GIFTS

"Merry Christmas, man! I come bearing gifts."

Lucas looked up from his post behind the cash register. "Gifts for who? We're the only ones here."

"Oh." Mark's face fell. "Well, that's okay, cause everybody's present was going to be a hug and a pinch on the ass for the girls. I guess those can keep." He went behind the cash register and hugged Lucas. "Hope you like your gift, man."

Lucas patted him on the back. "I'll treasure it for decades and hand it on to my children."

"Cool." Mark giggled and pulled on his nametag. "So, how come we're then only ones with Christmas duty?"

"Well, I'm here because Joe is spending the day with Jane's family in California, and you're here because you're the only other person stupid enough to show up."

"That's because I have an amazing work ethic," Mark said proudly. "Or, you know, cause I broke my brother's TV with my bass and I need the cash."

"Television is the opiate of the masses, Mark. He's better off without it."

"That's what I told him, but, you know. He wants his opiate." Mark opened a folding chair next to Lucas and sat down. "So why are we open today anyway? I mean, its Christmas. Who the hell's gonna show up?"

The door opened with a ding, and a frazzled woman walked up to the cash register. "Hello. We need to be at my mother's house in ten minutes, but my son absolutely must have the new Silverchair album, whatever that is. Can you help me?"

Lucas closed his book and gave Mark a look. "People like this poor woman are going to show up. Its in the alternative section, ma'am."
 

 

Mark poked Lucas on the arm. "Hey. Hey. Hey, Lucas."

"What is it, Mark?" Lucas said without looking up from his book.

"Entertain me. Cause, like, I'm bored."

"Why don't you restock the shelves or something, Mark."

"Because that would be boring, Lucas. You're kind of missing the point of the whole entertainment thing."

"Write a song or something. I'm trying to read."

Mark sighed and poked Lucas again. "See, I would, but I left my notebook at home. Besides, right now my band is kind of in a state of flux. Cause, like, I want it to be metal, but our lead guitarist, right? He wants it to be like a punky, Depeche Mode, Doors kinda hybrid thing. And he hates the name."

"Hmm. That's very interesting." Lucas turned a page in his book.

"So we're gonna quit playing instruments and everyone's gonna play a saw."

"Uh-huh."

"And I'm going to get a sex change and start calling myself Veronica."

"It's a good name for you."

Mark pouted. "I hate you, Lucas."

"I hate you too, Veronica."

 

"Okay, its break time."

Mark had been pouting with his chin on his knees, but now he perked up. "Break time?"

Lucas stood up, stretching his arms above his head. "Yep. We haven't had a customer in two hours, I finished my book ten minutes ago, and I think I remember there being a sandwich and some M&Ms in the fridge."

"You finished your book ten minutes ago? I've been going crazy over here, Lucas!"

"Well, it had a very interesting bibliography." Lucas smiled and put his arm around Mark. "Come on. I'll think up something interesting to do in the break room."

"You better. You owe me for mental anguish."

"Well, I still haven't given you your Christmas present. Maybe that'll make up for it."

"Present?" Mark grinned. "What is it?"

Lucas pinched him on the ass.
 

 

The 'closed' sign was on the door, the sandwich was gone, and the M&Ms were too stale for human consumption. Still, after three hours of sitting on their asses behind a cash register, Mark and Lucas didn't want to open again. Instead they sat on their asses in the break room couch and threw M&Ms into an empty Big Gulp cup.

"So my mom, she like, didn't know how to handle me, cause I'm so weird and punk rock and she thinks she did too many drugs in the sixties, which explains me, right? So she sent me to live with my big brother, who's like this total Wall Street, Young Republican type. Except she didn't know that in college he registered Green Party, and he has all this weird, like, boho friends who smoke weed and a girlfriend who doesn't shave her armpits." Mark finally paused for breath. "So really, I got this total education in, like, Allen Ginsberg and how to make a bong out of anything. And how to, like, destory the system from within. Hee."

"Ahh." Lucas nodded.

"Its kind of like what happened with you and Joe, sorta."

"How do you figure?"

"Yeah. Like, your mom packed you off for being, like, a bad seed or whatever." Mark didn't look at Lucas as he said this. "But then you ended up with Joe, who lets you get away with smoking his cigars and stealing ten thousand dollars and everything."

"Actually it was nine thousand," Lucas observed.

