Copyright 1998 --  Robert Baer Jr.

PROLOGUE

Ever wonder what would happen if the world had gone "to the birds?"  IT
HAS!  In BirdWorld.   This is the story of Robin Mallory, loving wife,
mother and radio station manager.   How does she do it all?   We'll ask
her dad, "Chipper" Birdwell!

BirdWorld - "Office Party"

We search for Chipper in his tree, the wily old bird is sitting on a lawn
chair holding a bucket.   "Hi there!" Chipper says to us,"have you ever
sat down to enjoy a nice, quiet dinner only to find that there are snails
in your bucket of worms?    Look at this!   Who invited these snails in
here?   Some birds may like them, but I don't!   Hard shells. they're too
gritty for my taste!   This is kinda what happaned at the WBIRD Christmas
Party last night, we had to deal with the worst kind of 'party crasher',
but let me tell you the whole story:

It was a week before Christmas, and the station was having it's annual
Christmas Party.   It was late afternoon and already folks were gathering
in the lobby.   Babs Finchly was there with her boyfriend, Thrush Limbird
was mingling with the crowd.  Meadowlark Gremmon and his wife Gertrude
were having a pleasant conversation with Carla and Robert Delmar.   On the
other side of the room was Robin and Joe, who kept trying to get Wild Bill
to stop making funny animal noises as folks were eating.   Edward R
Sparrow was in a long conversation with Howard Yates, who tried to walk
away from him several times only to see Edward follow him and continue his
"lecture."  

An hour passed before Mr Bizsop and his wife Abigale entered the lobby,
and promptly began passing out Christmas bonus checks!   Things seemed to
be going so well, everyone was enjoying themselves and having a good time!
  Then, a mysterious bird came sneaking in through the back door,
unnoticed by all the guests.  This bird waited patiently until Carla was
alone, and then approached her with a big smile on his beak.   "Carla
Delmar!" he said politely,"so there you are, you seemed to have done well
for yourself!"   With one glance, Carla knew who this smooth talking
person was,"Jerry Goldfinch, what are you doing here?"

"Looking for you!"  Jerry said with a lilt in his voice,"you do remember
me, don't you?"

"Oh yes, I sure do!"  Carla chirped,"you're the station manager of KWING
radio, and as my memory serves, you refused to even interview me a few
months ago when I came into your office."

"Well, that was just a misunderstanding,"  Jerry answered,"of course we'd
interview the great Carla Delmar, one of the rising stars on the radio
horizon ..... "

"Can the flattery!"  Carla sneared,"why are you here now?"

"I'm here to offer you a better job,  top billing with your own morning
show, better money and no jerky side kick like that idiot Wild Bill to
contend with!   What do you say?"

"Wild Bill is not an idiot!   He's a kind, gentle bluejay and a pleasure
to work with."

"Oh c'mon, Carla!   The bird's a lunatic!   Besides, we'll pay you a lot
more to come work for us."

"Look, Jerry, I know the real reason you're here!   Me and Wild Bill are
burying YOUR morning show in the ratings, and you think I'll leave WBIRD
because you're dangling dollar bills in front of me!   Mr Biszop took a
chance on me when no one else including YOU would!   Now, please leave me
alone, I want to return to the party."

"You haven't heard my offer yet!"  Jerry chirped as he stepped in front of
Carla's path.

"I've heard enough,"  Carla said in frustration,"now get out of my way!"

"You're going to listen to me!"  Jerry yelled as he grabbed Carla's
wheelchair,"our station needs you, name your price!"

"Let go!"  Carla screamed, Wild Bill came flying toward them.

"Is this doofus bothering you, Carla?"  Wild Bill said.

"Yes,"  Carla answered back,"he's an uninvited guest who is making a
nuisance of himself."

"Want me to hit him with a Christmas tree?"  Wild Bill said eagerly,"I'll
deck him in the halls!"

More folks surrounded Jerry Goldfinch, including Mr Biszop.   "Jerry!"  he
yelled,"what are you doing at MY Christmas party?"

"Look, Stephen,"  Jerry answered," I was only negotiating with Carla
Delmar, she's going to join my station!"

"In your dreams, you crude little vulture!"  Carla snapped.

"Can't you take no for an answer," Robert spoke as he stood beside his
wife,"leave her alone!"

"Carla, you have too much talent to be wasting it here!"  Jerry
pleaded,"you won't get anywhere here.   Even the once mighty Thrush
Limbird is a wimp now!   I wouldn't hire him if he begged me too!"

"I'd rather be eaten by a crocodile than work for a birdbrain like you,
Goldfinch!"  Thrush replied.

"Mr Goldfinch,"  Mr Biszop said calmly,"you're not welcome here, leave or
I'll call the police!"

"Let them come!"  Jerry yelled,"it'll be free publicity for me and KWING
radio!"

"Leave now, or I'll let Wild Bill take care of you!"

"Oh no!   Not him!   He's crazy!"

"I'm not crazy!"  Wild Bill replied,"you made my friend Carla very upset,
maybe I should smack that beak right off your silly looking face!    Maybe
I should throw you off the top of this tree and see how far you bounce!"

"I'm leaving, I'm leaving!"   Jerry said in a stuttering fearful
voice,"but one day all of you will work for me, someday ...."

"Someday, my prints will come!"  Wild Bill began singing as he threw
sesame seeds and crackers at Jerry.

"Keep that maniac away from me!"  Jerry screamed as he flew out the back
door.

"What's the matter with him?"  Wild Bill asked,"and I was just about ready
to serve him some holiday punch, with real boxing gloves in it!"

Everyone laughed!    

"Carla, are you alright?"  Robin asked.

"I'm fine,"  Carla said with a smile,"that nimrod had some nerve sneaking
in here and thinking I'd leave all my new friends at the drop of a hat!  
This place is more than just a place to work, I consider you all dear
friends!"

"We all feel the same way!"  Meadowlark Gremmon chirped.

"You bet we do!"  Thrush added.

"It would be sad news if you left the station,"  Edward R Sparrow said.

"Ok, enough talk of Mr Goldfinch!"  Mr Biszop exclaimed,"now, let's enjoy
the rest of the evening!"

Everyone did enjoy the party!   There were no other disruptions, except
when Wild Bill began yodeling!    Oh well, I have to agree with Carla,
loyalty is more important than money, and friends mean more in life than a
vast fortune does!   That Goldfinch character reminds me a lot of these
snails, hard shelled and no good!   Now, if you'll please excuse me, I
have to go to Robin's house, I'm helping their kids learn their lines for
the Christmas play next week, why don't you come and watch it with me, OK?
   Bye for now.........

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