "Of course, that's right!" the Professor said,"you're married to a computer enhanced canine who can transport you here and back in seconds, right?" "How did you know that, Al?" Otto asked. "Hey, I read the papers, I watch the news," the Professor said calmly,"you and your master are making quite a name for yourselves, fighting crime, upholding justice, rescuing ...." "Wow!" Carla said excitedly,"I didn't know you were a hero in this world, too!" "This is GREAT!" Peter shouted," I'll be in class with the wife of a Superhero!" "Now, calm down, my eager cardinal," Professor Whitall said,"one important lesson you'll learn in your older years is to not get too excited, be calm, sober, take life with stride, OK?" "Yes sir ... er ... I mean, Al!" Peter replied. They all spent the rest of the afternoon in the Professor's office, setting up class schedules and filling out paperwork. As they left his office, Robin discovered she'd left her purse behind, and opened the office door to retrieve it. She saw the Professor jumping, dancing, and shouting,"HOORAY!!!! Samantha is FINALLY enrolled!" When he turned and saw Robin picking up her purse, he was speechless. "Professor," she said with a smile,"what was all that about not getting excited, about taking life in stride?" The Professor giggled and said,"well, I guess I'm violating my own rules! Maybe you should send me to the dean's office!" Robin and Alfred laughed. So, it looks like Peter Delmar will have some friends with him when the semester starts, that's good! Maybe someday I'll visit the campus, and maybe I'll be on the baseball team, and hit the winning homer for the homecoming game, and ...... oops, looks like now I'm getting a little excited, huh? Oh well, I guess I can dream, can't I? Time for me to fly now, I'm going to meet Robin and the grandkids over at the Lucky Leaf for dinner, I hope we get the filet of earthworm under glass, now THAT's worth going out to dinner for! Bye for now! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------