"Right. And inadverdantly destroying any chances of a Music Town popping up here for a long long time. The ultimate act of bringing down the system from within. Very cool, by the way."

Lucas bowed his head humbly. "I had help from the best."

"Hell, yeah. Damn the man!" Mark raised his fist. He threw another M&M into the cup. "You know, this game of M&M basketball isn't very challening."

"Yeah. Next time maybe we should use a Dixie Cup or something."

"Yeah." Mark ducked his head. "So, um, do you ever like, talk to your Mom?"

Lucas' M&M missed the cup and rolled beneath a chair. "Nah. I mean, I'm eighteen now so I could get the records to contact her and everything, but...I don't know. I don't know what I'd say to her. Besides apologizing for being a devil spawn."

"C'mon, Lucas. I mean, you're a good guy. You're like Buddha reincarnated, lately. Take it from me, the ultimate spastic destructive kid. You're not devil spawn."

Lucas smiled. "I don't think an Ozzy fan is exactly the guy to determine who's devil spawn and who's not."

"No way, man! An Ozzy fan is exactly the guy to know who's devil spawn or not. I mean, how else would we recognize our master?" Mark stuck out his tongue and did the devil sign with his hand. "Besides, you like the Smiths. I think the Smiths are too fruity for devil spawn."

Lucas' mouth tightened and he threw another M&M. It hit the coffee table with a clunk, and Lucas swore beneath his breath.

Mark's eyes widened. Since his little Atlantic City experience, Lucas hadnt even swore. He was too mellow. "Uh...whats wrong, Lucas? Oh! Like, I didn't mean to insult the Smiths, cause like, you know they're cool and everything, but...Morrissey is gay and all."

"I know. Just one of the many reasons my mom thought I was a bad seed."

"Cause you liked the Smiths?"

Lucas gave him a 'no, you idiot' look. "Cause I liked boys."

Mark sat up straight. Finally he said, "Oh."

Lucas smiled a little bit at the sight of Mark rendered speechless. "Oh."

"So, um...does Joe know? Wait, why didn't we know?"

"Yeah, Joe knows. When I was fourteen he gave me the whole condom-on-a-banana demonstration. And a really awkward talk about how he and his best friend Jimmy used to go swimming together when they were thirteen." Lucas shuddered. "I never really got the relevancy out of that one, but then, I cut out of there once Joe said the word 'bathing suit'."

"But how come you didn't tell any of us?" Mark hit him on the arm. "Dude! We're the Empire."

Lucas shrugged. "I don't know. It just never came up."

"Oh, come on. That's bullshit."

Lucas stood up abrubtly. "Come on. Time to open again."
 

 

"So, do you just like boys, or are you like, bisexual?"

Lucas looked up from his book. He'd regained his composure, and was back to his usual Zen master cool. "While I do have a certain...aesthetic interest in women, in general, I prefer men."

"Cool." Mark took a few more swipes at the floor with the push broom. "You know, Rob Halford's gay."

"I've heard that." Lucas nodded.

"So, do you have a boyfriend right now?"

"Mark, I'm trying to read."

"But you finished that book."

"I'm reading it again." Lucas calmly turned a page. "Its very interesting."

"Come on, don't be a pussy." Mark leaned the broom against the counter and came to sit beside Lucas.

"No, I don't have a boyfriend."

"How come?" Lucas gave him a look. "Come on. You're a good-looking guy, you're at your sexual peak."

"Do you have a girlfriend, Mark?"

Mark thought for a minute. "Um...no."

"Well, you're a good-looking guy, you're at your sexual peak," Lucas teased.

Mark blushed. "You think I'm good-looking?"

Lucas looked back at his book. "Okay, we're not having this conversation."

"Nope. Sorry, Lucas. The secret's out: you think I'm sexy. You want me to put on a Rex Manning album and dance for you?" Mark stood up and shook his hips.

"If you do, I'll be forced to break your kneecaps."

"But, like, I need those. For, you know..." Mark gave him a knowing look.

"Shut up, Mark."

Mark nodded vigorously. "Okay, okay. I get it. If I don't shut up, you'll be so overcome with my sexiness that you'll be forced to jump over this counter and pounce on me." He picked up the broom again."

Lucas rolled his eyes. "Mark-" He looked up from his book, but stopped short when he saw Mark, who was innocently sucking on the pacifier he wore around his neck and stroking the handle of the broom in a suggestive manner. He laughed, shook his head, and went back to his book.

"Oh yeah," Mark said to himself. "He wants me."

 

"Closing time," Lucas called. Mark was in the break room, but he poked his head out at the sound of Lucas' voice. "You want a ride home? I've got to pop by the bank, but I can take you on my way."

"Sure. I can keep an eye on you, make sure you don't pop by Atlantic City on accident." Mark put his hands in his pockets and looked at the floor. "Um, actually, since you're alone for Christmas and all...do you wanna just stay at my place tonight? Like, my brother's having this big Christmas party. Lots of spiked egg nog and a bong made from Christmas tree ornaments."

"Are you sure? I don't wanna crash or anything."

"No, it'll be great! I mean, if you don't come it'll be just me and my brother's friends. I don't want to be hit on by some drunken chick with twenty piercings in her face. Be my savior, man." Mark looked at him pleadingly.

Lucas smiled. "Okay."

"Okay." Mark grinned. "Cool."
 

 

Mark opened the door to his apartment while Lucas stood nervously with his hands in his pockets. He'd never been to Mark's apartment before. The Empire employees were close, but in general they tended to hang out only during store hours. This was kind of unprecedented.

Mark turned to him. "You have to take off your shoes in the house. Which is stupid, cause like, the rug is totally dirty anyway. But Ryan had a Japanese girlfriend a couple years ago, and it just kind of stuck."

Lucas bent down to untie his shoes, while Mark just toed his own battered sneakers off.

Inside, every surface was covered with people-couch, floor, coffee table, speakers, everywhere-but Mark didn't seem startled by this. Instead he just waved when he spotted his brother in the midst of the crowd. "Hey, Ryan. This is Lucas. He works at Empire with me."

Ryan was about twenty-five, less goofy-looking than Mark but with the same cloud of curly blond hair. "Hey, Lucas." Lucas raised a hand in greeting.

"Is my room free?"

"Yeah, I kept everyone outta there. Last time I had a party, Mark complained about mysterious stains on his bedspread," Ryan explained to Lucas. "I told him it was probably just vodka and cranberry juice, but he insists that my friends were doing some sort of black mass in there. I told him, the kid who broke my TV while playing a Black Sabbath song shouldn't be so damn judgemental."

Mark rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. From my paycheck directly to your pocket. Listen, Lucas's gonna stay here tonight. That cool?"

"Yeah, sure. Use a condom," Ryan said, then turned back to the game of quarters being conducted on his coffee table. Mark blushed bright red and led Lucas into his room.

"So, is your brother psychic, or do I just have a big rainbow flag on my forehead now?" Lucas asked as Mark shut the door behind them.

"Um, no. Actually, I kind of do." In fact, he did. Mark held a miniature rainbow flag against his forehead and smiled nervously.

Lucas just stared at him. "So, you're..."

"Well. Bi, anyway. Um, yeah." He lowered the flag. "Surprised?"

"Wait a second. Weren't you just giving me a bunch of crap about not telling you guys at Empire about me?"

Mark sat down on his bed. "They know about me. Well, Deb does. She caught me staring at David Bowie's package on a poster. And I came out to Eddie when Rob Halford did. So."

"So why didn't you tell me?" Lucas sat next to Mark on the bed, and Mark held his breath, leaned in, and kissed him. Lucas was too stunned to kiss back.

When Mark realized that Lucas wasn't responding, he pulled back, his cheeks bright red again. "Oh. Um, okay, sorry." He stood up. "I'll just-"

"No!" Lucas pulled him back onto the bed. Mark wouldn't look him in the face, so Lucas turned his face gently til their eyes met. "So, all that stuff you said back at the Empire...you like me?"

"Well...yeah, sorta. But if you don't like me, its totally cool. Like, since you're here you can have the bed and I'll just sleep on the floor, and-" Mark's babbling was cut short by Lucas' lips on his. This time they were both responding-Lucas' tongue stroked the inside of Mark's mouth, and Mark ran his fingers through Lucas' hair. Then he pulled back and pushed Lucas' head down, searching through his hair with his fingers.

"Uh...Mark? What are you doing?"

"Looking for sixes."

"What?" Lucas tried to raise his head to look at Mark, but Mark forced his head back down.

"You know, three sixes. The sign of the beast? He's supposed to put it on all his spawn. Huh." He let go of Lucas' head, and instead started to pull up Lucas' shirt. "Guess I'll have to keep looking..."

END

Return to Random Fandoms